My boyfriend high five a random girl while we were out. I have trust issues and expressed my feelings to him. Why would he do that?

[Anonymous]

Me and my boyfriend have been arguing for a while because of the white lies he told me about women in the past and recently. I now find it hard to trust him around women. I told him how I feel about the whole situation and I may want to end this relationship because of the lies. He told me he will work on himself and get my trust back by proving himself to me. We recently went out to a club with friends and he literally spoke and high five a random girl turning his back to me - it was roughly 10 mins after we walked through the door. I was very upset and he told me not to worry it meant nothing! But why would a man do it for no reason? I don’t understand the motive behind this gesture and a quick conversation? Can someone help and explain this to me please?

[SueShe]

You have more than simply trust issues. You have a huge psychological problem and it seems that everyone is either a potential compulsive liar or a woman waiting for you to turn your back to steal your boyfriend.

If a simple gesture like a high five is enough to cause panic attacks, then you will only succeed in causing such a conflict with your boyfriend that he will slowly distance himself from you. What you want to achieve with your behavior is simply put total control over him.

Next, he will not even be able to look at people on the street because you will panic thinking that he is cheating on you. The result will be that he will find himself under your yoke and that he will not be able to be himself.

You really need to check why you react the way you do and what YOU can do to solve YOUR problem. Good luck.

[Asker]

I am telling you what I can, to get the best possible advice. I am not going to share my whole relationship story with the world. If I told my full story I would be judged and even now I am still judged lol can’t get away from it. I am not a controlling person and I don’t panic over my boyfriend looking or talking to women. That’s why we are here! You don't know my boyfriend if anyone is controlling it would be him. I am simply seeking advice, not a psychological evaluation - u don’t know me or what’s happening in my relationship. All you’ve got to say: ‘ur overreacting or something simple’ I didn’t ask for an essay, for u to disrespect me. If a woman can steal my man, he ain’t my man and past that I don’t want him! I have my self worth. But seriously if you have nothing nice to say that’s your problem if from my post you picked up me being paranoid and claiming everyone is a compulsive liar I think you have psychological issues. Seriously check YOURSELF and read back what you wrote! Being rude for no reason / I guess you are just bored.

Good luck

[SueShe]

That is exactly the reaction I thought would come. Thanks for confirming.

[Avicenna]

If it was a random woman, it's much less worrisome

[Anonymous]

Massive overreaction on your part. Relax.

[Iron_Man]

Talk to him about this