Why do exes get jealous of other men being nice to you or trying to get with you?

[Anonymous]

How can they get jealous when you broke up kinda mutually…and they are with someone else…

[OlderAndWiser]

If someone does not have a logical explanation for their feelings, then they are not allowed to have those feelings? Is that the logic at work here? Because, if it is, I am certain that you have many feelings that will not withstand any logical scrutiny.

Guys feel whatever it is that they feel. And their feelings are EMOTIONS, and NOT logical thoughts. The same is true for girls, too, of course. Feelings almost NEVER make sense. So what? That doesn't make them less real.

Maybe the reason you don't understand is simple: you are a female, you think like a female, and you have feelings and emotions like a female. You trying to understand a male, from your perspective, is a lost cause. . . just like men can't truly understand women. That's just the way it is.

[Asker]

No, of course feelings are different to logic. But the whole point of this site is to gain understanding from the opposite sex, no? So what are the emotions saying from a male perspective…
I don’t believe in not being able to understand, I believe in seeking understanding.

[OlderAndWiser]

Most men have an instinct to possess a woman during the relationship and afterwards; even if they initiate the break up, they don't want you to have sex or even date anyone else. I can't explain WHY we feel that way.

[8UniquelyBoring8]

Jealousy can be a complex emotion that can arise from a number of different factors, including feelings of loss, insecurity, or a desire to be wanted. It's possible that your ex-partner may be experiencing feelings of jealousy even though the breakup was mutual and they're seeing someone else now.


It's important to remember that jealousy is a natural human emotion, but it's essential to handle it in a healthy and respectful way. If your ex-partner expresses jealousy towards you, it's essential to approach the situation with empathy and understanding. You can listen to their concerns and try to reassure them that you're not trying to hurt them or interfere in their current relationship. However, it's also important to establish healthy boundaries and not allow their jealousy to interfere with your own happiness or well-being.

[Anonymous]

We’ve got to give our exes the time of day in order to know if they’re jealous of anything. We’ve also got to care, and I wouldn’t give a damn what my ex thought lol. Sounds like the person is either too involved with or too hung up on their ex still.

[ManOnFire]

Because they obviously are not really over you. Let me tell you something: if a girl wants to break up, sometimes a guy will act like he's in agreement with it only so he can stay close to her. By acting like it’s mutual, he figures there's still a chance for friendship and eventually a full reconnect.

And if he's with someone else, he may have gotten into that relationship to either get over you or make you jealous. But we see that you talking to another guy is making him jealous instead.

[Asker]

So if he’s in another relationship (I’m guessing to help get over the breakup and to save face as I don’t think he likes to be seen as single) why would he still be getting jealous?

[ManOnFire]

You just answered your own question. He's in one for show, but still into you.

[Fireguy17]

Because even though they no longer want you, they don't want anyone else to have you.
What if your next relationship the guy is way better in bed than the last guy, maybe bigger, better at sports, makes more money.
It's OK for them to move on, but not you.
Kind of an ego thing.

[Izzy_3991]

I thought as much.
It's like they popped up their leg, peed on you (dog style) and marked their territory even though they walked off/are now your ex.

[Fireguy17]

@Izzy_3991 yeppers, he had his chance and screwed it up, so move on.

[Izzy_3991]

Exactly! 👏🏻

[Moose304]

Why was this question so one-sided? In all honesty some of the most outrageous behavior I have noticed after a breakup has come from females. Now, as to what the better question is why do PEOPLE get jealous the answers to this question can be complex. I do agree with what 8UniquelyBoring8 said, took the words right out of my mouth!

[Asker]

You only say that because you’re male. If you were a female you’d see more of the poor behaviour in men. This is not gender specific, it is a question based on my experience which is the whole point of this site…soooo back to the question at hand.

[Moose304]

I'm saying it because it is the truth. I did not say ALL outrageous behavior was by females. I said SOME OF IT WAS! Your question was lopsided because you seem to want to pin all the bad things on men. BOTH men and women do this BS! For the record. I have seen where females have keyed cars. I have seen them destroy expensive gaming equipment. I was invited last year to a man's home after his ex used a key she had made to enter his apartment and destroyed a full flight simulator. Thousands of $$$ worth of things were destroyed. I know of several situations where an ex attempted to get men fired from their jobs. I have seen them stalk and otherwise harass men and their new girlfriends. This bullshit is NOT gender specific and that is the problem in my opinion with your question! You make it sound like male jealousy is somehow different than female jealousy.

[RHK36]

Because the exes you have are dogs. Dogs are territorial. Better question is how do you know they get jealous... why interact with exes that are that way still... when will you pick better men instead of dating the same trashcans. When will women become accountable for their own bad picks, poor choices and on top of that keep those guys around.

[Asker]

You assume too much in knowing so little about the situation. Life is not black and white and nobody is perfect.

[Danny_dan92]

It’s not jealousy, it’s more like a sense of fear due to their position in the relationship being threatened

[Asker]

Can you elaborate… do you mean because he feels less able to return if she has other men interested?

[spartan55]

Who cares why? Why do you even entertain that? I'd laugh him out of the building and remind him he's with someone else.

[Nikki1989]

It is just sour grapes, basically.

[catiecatie]

Exes are dumb I’ll admit that. Don’t worry about them. Just live your life and they will regret it.

[provokeesmokee]

Lmao, don't know and don't care.
He's an ex. He can get as salty as he wants, who the fuck cares.

[Anonymous]

For the same reason ex girlfriend's and wife get angry when other women show thier exes attention.

[Asker]

Possessiveness? Feeling like somebody is taking what was once yours, even though you want them to be happy?

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah, that's it 😆

[robocop666]

he would be more jealous if you gave them blowjobs