My girlfriend went through my phone and found screenshots from Instagram of othr girls, and now she doesn't want to talk to me anymore. What can I do?

[Anonymous]

I didn't cheat on her and I love her with all of my heart, but because she says she is not ready to have sex, I found myself quite often gathering fap material in order to satisfy my needs. However, no matter how I tried to explain the photos to her, she just kept on crying saying that I used her, just because she didn't have a boyfriend, and she accuses me of having a crush actually on another girl, which is not true. I tried calling her today and she doesn't answer my calls.

What can I do to regain her trust? I know very well that I was in the wrong, but I don't want to lose her.

[AviatorTom]

You say the pictures are there for your fapping, and she is reasonably upset because you're jerking off the someone other than her. You need to reassure her that she's the one you find most attractive.

This may not work, but you can try it.

Tell her you find her so attractive that you get hard just thinking about her, and that you'd love to have her watch you jerk off, thinking only about her. Then go do it... show her how excited you get thinking about her.

[Lycirian]

The Problem isn't you or what you did. The problem here is that women still don't understand that men will always do things like that. We watch at other women we look at pictures some even like to see movies. It is our genetic code. If we wouldn't be like that we would run after them.

The second here is that she doesn't want being intimate but the question for that is. How long are you two together and did she got a past story what is connected with the part of having sex.

[Asker]

We have been together for a little over a year. She is a virgin, that's why she is scared to have sex and she wanted to trust me before we went all the way...

[Lycirian]

And by all respect, she has not the right to go to through your phone anyway. You both are not married. This was disrespecting your privacy. In my eyes you can't trust her. What she does next? Going through your bank account? Really I can't stand this that a girl goes through your phone and then act that a guy the bad one.

[Asker]

I gave my permission for her to go through my phone... I trusted her and I expected her to trust me back for every explanation I had for any unsettling pictures she might find

[Lycirian]

Dude that doesn't matter. As soon as you give permission to that and she asks you for anything else like that and then you say NO, she will asap think that you are keeping a secret from her. I'm married and my wife has no permission to look in my phone or even my bank account.

[Anemone978]

Write her a serious meaningful letter and explain everything that happened and why and how you truly feel about her. You seem like a nice genuine guy so I hope it works out for you two.

[jjj101010]

Hey.

[Anemone978]

@jjj101010 Hey

[jjj101010]

Wanna chat?

[Anemone978]

@jjj101010 Not really...

[jjj101010]

Oh ok, follow me back

[JJ092003]

Why didn't you just fap to her pics? Or watch porn? You've broken her trust. Now you need to ask her how to earn it again.

[Asker]

She doesn't like to appear in pictures. She doesn't have an instagram, and every selfie I tried to take with her, she moved or covered her face, saying that we don't need pictures to remember certain events, because they will stay in our memory anyways.

[Asker]

And there was also porn among those pictures...

[Asker]

I tried talking with her at that moment and she said that everything I am saying could be said by any other guy. What I am saying doesn't prove anything...

[JJ092003]

So then FAP while looking at her in person

[Asker]

That feels like a bad advice... Or at the very least I don't understand how do you expect me to get in that situation...

[JJ092003]

Just be honest. "Hey I'm horny and I wanna fap. Can I look at you while I do it?"

[Anonymous]

She has insecurities. There is nothing you can do about her issues. It's a her problem than a you problem.

[Asker]

She has every right to have insecurities. But what should I do in order to regain her trust?

[Opinion Owner]

Take her to counseling or to a therapist. Like I said, there is nothing YOU can do. SHE has.

[Asker]

I do not agree with this. I know it's much more my fault in this. At the very least for not being able to reassure her on the spot that I only love her..

[Opinion Owner]

If you say so. its your life

[Anonymous]

all trust is gone and out the window. this is why sex and porn usually ruin relationships.

[Starlette_penguin]

You broke her trust, if she's anything like a lot of women she might have considered you saving these as cheating. you are getting sexual gratification from another women's picture...

[Anonymous]

she sounds crazy, stay away lol

[KrakenAttackin]

Move on, you don't owe her anything.