Am I wrong for wanting to be alone in a relationship?

Question

The person I am dating is more clingy than I expected. They expect to come over my house every night. To the point they’d text me ‘I’ll let you know when I’m here.’ I don’t mind but I like my personal space. They don’t work currently due to lay off so they’re bored all day. Every time I tell them I’m ok for a night alone they get defensive. Why can’t some understand a relationship doesn’t have to be 25/8 under a person. Besides we can always talk on the phone. Am I wrong?

Summeroflove · Accepted Answer

Yeah. Take some time off and find who is right for you. People are different some people need more attention and some want to be left alone. It’s more compatibility then “clingy”. Everyone has a balance. Of needing attention to a extent but also not want someone glued to them all the time.

You communicate and aren’t respected. Maybe it’s time to find someone different. Some people don’t respect your personal space or time.

Absolutly talking on the phone is fine. But some people don’t have good boundaries there. Texting and calling T 3 am just to have a conversation. I mean if there is a emergency. That’s one thing

OlderAndWiser · Accepted Answer

It is not a matter of right or wrong. It is simply a matter of your preferences and his preferences are not compatible. So why do you continue this relationship?

laly520 · Accepted Answer

u aren't wrong u deserve some personal space n time for urself

Fireguy17 · Answer

I cannot handle someone that is clingy.
I need someone that is independent and can function on their own.
I'm gone form home quite often and work out of town a fair amount in the summer, so I just don't have the time nor the energy to hold someone's hand all day long.

CaliWildcard · Answer

You should never feel wrong for the things that make you, you! Knowing this, it would be best to let the other person know and if it doesn’t work out with the current individual, it would be wise to find someone who shares this preference in the future or at minimum is understanding and accepts it. If they truly love You, they should be understanding and honor it. Relationships typically require a certain amount of give and take in the areas that contrast wants and needs, so if they are willing to give You space, I feel that You should periodically hangout with them on days that You don’t feel like it. Lastly, never change who You are unless it’s because You want to change, doing so tends to backfire later, eventually leading to a breakup.

lightbulb27 · Answer

some do, he's got issues. sometimes it's the clingy woman. he's extreme. have to find out what is the root cause of his issue rather than deal with the surface need. may not like being alone.

its better than him playing video games all day though. he should be so exhausted from looking for a job.

definitely a sign of caution... not healthy.

OddBeMe · Answer

No my wife and I sit in different rooms occasionally. Lots of times on different iPads watching our own shows. We do like the same things and talk about and share shit. So similarity is still of import. But how your together will change with technology.

So many people snap pics of couples sitting in restaurants on their phones as a bad sign. Not sure that it is.

hahahmm · Answer

Just be honest. Say, "I like to be alone." You may be afraid of saying that because they could dump you or not like it but that's life. If you aren't compatible it will eventually be a problem, whether now or later.

Yannae · Answer

Hard to answer. From my point of view it's wrong, because I want to marry and if I can't stand being around her everyday, she's not the woman I should be with.

TheSpaceGnome · Answer

Meh, I'd prefer a woman who wants to spend all our time together.

If a woman needed a break from me, or I needed a break from her, I'd see it as us not getting along well enough to be in a relationship.

boggboss · Answer

U got with a clingy person then don't like that they are clingy learn to set boundaries or get use to it

exitseven · Answer

No, you are not wrong. Every one is different and having him be unemployed does not help.

ProbablyClueless · Answer

It's not unreasonable to want space. Just enforce that boundary with your partner. Don't be rude about it, just be firm and don't let him guilt you into relaxing the boundary.

Anonymous · Answer

lol now you know how a lot of men feel when it comes to women who want to text every second, call them, be w them, etc, etc. No you’re not wrong. He may be his own demise.

KrakenAttackin · Answer

"They, them"... Are you dating a mentally ill wokey?

JacobJordan · Answer

That is generally a fast track to being single but it doesn't make it wrong

jahaims · Answer

When I'm in a relationship I am okay with being around my partner. I can do the same things if they are or aren't around so why does it matter?

Staximus · Answer

What is this "they" bullshit? Is it a man or a woman? Grow a spine and just say it.

CozyCoffin · Answer

No. Just tell him you'd like some alone time.

SotiCoto · Answer

Alone time is important. Anyone who doesn't respect that is trouble.

BoopBoopBeep · Answer

You need to learn to set boundaries.

ChicoFromThe305 · Answer

25/8 💀 Bootleg 24/7 😂

jaskin777 · Answer

Nah u ain't t wrong

Heolurt · Answer

At least you're able to get in a relationship.

BarryLiverstone · Answer

Gotta have a balance

Am I wrong for wanting to be alone in a relationship?

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Am I wrong for wanting to be alone in a relationship?

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