Why are so many people nowadays into dark psychology?

[victoriaxoxo]

In the past five years, I've encountered numerous individuals who deliberately employ dark psychology techniques like manipulation, deception, gaslighting, and love bombing to control others. While manipulation isn't new, it seems to have become more mainstream recently.

I've met many men who actively consume content on how to manipulate people, trick women into sleeping with them, gaslight, and cheat. I've ended multiple relationships upon discovering my partners were into this dark psychology and tested these methods on me. One ex would watch hours of videos on how to psychologically hook and control people. He used to be sweet, but in his early 20s, he became obsessed with dark psychology, ultimately ruining our five-year relationship. Another guy I dated had a friend who read psychology books to learn how to use eye contact and target vulnerable people. This friend dated a mentally vulnerable girl while cheating on her because he believed she wouldn't leave. I witnessed him cheat on her during a night out and later mock her for being at home making him dinner (I did inform the girl eventually).

It feels worse now than ever. I struggle to find a genuine date without the guy trying to be strategic. Recently, I went on a date with an attractive guy who love bombed me, claiming we were a perfect match despite the awkward date. I saw through it, and the relationship never took off. Ironically, I would have liked him for his features, but his game-playing ruined everything.

This isn't to say women don't do this; my perspective is limited to dating men. However, the prevalence and intensity of these manipulative behaviours seem to have escalated. It is especially disturbing considering that nowadays sex is so easily available and most people are not entrapped in dead end relationships but this seems to not stop some people from trying to control others.

[Telekinetic-Potato]

What you're referring to is called machiavellianism and it's not a trend or new other than maybe to teach it in an organized way. The reason it's become necessary to do so is because these things used to be common sense.

In my opinion the details of that story are mostly about the fact that the family unit is not so prevelant anymore and without father's in the home to teach these things from a parental perspective the morals become ambiguous since a book is only going to list techniques.

The book 48 Laws of Power I think very beautifully touches on why you're seeing more and more people learn about these things as you get older.

The prequel to the first chapter explains that it's up to you what you use these tools for or even if you want to use them. Simply understanding them will help you identify them being used against you and how to defeat them because a lot of people manipulate, gaslight and play game without having to think about it.

Life is a game and it's up to you to learn the rules and make your move, you might think you have the moral high ground by refusing to take part but this is ultimately an incredibly arrogant outlook and doesn't change the fact that you're in the game whether you like it or not and if you're not playing than you'll be a victim to the people who are every time. And that's fair.

Deception, manipulation, gamesmanship, cheating. You'll find that the people who denounce these things the most are often the ones who hold positions in life that are infamous for benefiting from these practices.

At least once you're comfortable learning them, you'll have more control on exerting your own sense of morality on the world.

There's nothing wrong with manipulating and cheating someone who is trying to harm you. Sometimes we do these things to protect what we love.

The people who don't learn will always be foolish victims.

[victoriaxoxo]

And so I did actually sit there and read through that book, amongst others, after my last relationship. It’s just, I knew that there are some bad people who simply hurt others for kicks, I just didn’t think it will be that prevalent. When going into a relationship I usually have the best intentions but I found it to not be the case with some people (and a decent chunk). And of course there are others who are doing it defensively or going through their villain arc. I just feel like in the past relationships were less malevolent, and we have cheating statistics to back this. And is a father really required to teach people to not hurt others? It seems pretty common sense, I grew up with neither parents and I can’t say I ever felt confused about whether it’s morally right to cheat or manipulate someone.

[Telekinetic-Potato]

Maybe that's because when you grow up without someone you really look up to, moral ambiguity doesn't exactly work the same way.

[Anonymous]

You really don't want to hear the answer to this. You think you do. But it'll just make you angry.

Because a lot of guys don't start out this way. But then they learn they are invisible to most women till they learn to do this. Some guys stay this way because it's a means to an end. But the smart guys learn the reality that most women are actually quite toxic. That's why this works. But even when he wins he finds out the prize he wins is no prize at all.

