Am I just a booty call?

[carlyd1015]

We have got over six years worth of history with each other. We’ve been together and apart during those years. We aren’t together right now because of distance, but have been incredibly open about our mutual feelings towards each other. We’re pretty much in constant communication and whenever he comes home we see each other and usually have sex.

[Oliverlogan263]

It's hard to say for sure based on the limited information, but there are a few possibilities:

• Booty call/friends with benefits: The fact that you're not together due to distance but still communicate frequently and have sex when you see each other fits the profile of a casual, intimacy-focused dynamic. However, you've mentioned mutual feelings, so there may be more to it.

• Complicated relationship: After 6 years of an on-again, off-again dynamic, your relationship has likely evolved in complicated ways. You may have an emotional connection and mutual feelings, but practical obstacles are keeping you from being in a traditional romantic partnership.

• Undefined situation: Without clearly defining the relationship or discussing expectations, people often fall into a gray area where it's unclear what type of relationship they actually have. You seeing each other and having sex when he's home may just be the default without consciously designing it.

• Potential for more: Given your history and mutual feelings, there could be untapped potential for a more serious relationship down the line if/when circumstances change. But for now, convenience and companionship may be guiding your interactions more than a desire for a committed partnership.

To get clarity, I recommend talking with him openly and honestly. Ask what the relationship means to him. Share what you want and need to feel fulfilled. Listen without judgment, and see if you can find a compromise that works for you both. Communication is key to defining or improving any dynamic.

For now, focus less on the "booty call" label and more on whether your current dynamic meets your emotional and physical needs. Go from there in deciding if this is enough for you or if you want more from the relationship. I hope this perspective helps! Let me know if you have any other questions.

[Anonymous]

Yes you are. Chances are he’s seeing someone else on the side wherever he is. He just butters you up by telling you what you want to hear so you’ll drop your panties for him whenever he’s back in town.

[coachTanthony]

Yes the booty is priority I am afraid.

[rm_llort]

He's probably telling you what he thinks you want to hear. Reciprocating to get what he wants from you (that's only sex by the way). He probably has another girl (s) where he lives and tells them all the same things.

[carlyd1015]

Jesus, you sound like a dick. I’m not unaware of how guys actually are, I’ve dealt with others other than this one. And, unlike you apparently, he’s actually matured and has grown up from the boy that was like what you just described. We’re not exclusive. And both have been open and honest about our endeavors with other people.

[rm_llort]

You asked for an opinion from strangers and didn't like it. You then attack me personally for it. The only dick here is you. You talk about maturity objectively you've opted to be the immature one here.

[carlyd1015]

It wasn’t what you said. In fact, I was expecting an answer like yours. It was the way you said it. I agree that the truth hurts sometimes, but you were kind of rude and not very sympathetic. If you have daughters, I feel really bad for them.

[rm_llort]

You were expecting a response like mine, and complain when you get it. I was "kind of rude". You were in fact rude and rude again. You want to bait people and complain when you get a bite. It is your loved ones I pity. I won't have to interact with you ever again, they do.

[Dkc123]

What's wrong with booty calls. Both the parties have fun in it.

[carlyd1015]

I don’t mind it much. Like, I said. Whenever we’re together we don’t just have sex. We actually hang out, get food, or do something and then go home and fool around. We’re being safe, having fun, and keeping each other on the hook until we’re ready to be officially together again. 🤷🏼‍♀️

[Dkc123]

But is he thinking of being official with u? Or only u? That's what I was getting...

[carlyd1015]

Yeah, I think so. I’m not completely planning on it or tying myself down to someone who isn’t even here right now. He’s doing the same. We’re both keeping our options open and actually had a conversation about the future when he was here the other night.

[OddBeMe]

Well friends with benefits and booty calls could over lap. But you def not his main squeeze.

[Anonymous]

Sounds like it. Six years is a long time to make something of it. Doesn't sound like you have.

[LazerBean]

Yeah.

[SnowedIn]

Lol simplicity of answer and truth.