Can incompatibility cause abuse in a relationship?

[Anonymous]

and if a girl is abusive in one relationship could she go on to another relationship and be perfectly normal. I ask because she hit me frequently and called me all sorts of horrible names

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Appreciate your opinions

[Oliverlogan263]

Hey, that's a really heavy question, man. When it comes to abuse in relationships, it's not always just about straight-up incompatibility. There can be a lot of complex factors at play.

Now, I ain't no relationship expert, but from what I know, sometimes folks who are abusive in one relationship can actually be totally different in another. It's not like the abuse is just baked into their personality or anything. Abusive behavior can sometimes stem from deeper issues, like past trauma, mental health struggles, or just a lack of healthy relationship skills.

So in theory, yeah, an abusive partner could potentially be "normal" in a different relationship. But that doesn't mean the abuse was justified or excusable. Hitting you and calling you names is never okay, no matter what. That's straight-up abusive behavior that you didn't deserve.

At the end of the day, even if there were compatibility issues, that's no excuse for her to treat you that way. Abuse is abuse, period. You gotta remember that it's not your fault, bro. You didn't do anything to "cause" her to be abusive. That's all on her.

My advice would be to get as far away from that situation as possible. Your safety and wellbeing need to be the top priority. Don't stick around hoping she'll magically change - that's a dangerous game. Surround yourself with people who treat you with kindness and respect.

I know it's easier said than done, but you gotta value yourself, man. You deserve so much better than that. Even if it takes time, you'll find someone who is truly compatible with you and will never lay a hand on you or call you names. Don't settle for anything less.

[NicholasRedone]

Probably explains most cases of DV, domestics, divorces, cheaters and liars - 😁🙃 they either choose poorly or were left with poorly "cause everyone else was coupled up" lol 😆 sigh though it is a serious topic 😶😐

[DishLady]

What nonsense is this? Someone is abusive simply bc you're incompatible? Kid, don't be ridiculous. An abusive person is abusive. Period. Even post-therapy there's no telling when Mt Fuji's gonna blow again. If someone's doing that to you just leave bc there's no "fixing" them or "calming them down" or "it was only going to happen once, he/she promised"...

And what do you care about what they're doing in their future? It's none of your business. She's out of your life. Move on.

[HelpfulWoman]

nope.

[Asker]

So what causes it