Better to be the nice guy or not?

[Jmpr760]

For many years I have been the "niceguy " to the women I'm in a relationship with opening doors ( even after being together 4 years later) , genuinely complimenting their appearance, even waking up earlier than I needed to, to start their car and warm it up before work, .. and much more , but it always seems the nicer , kinder , I am the less reciprocal they become.. do woman want to be treated poorly? , should I just treat them like rubbish? That's not the kind of person I want to be , but I'm tired of being treated poorly In Return for kindness , advice, insights anyone?

[DishLady]

It’s best to be “the GOOD guy” (not nice, not ornery, but simply moral and on-the-level).

[noohair]

I understand your dilemma. I have a standard that I treat all people with civility. I guess you thought that you could gain some affection by helping. I have fallen into that trap too. If I go out of my way for someone I expect respect in return. If I don’t get the respect I stop. If she asks what is wrong, say that she is an emotional vampire and wiggling her ass in your face won’t work anymore. Good luck bro.

[slatyb]

You keep picking the wrong women. Or the right women aren't picking you so you are settling for the rest. A counselor might be able to help.

After I directed and started dating every woman I dated for more than three dates was perfectly nice.

[slatyb]

Reading your post, your behavior is creepy. You aren't a good guy. You are passive-aggresdiveky trying trying to trade favors for ity sex. You aren't even taking the time to get to know these women. Learn to initiate a conversation. If she engages, pay attention to the woman instead of your dick. Then ask for a date.

[Jmpr760]

Wow , so judgmental , I guess I may not have been specific enough, these are women I was in a long term relationship with , I was raised to treat woman kindly and show love and respect , but after 6 mo to a year in they would not appreciate kind things I would do.. is wanting to be hugged kissed and have sex with my girlfriend unreasonable? Then I guess that makes me a creep.. how many men do you know still buy flowers for their girlfriend years in just cause?

[midnightmoon05]

Be a man with confidence not a nice guy. Nice guy gets walk all over… that’s what happened to you.
real man do good things for their partner also notice if there is no reciprocation… he then talks to her to have a better balance relationship. It’s never 5/50 and 90/10 will not last and 80/20 will not work.. be closer to both satisfaction

[AI Opinion]

Oh, the classic conundrum of whether to be or not to be the nice guy! Let's unravel this with a pinch of charm and a dash of insight. First off, treating someone like royalty doesn’t mean you should get walked over, and it definitely doesn’t mean women want to be treated poorly. Far from it! What's crackling here is something deeper—perhaps your kindness is coming off as trying a bit too hard or maybe it's not being perceived as genuine.

Remember, it's all about balance. Being kind and considerate should never come at the expense of your own self-respect or be seen as a transaction. Lovebomb alert: don't just do nice things expecting love in return. Instead, sprinkle your kindness with a little bit of mystery, maintain your boundaries, and show that while you're an absolute sweetheart, you're also your own person with your own life.

The trick is not to swing from nice guy to bad boy but to land somewhere in that spicy middle ground where you're genuinely nice because that's who you are, not because you're aiming to score points. Keep the doors opening, but also make sure those doors open both ways. 😉

[Selene1600000]

Being kind is not the problem. The issue is when kindness turns into overgiving, people pleasing, or doing everything while accepting little effort in return. Healthy relationships need both kindness and boundaries, so instead of treating women poorly, focus on choosing partners who appreciate you and stop chasing approval by constantly proving your value through acts of service.

[DOMINANT12]

little bitch kid, do what is right and be good. All humans have good and bad qualities, tendencies, etc. let the good be dominant, u little kiddo. Sometimes in life u will have to be stern and rough with those women and so-called women because there is a time and place for everything little bitch boy. Only Let GOD Control your actions. don't let anyone, especially a woman or so-called woman[sexist] control your actions little bitch kiddo. u are an idiot, foolish kid, among other bad, satanic things, for even asking a simple question like that; and u serious with it LOLZZZZ. Satan's little kiddo. Think b4 u talk kiddo. go seek some Spiritual, mental, emotional and moral help little bitch kid. u disturbed in the aforementioned.

[all u or others say is what y'all are, if y'all respond negatively/stupidily]

[Nikki1989]

Genuine nice guys are rare and therefore a real catch if you are lucky enough to find one.

[patrick994]

Some women especially the younger ones like the bad guy, the good guy they see too obvious, my advice is to be yourself, you can be good, however, don't let women take advantage or make fun of you.

[Anonymous]

I think it's best to be your authentic self. If that's a nice guy, then be that. It's pointless to be something you're not. Because you can't change who you are at your core. And you'll have to be the real you at some point. So might as well be that person from the start. This might turn off the majority of women, but that's ok! Because it will not turn off the QUALITY women.

[paledreams]

It's all about finding a submissive pretty petite somewhat shy 20s woman - who's neither strict nor slack ; who's neither a layabout or obsessed about schedules by the dot, by the dot emphasises 😆😆🧐😆

[HawkPerception]

To help yourself sleep at night, die without regrets, be a great partner, father, and overall kind person? Yes.

To get girls or get ahead in business in life? No.

[Serkee]

It depends. Would you rather be the person you want to be, or would you rather get what you want to have? Those two things rarely go hand in hand.

[DrPepper12]

Im the nice guy too and i too have been outraged by the lack of gratitude by women. That said, keep doing it and fuck the bad guys. Worry about you and keep that good karma coming!

[Static_In_The_Attic]

Don’t be a nice guy, don’t be a prick, be yourself.

[Skinhead-1979]

Being nice gets you much further than being an absolute Prat

[BarryLiverstone]

When you say they become less reciprocal, how much are you asking for them to do things?