I need help understanding this be honest but not hateful?

[Anonymous]

I cheated once on my boyfriend, he doesn't trust me 100% understand that so he questions everything I do and I'm open now telling him everything, but I have a feeling he's hidden something from me as well but I don't have no proof plus he hasn't wronged me but im judging by his past, it's wrong of me to do that bc I was the one cheating. But when I'm open with him with everything even tho I messed up like i show him my phone and everything now, but when I feel as tho he's hidden something he doesn't give me a direct answer or give me some type of proof, he throws the I shouldn't show u anything bc I didn't do anything but I see hidden content pop up on his phone but when I'm laying next to him and I get a message of anything he reads and looks over my shoulder, and it's so wrong of me to accuse him of anything bc I did it, is it wrong of me to think this or is it just me being paranoid and acting crazy (he always says that)

[RockyHammock]

Be honest with yourself, are you hoping he cheated so you can feel less guilty over your
actions?

It seems like your relationship is already over

[Asker]

Yes and no I really love being with him but I just hate how he reminds me every single day what I did when I changed my life and also understand and accept my consequences of my actions and I get that he will never be over it or move on bc if it happened to me I would do the same.

[Anonymous]

Yes it is, let it go and focus on the present.

[FifiJones]

Erm. You cheated.