Is it a crush or love?

[Rebel-Angel]

So I recently transferred to a new school, and met this awesome guy, lets call him J. So J and I hang out all the time between classes and we hug and mess with each other and such, but recently all of our teachers think we're dating and I've begun to have feelings for him and he has begun to like me too, (his friends and he told me this) but these feelings between me and J are really strong, like even his ex (who I'm besties with by the way) agrees that we would be ADORABLE together. Should we start dating? (my parents are against this)

[OlderAndWiser]

Your parents are against it. So don't ask them if you can date, because that word will trigger all of their defenses. Insteead, ask if you can invite J for dinner. Ask if you can have dinner at J's house and stay to do some homework afterwards (and actually do the homework.) Those are innocuous activities and the more time they spend with him, they may start liking him and trusting him. And then you can ask for a little more. BUT. . .

You are only 13 years old. Don't be in such a rush to try to make something develop. It will be stronger if you don't push and it develops on its own.

[Rebel-Angel]

my dad saw us say goodbye so he already dont like him.

[SnowedIn]

You have two great questions here.

The first one, crush or love. This is crush. Nothing wrong with that. Just not love yet. What do I define as love? Can't breathe without; wake up every day next to them; would grow old with them; would get ugly and saggy with them; feed them if they were infirm, etc. -- that's love.

As for dating. Hmmmmm. That's a tough one. Here's why: although I don't agree with your parents, I'm never going to be the one to say you should disobey. That said, dating doesn't have to be an announcement or a sign on the highway or a page in a newspaper. And if you go to the mall and happen to run into him... But, leaving your parents out of it for a second, yes, date the guy. Nothing wrong with that and explore more how much you like each other.

[CateM]

It's a crush. Love takes time. Love usually starts out as infatuation, though

[Jennz6]

It’s a crush, maybe lust but it’s not Love 💕

[Guy13]

13 is too young to be dating.

[Derekk]

I've always thought of love as a crush/infatuation + admiration + friendship. Right now you probably don't know him on a profound level, he's just standing out as a really nice guy and someone you should spend more time with. Every love started as a crush.

There are things parents are right about and things parents are wrong about. Two 13 year olds holding hands and kissing and being cute together is not the threat they maybe think it is.

[riverrat3]

Have fun