This is what's unfortunate about this world anymore. Most women, most people do not want a partner anymore. They want a fan, they want tribute, they want somebody to just fawn over them. And when they're done they're done. This is why so few men invest in women anymore. They know it's ALL just temporary.

[victoriaxoxo]

I really don’t share this view from my personal experiences. All of my girlfriends are very relationship driver but most of them have been cheated on multiple times by different guys. More of often than not the guy has never been cheated on himself and gets enough female attention. These guys brag about cheating to their friends and often enough listen to rap music which also encourages this sort of behaviour. A few other guys have trauma themselves and are constantly on the defensive where they pre-cheat in the relationship just in case the girl ever might.

As a woman I have never encountered a man who managed to trick me into liking or sleeping with him. This decision is made within the first few seconds of knowing each other based on physical attraction, even then some guys will still start playing mind games so unnecessary.

Do you have some real life examples?

[Opinion Owner]

I see. So what you're telling me is you and your girlfriends are just terrible at recognizing quality men. That was simple. Problem solved!

[Opinion Owner]

Sorry, you friends. Not you.

[victoriaxoxo]

Admittedly one of my friends definitely is. She dated the same guy in different fonts. A couple of them even look so similar that they might be related. She also once dated a guy who cheated on her and then dumped him and proceeded to date his friend who then also cheated on her (key indicator being, the guys stayed friends the whole time lol).

The other one isn’t bad, she just comes from a religious background and since they are married she feels locked in (I do feel like she will leave but it will take a while longer).

Regardless, an awful lot of bad apples out there and guys with predatory mindset. Is it so bad on the other side?

[Opinion Owner]

Yes. But the difference is women have the advantage of being picky whereas men do not. Also most women predators are aggressive. Every rotten woman I've ever met has approached me. I think that's an easy trap for a guy to fall into. That is the advantage men have here though. Most rotten women a guy can wait out.

[MzAsh]

Men are particularly into this because it’s the only way they can compete with other men for women, and it’s the only way men can compete with women for sexual power. With us ladies, this kinda stuff comes natural.

[Anonymous]

Too many woman find serial killers fascinating. It's odd.

[AI Opinion]

Aim: Offering insights into the rising fascination with dark psychology.

It's quite the puzzle, isn't it? Dark psychology and its shady techniques like love bombing, gaslighting, and the art of manipulation seem to have taken center stage in the modern dating drama. It's like a twisted version of courting where the goal posts have moved from genuine connection to psychological warfare. But why this sudden lust for control and deception?

Well, the digital age has thrown open Pandora's box, giving everyone access to information that was once hidden or taboo. The internet is like a buffet of psychological tricks and tips, serving up strategies on a silver platter. It's become a game of who can play the system best, with some treating relationships more like a chess match than a romantic encounter.

This rise in manipulative behavior might also reflect a deeper societal shift towards valuing power and success over ethics and empathy. Some see manipulation as a tool to navigate through life's challenges, mistaking control for competency. Unfortunately, this often leaves a trail of emotional chaos and broken hearts.

Ironically, this strategy backfires more often than not. Genuine connections are built on trust, respect, and authenticity, not manipulation and deceit. So, for those weary of the dark psychology playbook, take heart. There's still plenty of room for real love and meaningful relationships. It might just mean sifting through more frogs before finding a prince or princess who values the beauty of a genuine connection. And remember, the best defense against manipulation is a strong sense of self and a clear understanding of your boundaries and values. Keep those shields up, warriors of love!

[Kaneki05]

Your problem is thinking this wasn't always the way lol.

[ProbablyClueless]

It seems to validate their more toxic behaviors.

[MicahRaine]

Because people without religion turn evil

[noohair]

Machiavellianism dates back to the 1500's.

[Bklynbadboy12]

I don't know that shit is creepy