What kind of trauma could I be holding on to that has made all my relationships unsuccessful?

[Gypsycowgirl73]

[D_Bone_Steak]

You'd have to go into way more detail than that for me to try and figure it out. Like, what exactly are you doing that's fucking up your relationships? It might be the choices in men (which is you), it could be you and certain patterns of behavior you haven't let go of... and so on. You might want to ask yourself a set of questions...

What have I been picking out of men?

What have I been doing to drive them off?

Why am I doing that?

... and so on.

This is not a simple problem, and a simple question isn't going to get much more than simple answers. You'll have to go deeper than the question stated. And, this might be part of the problem.

Think about it... you posed the question as if you haven't thought about it... at least deep enough to pose some possible reasons or even behaviors that is causing this. But at least you're asking and the first part to solving any problem is figuring out what the fuck the problem is to fix.

[D_Bone_Steak]

Thanks AI Bot for the MHO equivalent

[lightbulb27]

All sorts and any kind. Trauma a lot of times gets disguised as "that's how it is and whom I am"... based upon how your personality experienced the emotional situation. That can include curses and oaths you put on yourself or others imposed.

It shouldn't be "that hard" to figure out what's going on by looking at the patterns you experienced.

[rosemilk]

not sure. could be anything. not sure what kind of relationships were made as a model for you growing up. you'd need to go to a therapist to really see what changed you

[sheikalana]

I believe this is something only a psychologist could diagnose. Maybe is not a trauma maybe is your personality. Could be a number of reasons.

[Ironic_Method]

1. It may not necessarily be trauma. There are plenty of people who can't manage a relationship even without it.
2. The type you like might not normally be compatible with the person you are.
3. Generally if your relationships have not been successful, there should be common themes as to why.
4. Most people are incompatible, sometimes it just takes time. Learning how to vet people is a good skill to have so you don't waste more time and energy.

[JacobJordan]

You tell us. If you have repeated bad relationships either you suck at picking dudes, you are attracted to shit dudes or you push away good people. Only you can figure out which is true and how to fix it

[Flatmanlewis]

There are all kinds of trauma but the truth is you know and only you know. If you’re having a hard time locking that down then I’d strongly suggest professional counseling. It helps.

[mementomorii-]

Maybe a man treated you badly in the past and you thought and believed that every man you meet could be bad, and that's why your relationships failed.

[Anonymous]

You look pretty enough to be my second wife.

[Yannae]

Why would it be trauma? If you don't know yourself, it might just be a flaw you need to work on or flaws from your partners, being incompatible. Relationships are hard, regardless of trauma.

[boggboss]

What problems tend to come up constantly from your relationships

[KrakenAttackin]

Only you can know. It may not be trauma but the type of men you are drawn to.

You can change the types of people you are attracted to but it takes conscious effort.

[SolitarySolace]

I'll tell you what everyone is telling me constantly. It's your fault because you're choosing the wrong people to get with.

[ProbablyClueless]

Could be some issues of self worth from childhood.

[andreasderjuengere]

As YOU suggest "trauma":
examine your childhood :)

[Unit1]

How are we supposed to know?

[Anonymous]

I don't know. You must know.

[Twalli]

Impossible for us to know

[Anonymous]

Well that's vague.

[exitseven]

Maybe abandonment?

[riverrat3]

Fear of being loved