Do you think your romantic/loving close relationships would be better if either one or both of you weren't with a chemicalized person on drugs/drinks?

[sage2021]

I noticed during my long life and dating guys that almost all of them either drank alcohol and/or did drugs of some kind or another. I noticed when I was married to my first husband, which neither of us drank alcohol or did any drugs, we didn't have fights/arguments but maybe once a year. I believe it's because we weren't chemalized and we were really there mentally for each other and understood each other.
My second husband used to smoke pot for breakfast, lunch, and dinner and then some. There is THC and other chemicals which made him a chemicalized person (I don't drink or drug myself) and that guy wore me out with his stupid arguing with me every single day.
In conclusion I think chemicalized people are harder to have a good relationship with. Someone who is straight (I don't mean sexually) see's the world differently and doesn't have the need to argue all the time.
It's just my own thoughts here from my own experience in life. So, please don't jump all over me. I am not judging anyone, just asking a generic question ok?

[Nice222]

I guess in general you are right. But I had one girlfriend who drank and we got along great. But once she decided to stop drinking I couldn’t deal with her at all her personality totally changed.

[Jamie05rhs]

I completely agree with you.

[NathanDavis]

I don't see how someone being a drug addict or an alcoholic person could make any relationship better...

now, drinking or smoking on occasion... this does not necessarily makes a person worst, for a relationship... this alone won't be a factor, it might be a problem if they drink or smoke to the point of bringing themselves under the influence and this combines with other factors that are bad for relationships

then you also have people who do not drink or smoke at all... but they still have other bad traits and behaviors that are a disaster for a relationship, lol

[sage2021]

@NathanDavis
Very true!

[FunkyMonkee]

Well, I'm not about to do that, again!! I had a couple paragraphs written out when I farted, or something and the computer went belly up and I lost it all! And, OF COURSE, it HAD TO HAPPEN RIGHT BEFORE I was finished!! So, I just wasted the last 50:00 of my life!!

[FunkyMonkee]

Basically, neither of us smoked, drank or drugged and we only had one major fight and a minor one in the 10 years we were together. Both happened within the first 4 years.

[sage2021]

@FunkyMonkee
I HATE IT when that happens!!!
It happens to me on GaG at least twice a week. All I do is move just a little bit, and poof, my 1/2 hour long opinion is gone and there is no way to retrieve it. 🤬🤬🤬🤬

[exitseven]

I dated a girl who drank a lot. She was probably an alcoholic. It was a lot of fun for a while but she used to get abusive mostly when she was drunk.

[slatyb]

Absolutely. I wouldn't date someone who abused drugs or drank to excess. You shouldn't either. Have you considered counseling to discover why you keep choosing such men? Are there no others for you to date?

[sage2021]

@slatyb
You mean like the one I married that didn't do drugs or drink? See, I married the one that didn't do those things. I found someone like you said I needed and I married that one.

[douride2]

Yes I had a partner & a friend like you mentioned. They were both hard to take some days.

[Surely]

I don’t do chemicals or smoke anything. I won’t accept any partners or even friends that do so. I believe that people who have used, in the past are responsible for some of today’s issues with the younger generation. Meaning their children.

[sage2021]

@Surley
You might be surprised at how many senior citizens smoke pot and do opiates and other drugs that aren't prescribed.
Yep, they sure still love their pot - still smoking it since they were teenagers. 🤷🏼‍♀️

[Surely]

@sage2021. I know in most cases the street versions are less expensive and probably better than the prescription ones!

[Surely]

If you up on the herbs. Which I am not. There are probably something out there that would take care of or even cure whatever ails you!

[DrPepper12]

As that former person I can say sober is more stable and doesn't destroy relationships. You deserve better if he is altered all the time.