So. I met this boy at a new school. he's tall, athletic, long beautiful hair, a deep voice. he's perfect. Everything I've wanted. His love language is physical affection which i love. But to the point. I started dating him, and we dated for 3 and half months. But throughout our relationship there were many problems, he tried cheating on me with my bsf, he told people that we had s*x. Stuff like that. he's given me bruises on my arms and my neck bc he was mad i was trying to talk to my friends. And i was fed up with it. So i broke up with him. He was mad and started calling me names and saying a bunch of crazy stuff. But recently i caved in and told him how sorry i was and how i wanted him back and stuff like that. And he kept saying that im a lier and a bitch and stuff like that. And today (11/15/21) he finally told me how we felt. He said he misses me too but that me and him can't be together, and he wants to be bsf with me. Which is better than nothing. But i can't stop crying. He told me he loves me but can't be with me. I just dont know what to do. Someone pls lmk what to think about it all
I must tell you something. A guy who is verbally abusive (he called you "bitch." A bitch is a female dog), or who hits you, or wants to control you, this is a BIG RED FLAG! This sort of thing will escalate. He will try to isolate you from your friends and your family, he will want to know where you are and who you're talking to every minute of your life; he will demand that you account to him for every minute out of his sight. He will start hitting you, and THAT can get worse. Girls have ended up dead because they couldn't leave guys like this. The psychology of a guy like this is, he can't believe that ANY girl would stay with him willingly, because he thinks of himself as crap! So he thinks he has to exert complete control to get a girl to stay with him! Plus, if he thinks of himself as crap, you can bet that he thinks that any girl who could love him must also be crap! RUN. THE. OTHER. WAY. You don't need this. You shouldn't have to put up with this And by the way, at 15, you really shouldn't be getting involved that deeply with guys. You are still very young. Your ideas about what you want in a guy will change many times before you're in your mid-twenties! And for heaven's sake, DON'T have sex with anyone who is NOT COMMITTED TO YOU! Sex is supposed to really mean something! Even a kiss is supposed to mean something! You don't dispense them like pretzels! In fact, a good rule of thumb is, before you sleep with a guy, you must have two things: A diamond ring and a wedding date! I'm really serious. Sex isn't a children's game. People can get hurt - I mean emotionally hurt!
He doesn't care about you nor will he ever care. He's abusive and it's your fault for allowing him to treat you that way ( I know it sounds harsh but it's the truth) I've been in your shoes before. You should've pay more attention to the red flags before engaging with him. but Ay, now you know who he is.
"He told me he loves me but can't be with me" No, he does not love you at all, he knows what he's doing. He is well aware of it, trust me.
"he's given me bruises on my arms and my neck bc he was mad" Look at those actions. Do you really think that someone who actually "loved" you would do such a thing?
" im only 15"
I'd suggest you to avoid him and people like him in general, cause the only person that will suffer the consequences is you. You will destroy your self-worth by allowing people like that into your life. Sometimes it's better to actually be alone then to be someone that drains your self-esteem and makes you feel alone. Good luck to you, and remember to walk away now, cause trust me your mental state will get beyond fucked if you let people like that into your life.
Bravo! Well said, YesICan! And for young Ms. Kennedy, let me tell you a story. I knew a married couple. The husband hit the wife. Her voice got very low and her speech was slow and ominous! She said, "If you EVER hit me again, don't go to sleep, because I'll kill you in your sleep!" He was too scared to find out if she meant it. It's no surprise that they are long divorced now. Twenty or more years after the divorce, he sent her a letter asking forgiveness. I don't know if she gave it to him. But I KNOW she will never take him back.
Hi hon, im just gonna tell you this now… he is not going to change. he will try to use you and abuse you again. i know you want to be his bestfriend and get back with him, but he will hurt you even more. you need to tell him that you will not take the abuse that he caused you and move on
of course. i’ve been through it before, it’s the worst feeling in the world and i wish i followed my own advice i gave you lol!! ❤️ i wish you best, you deserve so much better.
If he truly love you he would not call you all those bad names and verbally harass you when you broke up with him. If he can change for the better and prove it to you. then it's possible to get back with him.
Would recommend to have any toxic individuals in your life. it isn't worth it most of the times. It has a huge potential for physical health problems in the long run that can kill/shorten life greatly
RUN RUN RUN he is ABUSIVE, do not accept this for yourself. If you fall into this trap you are going to ruin your teenage years. Think about your self worth and RUN far away from this situation
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0 Reply
Anonymous
(18-24)
+1 y
he's a high quality guy that can get any girl. He doesn't think your good enough for him but is more than happy nasty sex with you as often as he can. Break it off with him, guys like that will destroy you.
The classic toxic bad boy stories... You're not alone babe some smokn hot girl still pay her baby daddy at the jail because he did rape another girl... That's kinda cock carousel stories.. anyway it won't last that much because the wall is undefeated guaranteed... Peace
I think you genuinely want good relationship. Get out of his toxic shit plenty of 6 feet good guys out there just because we don't show the D in the first date doesn't mean we are weak we have morals ethics and some sense of religion. I hope you get someone better
You are a girl... you are your own worst enemy. You will enjoy the beatings and abuse and call it "love" because you are simply a stupid girl who does not know the difference between right and wrong.
You deserve what you get. When you are stupid and stay with guys like this. You will end up in the desert like that other chick with people looking for you.
Didn’t know you were 15. You’re growing up. Now is your time to live life and find yourself. When you get to be my age it’s an entirely different story.
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