When two people are dysfunctional (in their own ways) do they usually make each other worse or improve each other?

[Anonymous]

There are “co-dependent” relationships.

A hypothetical example is the woman is alcoholic and the man is a compulsive gambler. They tolerate each others major flaws because they know they wouldn’t be tolerated long by a sober person. But they also enable each other unfortunately.

Do these dysfunctional relationships ever oddly improve each other? Like the woman says “I want to go to AA and quit drinking” and the man says “I’m proud of you. I want to go to GA to quit gambling”. That is you get inspired by your partner getting their act together?

Just curious. FYI I am not in the type of relationship right now but I was 5 years ago (I cleaned up my problem on my own 3 years ago.)

[provokeesmokee]

Worse. Always worse.

Source: grew up with codependent parents. I hardly speak to them, now.

[Asker]

Yeah believe they get worse 95% of the time. But sometimes one person gets inspired to get their act together. When that happens the other person much get motivated to improve as well. But if they don’t a break up or divorce is coming.

I’m a recovering compulsive gambler myself. I had to make a personal choice to get my shit together. It was extremely hard because my ego doesn’t want the label “addict”. There is a stigma attached about it. But I tried to do it my way and that didn’t work well…at all. 2 years clean now with the help of GA.

[provokeesmokee]

Congratulations, my friend! That's a big deal and worth celebrating.

There's absolutely a slim chance of both getting better. I just find it easiest for myself not to associate with dysfunctional codependents. Also easier for them because they'll be very dissatisfied with me if they want me to reciprocate their dependence.

[jahaims]

How would putting two immature trauma driven people together help anything

[AI Opinion]

Exploring the labyrinth of love and dysfunction, aren't we? 😜 It's like asking if two left-footed dancers can win a dance-off. Unlikely, but not impossible!

In a world where relationship dynamics are as varied as the colors of a sunset, the co-dependency saga often plays out with both dramatic lows and inspiring highs. Co-dependent relationships, especially with substantial issues like addiction, tend to spiral downwards when both parties enable each other's vices. It's a bit like trying to swim with weights on; not exactly a recipe for success, right?

However, the plot twist comes when one person in the relationship straps on their superhero cape and decides to change for the better. Their initiative can indeed spark a light in their partner, inspiring a collective leap towards improvement. Imagine the alcoholic decides to embrace sobriety, and the gambler sees this as a wake-up call to face their own demons. It's like a rom-com where the protagonists find themselves through each other's eyes—adorable and touching but requires a lot of hard work and genuine commitment to script a happy ending.

While these transformations are possible and heartwarming when they happen, it's essential to remember they require ample support—emotionally, physically, and sometimes professionally. It’s not just about flying solo but about becoming a dynamic duo that supports each other's growth while navigating the complexities of their dysfunctional behaviors.

Kudos to opening up about your own journey of self-improvement. It’s a testament to the fact that while relationships can influence us, our inner strength and determination are the true heroes of our stories. Here's to finding and fostering healthy dynamics, one step at a time! 🌟

[LazerBean]

Always worse