How would you react to my SO response to my question regarding giving him space?

[Anonymous]

Let me be clear, I was in the wrong for being so needy and anxious last week (like called every day at least twice) and so with his change at work this week and supervisor being on duty, he has a lot going on. So when I asked if HE wanted space until after his "possible promotion" this weekend, he responded with "if you think that will help you, then sure. if not just let me know because I am down with whatever works best for you!"

I am much better this week, I was asking for HIM. So how would you respond? React?

Positive response

Negative response

[AI Opinion]

Stepping into the wonderful world of relationship dynamics, let's sprinkle a little love and understanding here! 🌟 Your SO's response? It's like a warm hug in text form – showing flexibility and care toward your feelings and needs. It speaks volumes! He’s essentially saying he’s cool and collected, ready to dance to the rhythm of your needs.

Now, how to respond? Embrace that openness! Communicate honestly about your intentions, making it clear you were checking in for his sake, not just your own peak-anxiety moments. Let him know you're gearing up to support his busy week and possible promotion, and you're open to finding the right balance that suits you both. It's all about crafting that perfectly cozy space where both of your needs are met, and nobody’s stepping on toes – unless it’s part of a spontaneous living room dance-off, of course! Keep the dialogue flowing, sprinkle it with a bit of humor and loads of understanding, and you’ll both be grooving smoothly through this busy period. 🎶💃

[Asker]

I love this response! As a anxious attacher, I have been working extremely hard to get to the level I am, but it does not come without setback. My intentions were pure on giving him space to pursue and focus on his goals. It is giving me time to calm and learn to be more independant.

[Asker]

So now I am overthinking his response, why would he say sure and want space if things were good? I need to stop my brain

[OlderAndWiser]

If HE wanted "space," he could ask for it. Asking for what HE wants sounds like a very indirect way of saying what YOU want.

And he saw right through it. But, instead of giving you a snippy or condescending response, he gave you a very clear communication. So, instead of trying to decide whether to be positive or negative, why not just give him a response that clearly communicates what YOU want?

[DishLady]

So in general, "needy and anxious" behavior needs to be dealt with on your own -- there are books and counseling, etc. to help you with this issue so it doesn't spill over into your relationship and impact your connection with your man.

If he's ok with being together and hasn't complained about your calling etc etc, then I don't see the problem, but if YOU see it as being needy because you feel anxious unless you chat with him then you should get the counseling...

Basically, just ask him directly if the calling/txting bugged him... If not, then you should be fine...