Why my bff of 20 years doesn’t want me?

[Malwi93]

Talking to her husband?

[Anonymous]

I cannot know the specifics of your situation, but it's important to respect your friend's boundaries and decisions. It's possible that your friend is going through personal issues or changes in her life that are causing her to distance herself from you, or she may simply be prioritizing other relationships or responsibilities at this time.

It's important to communicate openly and respectfully with your friend about your feelings and concerns, while also being respectful of her boundaries and decisions. It may be helpful to give her space and time to process her feelings, and to focus on building and maintaining other relationships in the meantime.

It's also important to prioritize your own well-being and self-care, and to seek support from other friends or loved ones if you are struggling with feelings of loss or loneliness. It's normal to feel hurt or disappointed when a long-term friendship changes or ends, but it's important to remember that friendships can ebb and flow over time and that new connections and opportunities for growth and fulfillment can arise.

[Angelo75]

Yeah... there is a very slippery slope with friendships when people get married.

You're supposed to become bff with your spouse. The thing is, you can't be bff with two people at once. Hence the name "best"-ff.

Either you end up letting ur spouse being a bit uneased with the thought that you have a stronger connection with someone else, or you end up letting ur bff feel that you are focussing more on your marriage now.

If within that already complicated situation your bff starts trying to get close to ur spouse, it can start making all kinds of alarm bells go off.

- What if my bff doesn't like my choice of partner?
- What if my partner doesn't like my bff and makes me choose?
- What if they both end up falling in love and cheating behind my back?
- What if one of them tells something to the other, that I didn't want the other to know? Like ur bff saying how many ex-guys u got or ur spouse saying that sometimes you're really frustrated with ur bff?

Basically you and her husband are the two MOST IMPORTANT people in her life right now. Letting the two of you interact will each other can be so scary because she could end up losing one of you, or even both of you in case of cheating. That would simply devastate her to a point she could simply loose the will to live. (no jokes)

So try to see it as a sign that she considers both of u too valuable to risk in an unpredictable situation (from her point of view).

[Bricealan]

Those things happen to all of us, as we all have long-term friends that for some reason, we lose contact with them. For me, my two longest term friends had a drug and pot habit that drove a wedge between us.

[Jkgordon]

Insecure - perhaps you are pretty maybe prettier than her. Or perhaps she thinks he likes you.

[megabamse]

Of 20 years? What you started dating when you where 9? Since your 29 that is.

[PointTaken]

What exactly do you mean?

[Cheerfull009]

When bond increases, intimacy decreases,

[Anonymous]

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