My boyfriend and I been dating for roughly 4 years, meeting during undergrad when I was in my 3rd year and he was in his 1st through a mutual friend. The relationship at first was very tough due to him lying about a situation-ship he had with a girl in his friend group amongst other things like giving his female friend his jacket. His mother doesn’t like me much, and my family doesn’t support the relationship so we don’t have much of a family influence even though he does whatever his mom tells him to.
Over time, things started to get slightly better since we went to couple’s counseling twice but there were still hiccups along the way. He would make really mean/rude jokes knowing that my emotional state would be high, leading me to cry and him being surprised that I’m upset. I also requested him to let me know if he’s planning on sleeping so I don’t expect a text from him (our primary mode of communication since we are 3 hours away from each other). He doesn’t even do that, and makes me feel bad for even wanting that.
When we are together, it’s usually fun or chill. He would commonly request for sex and stuff like that which makes me feel great that I’m wanted (since he made me feel bad about my body before) but after sex, all of the romantic stuff is gone and he wouldn’t want sex for the next couple of days until he’s ready again. He only does it for his satisfaction and rarely for mine, and often pushes my boundaries of where he can finish (iykyk).
Last time I saw him, he kept saying he had a big surprise waiting for me the whole week and pushed our hangout back for it just for him to give me a bouquet of flowers from the grocery store. I was grateful for the gift but obviously expected more, and kept asking him to just tell me his original plan/gift but he kept decline which made me more upset.
I’m not sure if he respects me or how to feel about him anymore. I asked him 1 small favor tonight that needed to get done earlier, got so rude, and disappeared.
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