What to do if caught in a love square?

[Anonymous]

I’ve been with my boyfriend (boy 1) for about 3 years now. We have had ups and downs, and are currently in counseling to aid the relationship. I’m not sure if we’re made to be though since I basically had to teach him how to treat me like his girlfriend and be a good partner. Overall though, I feel mostly comfortable with him since we’ve had a deep continuous connection for a long time.

Guy 2 and I have had on and off communication for about 5 years (I met him online). At first, I never really paid him much mind and we naturally never got close. Within the last few months, he reconnected with me and we were able to develop a good friendship bond in this time. However, recently, he disclosed that he saw the our connection can be something more for him and would really love to start it with me. I declined and we’re still friends but that’s still on my mind.

Guy 3 I just met recently online as well and again it was friendly until he asked for my hand in a relationship way which I declined and we’re still friends now too. He has the same personality as me and more relatable to compared to the other guys.

I'm not a cheater and I didn’t want to start anything with these 2 other men I met, but now I can’t help but to wonder if they’re better for me compared to my boyfriend since my relationship with him has been kind of rocky and I’m not sure if he’s ready for marriage that he promised me which will come in May of this year (according to his plan). He tends to make a lot of false promises. I had to get upset at him for something to click in his mind so he could go to the jewelry store to get my engagement ring he promised to give me on Valentine’s Day/our anniversary. He showed it to me before he gave it (no surprise), it doesn’t fit me, and isn’t the diamond shape I liked for myself. I asked when he’ll get it resized and there’s no response. It’s things like this that makes me wonder so I don’t know if I should pursue something else or leave him. What should I do?

[Anonymous]

The grass is always greener, because someone's fertilized it with bull-shit.

When you get there you realize it's not greener, it's just covered with cow patties.

Temptation is just that, and no guarantee of a better anything.

Most will say leave. I ask, you'll happy to throw away all of that time and effort playing build-a-bitch, for a maybe? Nothing like being committed. And you're talking about marriage? This is the worse of 'for better or worse' and your start looking to trade?

Wow!

[Asker]

We haven’t gotten married yet or engaged. We were thinking about it but he doesn’t seem that interested in doing so because my family doesn’t really like him.

[Opinion Owner]

I didn't say married or engaged. I said committed, which you seem ready to abandon for one of two other guys.

Maybe he isn't interested because he feels your urge to find someone different? You're words actions, body language and inferences show through. There's a lot of truths in innocuous, joking commentary. You're veiled pokes aren't so veiled.

Your family doesn't like him? I wonder why? What one sided story have you told them. I wonder how they'd feel about your motivations about guys 2 and 3?

It really matters not to me. You don't seem to like him very much, but you're staying for familiarity, hence my saying the grass is greener. Leave him and when the other guys turn out to be worse, you'll regret c changing in someone so quickly. All over your lack of certainty and commitment.

[Asker]

I’m not ready to abandon this commitment, hence why I made this post because I’m not sure what to do. I have always treated him well, and I can say confidently that I didn’t give him any doubts regarding me in the relationship however based off his behaviors, I have had my doubts.

My family doesn’t like him because they wanted someone within our culture instead of an outsider. Yes I have told them about the other guys and they didn’t really help.

That’s all you had to say in the last paragraph besides all this extra stuff above. Thanks.

[RobT312]

Well it’s not really a love square, you are only friends with the other guys. you do sound unhappy in your relationship so you should fix it so you are happy, or take a break and see if someone else can make u happy

[Asker]

Thanks

[Anonymous]

Is there any opportunity for Guy 4?

Hi...

[Asker]

No thanks

[Anonymous]

Rectangles are better.

[Asker]

Sarcasm is not allowed here