Men 40+: is it normal to day a woman over 1 year & not what to get her pregnant if it’s not casual?

[Anonymous]

I’m just trying to gage where this guys head is at.

Updates

+1 y

*date not “day”. Sorry about the typo.

[Anonymous]

He's got plenty of time. You do not. Take control. Sit him down, express your love for him and satisfaction with him, time for some super straight taking. There's a risk that you cannot find agreement or he won't commit. But at least you'll know.

[Asker]

I agree with that logic except for the misconception that he has time. Look at all of the new research on male fertility. You can tell it’s been driven by men as it puts all of the emphasis on only women having shorter fertility spans and mens issues being buried in the sand like they don’t exist. It’s funny in one sense but not in another as men that would like to take control of their own fertility often aren’t able to until it’s too late because of the common misconceptions that are still so strong but wrong today.

[Drumlin2001]

Unless you've had discussions about kids it may not be on his agenda

[Asker]

He does want them, I’m just not sure when

[Drumlin2001]

Assuming you want them, if you're late thirties/early forties you don't have time to waste.
Have a direct conversation with him today

[Asker]

I only want them if it feels right, I’m not set on anything one way or another.

[Drumlin2001]

Where do you see yourself in 5 years? Is he a central part if your future?

[Asker]

I see him as being so yes if he’s on the same page, but he’s said he doesn’t know what will happen in the future yet. Hence my doubt and concern.

[Drumlin2001]

It's up to you how much time you're prepared to invest until you get some certainty. I'd have thought a year would be enough to whether you want to be with someone.
Feels like you may not get a clear answer any time soon. You may find the time lost, and you can't get it back

[Asker]

I know. This is why I’ve said I’m going to be open to dating others if he’s unsure.