Why does the thought of being someone make me angry?

Question

The thought of being with someone doesn’t make me happy. In fact, I feel the complete opposite.
And no it’s not because “I haven’t found the right one.” I don’t care if it’s the right person, I just don’t want to be with them.
To be honest, being with someone would disturb my peace and happiness.

Telekinetic-Potato · Accepted Answer

Sounds like an issue with perspective that reminds me of an old folks tale about a cat chasing a mouse.

the mouse rounds a corner knowing it’s about to get caught as it’s out of breath. Then the mouse locks eyes with a big cow towering over him. Cow steps over the mouse takes a shit right on the mouse.

So then the cat rounds the corner and sees the mouse squirming in shit so the cat gently lifts the mouse out, helps the mouse wipe the shit off and then the cat eats the mouse.

Morale of the story is, the mouse was so anxious and stuck in a certain frame of mind, it ultimately hurt itself.

Sometimes in life things aren’t exactly what they seem but we’re to anxious, tired or frustrated to look at things in different ways. We get so locked into being negative about certain things because it takes a lot of mental fortitude sometimes to look at the bigger picture or just another perspective.

I don’t think your problem is you haven’t found the right one, it’s that you haven’t found the version of yourself that’s capable of having healthy relationships yet. And that is going to be a difficult but very rewarding journey should you decide to embark.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Chances are your experience in relationships is diametrically opposed to how they are perceived by and large. You just haven’t grown beyond anxiety to full on denial yet. People still have the gall to tell me that i’ll “find someone” now. Ell oh ell! Nope. First of all, i’m not looking. Sure, you CAN find something you’re not looking for, but how often does that thing out-value the thing you’re actually looking for? Almost never.

Some people believe in fairy tales. I did. Then they gave me anxiety. Now i deny their possibility. I’d tell you to hurry up and join me, but it’s not better here. People are still idiots and assholes about my choices to be single.

Damaged00 · Accepted Answer

Because you're scared. It seems to me like some have hurt you to the point of questioning yourself. You believe trying will disturb your peace meaning you expect it to go bad, expect to get hurt again. Sometimes we will do anything and everything to not feel like that ever again. Maybe you need to continue to be alone so you can fully heal and love yourself so that way no one can ever hurt you again. You won't care if they screw you over because you'll know your own worth.

Breanna_nonbinary · Accepted Answer

Why does it make you feel anything? If being by yourself makes you happy then do that. If being with someone makes you anxious then maybe that person isn’t right for you. Just because everyone else is in a relationship doesn’t mean you have to be. Don’t let the expectations of society dictate your standards of happiness.
You be you🙂💕

TheRealPepperPotts · Answer

Then don't be with someone. No one is forcing you.

HawkPerception · Answer

I've tried to share the pros of being in a relationship with you many times and I've tried to explain that not all guys are as bad as you perceive them to be. But I think I've seen enough of your posts. We get it. You're alone and bitter about men. Why do you feel the need to keep saying it? If you're happy being alone, then do that. Enough of the "Negative Nancy" nonsense.

imtiaz45 · Answer

The thought of being someone might make you angry due to various reasons, such as unresolved past experiences, personal insecurities, or unmet expectations. It could also stem from feelings of inadequacy or comparison, where you feel pressured to live up to certain standards or roles. Anger can be a defense mechanism masking deeper emotions like fear or frustration. Reflecting on the specific triggers and exploring these feelings with a trusted friend or therapist can help you understand and address the root cause, leading to healthier emotional responses and personal growth.

es20490446e · Answer

When you enter a relationship you feel very deeply connected to the other person. And maybe you struggle to manage that, or you need a specific kind of person that will complement you well.

For example I like computers, high intensity exercise, a very healthy lifestyle, and staying productive.

I feel that most people struggle to share my lifestyle, and they prefer something more social and less demanding.

So don't blame you, or the rest, for the lack of fitness. Just do what you like, and find someone who resonates with that.

Anonymous · Answer

Is it possible you’re mad that a lot of the men you wanted rejected you? Maybe not a lot of men wanted you at all. I don’t know. But rather than give it a chance you’re putting up this wall as a way to protect yourself from getting hurt. Here’s an example. When I meet someone I don't like them from the start. I do this because if we don’t become good friends or something I know that I never liked them to begin w.

Lynx122 · Answer

Why do you keep posting about this if you have what you want? If you think you'd be a bad partner and it would bother you to be someone then just live your life. Clearly something is on your mind or you wouldn't keep making posts about it.

Serkee · Answer

Do you feel like people are trying to pressure you to be with someone? Because other than that, I don't understand why the thought of being with someone would make someone angry. Nobody is forcing you into a relationship.

ProbablyClueless · Answer

Maybe there's a concern that if you were to find someone you want to be with, you're worried you won't measure up to their expectations?

LiamJHayden · Answer

Sounds like the perfect person for you would be someone who will leave you alone when you want to be, but will be available when you want someone around. I can relate to that.

dudeinohio · Answer

I can understand where another person in your life would disturb your sense of order. Maybe, you'd be happy living out your life alone. There are some people that are.

1073sucks · Answer

Work on yourself and find what you like to do in life. In the end nobody actually wants to be alone.

OhLongJohnsoning · Answer

Cause you like the attention of multiple people thats the only reason single people CHOOSE to remain single. THEYRE ATTENTION WHORES

Dongie · Answer

I know the feeling. I was like that when young. I felt like I wasn't good enough tho, for the ones I liked.

MrGSpotHer · Answer

Ye I agree but it's good to be able to complain to someone from time to time

NathanDavis · Answer

therapy

sirderpsalot123 · Answer

I don't know lol

worldscolide · Answer

Anxiety is a natural reaction.

Anonymous · Answer

Sashie ❤️

Why does the thought of being someone make me angry?

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