Does cheating on your partner mean you are intentionally trying to hurt them?

[Anonymous]

I've been with this guy since 2018. He and I fell in love with each other. I know he'll do anything for me and has done for me. He is an amazing provider. He's good to my son from a prior relationship. My family loves him and his family loves me. We've even gotten pregnant and he is elated.

But I found out he has been cheating on me with the same woman since we began our relationship. He even cheated during my fist pregnancy which I miscarried. Now we are pregnant again. I've learned there may be multiple other women too that came and went but only one woman has been consistent. He even had unprotected sex with this woman too regularly from what I am learning.

Aside from the cheating he has been a good guy to me.

Is it possible he does really love me or is the act of his cheating a sign that he didn't really care. I know it's not a good thing but it's hard for me to forget the positive things he has done for me and how he's loved me.

[Nawlins34]

You're excusing his behavior and you're enabling him.
He's insulting you.

In my opinion, there are two types of cheaters when it comes to men

1.) Need - this guy only cheats because whatever he is lacking in his relationship/marriage, the need is so great he has to cheat. The woman who cheats with him, provides what is missing for him. If the woman he's married/serious with had this, he'd never cheat to begin with. It sounds logical, but the truth is, he isn't bold enough to just end the relationship/marriage and go for what he really wants.

He settled and he needs a supplement. If caught, he may/may not admit this,

2.) Greed - He cheats for the sport, you can't satisfy this guy. You can be everything he's ever wanted, he'll still cheat. The end.

He's been "good" to you, because he can cheat without being held accountable.
I can't say he doesn't love you, but he doesn't respect you and you don't fulfill everything he's looking for.

Which one is your husband? I would've say #1 if he only ever cheated with one woman, but you confirmed there has been other women.

He sounds like #2 - greed.

[Finchie40]

Just because someone is a good person and nice to you they are still a piece of shit if they are cheating on you , it means he doesn’t value you , he only likes the convenience of you, he doesn’t love you , he loves himself , realize you deserve better than that , you deserve someone that can remove selfishness for you like they expect you to do for them , do yourself a favor and end it with this guy He is a total piece of shit

[BigWhiteWolf87]

A cheater doesn't respect their partner. Boy/girlfriends & husbands/wives that respect their partners don't cheat. A lack of respect means, deep down, they do not care.

So does that mean are they intentionally trying to hurt you? If I run over your foot with my car because I don't care you're standing there... am I not intentionally hurting you?

[Anonymous]

Dont take no ones shit. Just because he's sometimes good towards you. You want and need someone who respects you to your face and behind your back. You deserve better