What counts as cheating?

[CuriousHubby]

There are many types and degrees of cheating so what counts for you?

What if your girlfriend liked you attracting other girls and reading the texts you share?

Would your feelings change if she had a medical problem and could not perform?

To much attention is cheating

Emotional cheating ends relationships

Only physical cheating counts

Any time you list it's cheating

It's cheating even if they are on again off again

If they are talking with the opposite sex for a big amount of time it's cheating or will be soon.

[Summeroflove]

I would say the minute anything is sexual and/or romantic. You can talk to someone all day long And it not be anything sexual or romantic. You can do a lot of things. But as soon as it crosses that line it’s cheating.

People know what their intentions are even if they try to excuse it to make themselves look better or play it off as innocent enough maybe even to feel better about it themselves. Cheating is cheating.

[CuriousHubby]

What if your lover wants a third in bed and likes it sexual?

[Charles_]

No, only her

[RavVid]

About the best definition i have seen is if you are doing something you would not want your partner to know about fully. And if you are asking if it is cheating then it is.

Even "harmless" flirting. People who flirt are significantly less happy with their partners. Which is the horse and which is the carriage i guess is debatable. Attention seeking and validation falls within this and is broadly advertising the goods.

It is possible a partner might like his/her partner getting attention. I guess if t is with the full knowledge and approval of partner it is ok.

A few times here and I know one case in real life of a spouse telling their partner they are going on a dirty weekend and it is not cheating because they have told them. It may not be cheating in the sense of hidden infidelity but it is still infidelity and that is the real issue.

[CuriousHubby]

Well put

[RavVid]

Yeah I was impressed by that definition - a woman gave it by the way.

[Elliegirl]

Obvs if he’s sleeping with someone else, assuming there isn’t any agreement beforehand, it’s cheating. Emotional cheating may be less severe than physical (only maybe), but still counts. The short version is if one person is violating the other’s trust and seeking fulfillment, other than the need for guy time or girl time, outside of the relationship, it’s cheating.

[CuriousHubby]

Being filled by someone emotionally too not just physically for you?

[Elliegirl]

Yes.

[nativemoonchild777]

I left my husband for posting adds on Craigslist and talking to another married woman about our marriage problem's. That other woman was his friends wife in the marriage who was also my friend and I was done

[CuriousHubby]

That would so end it! Would you be mad if he was doing the same here?

[worldscolide]

Eww Craigslist freaking gross, you dodged a bullet by leaving him.

[nativemoonchild777]

lol I sure did girls. I sure did. Now it’s made me super standoffish.

[AI Opinion]

Riding the waves of love and the occasional storm of doubt, huh? Cheating, oh that slippery slope, is more than just a physical dance with someone not your partner. It's about breaking trust, whatever form that may take. For me, it dances along the lines of emotional and physical betrayal. If my partner's cheering me on from the sidelines while I'm flirting in texts, I'd say it's all about the boundaries we've set. As long as we're playing by the rules we both agreed on, then we're in the clear.

Now, if she's facing medical issues, that's where the depths of our emotional connection are really tested. Would my feelings change? Love isn't just a physical connection; it's the emotional tie that binds. If anything, challenges like these can bring us closer, shining a light on the strength of our bond. Remember, love is about supporting each other through thick and thin. 💌💪

[AviatorTom]

Cheating is any time an average person believes that what you are doing is wrong. It covers a wide gambit, including: having sex with someone who's not your partner, copying someone's answers on a test, not declaring all your income when you file income tax, and many more.

[Nerdvana]

Cheating is about secrecy and betrayal of trust.

1. I think cheating is when you do something with another person, and you don't want your spouse/partner to ever find out.

2. You have a relationship, that's more than just friends and you ignore your spouse/partner.

[CuriousHubby]

Hm good comment

[Iron_Man]

Cyber sex, phone, sex, or even talking about what would you do to each other on the phone or in person. foreplay, actual sex, kissing, and anything else sexual or in your window sexual stuff and also snuggling in the same bed together or on the couch or car or in the yard. Plus dry humping all that stuff is cheating and it ends right there in the spot If done

[Iron_Man]

And personal massage unless it’s done by a stranger professionally I could go on and on

[Iron_Man]

And holding hands and walking or even sitting down holding hands is cheating

[CuriousHubby]

Any contact or desire then right! No secret snap chats

[Iron_Man]

And trading nude pics or even one person sending them

[Sun_Kim-Ai]

For my wife and I, anything that we know the other wouldn't approve and we'd have to hide from each other.

[CuriousHubby]

What are some of those things? How do you tell when it's just friends and it's past being friendly?

[dragoblack]

Anything that goes against the agreed restrictions of the relationship. There are obviously default ones, (like having sex with and seducing/romancing someone else), but ultimately, you should talk with your partner.

[CuriousHubby]

Based on who you love

[Ms_Facesitter]

Anything you do when you're looking for a partner, when you already have one

[CuriousHubby]

Nice and simple

[Ms_Facesitter]

A simple rule, yet so easily broken :(

[CuriousHubby]

So easily rationed away too

[missindiana93]

When you have to hide your phone is cheating already.

[CuriousHubby]

Ooo good point ! 👉

[Unit1]

To me it's when a girl treats someone else just like a boyfriend if not more than that.

[CuriousHubby]

If they treat them like senpai

[Unit1]

Yeah, that's certainly one way to put it. Either i'm their senpai/boyfriend or i'm not 😏

[CuriousHubby]

Right! Dude 😎

[worldscolide]

To me, anything you do that you'd feel the need to hide from your significant other, that you've done with the opposite sex is cheating, be it emotional or sexual.

[Anonymous]

If my girlfriend liked me attracting other girls that'd be HOT! Especially if she looked that good laying back on the bed and reading them!

[CuriousHubby]

Probably not of guys and girls fantasy

[Radiate143]

Any action with the intent to draw nearer to someone outside of your relationship in a romantic way.

[TheLovelyIntrovert]

Everything you posted isn't OK in a relationship.

[CuriousHubby]

True but some bad relationships have it

[Twalli]

It depends on what you consider cheating. Not you, meaning the one engaging, but you meaning the partner of the one who may be in the cheating stage.

[DishLady]

All the above.

[LiamJHayden]

Cheating is, in practice, whatever the partner thinks it is.

[CuriousHubby]

So she could have 3 husbands but if he prizes the 1st most of all and feels he is being loyal to her by not loving the others as much. That could be not cheating?

[LiamJHayden]

You missed it completely. "Cheating is whatever the partner thinks it is." applies to the actions of the partner, not to one's own self judgment.

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

@LiamJHayden
I'm intrigued here, the implications are not clear to me. Can you elaborate, please?

[Ladsin2]

What's list in option D

I'm pretty damn close to if she talks to another man it's cheating and

[Vegasrunner]

For men not providing for their partner for women, making themselves available

[CuriousHubby]

Some women take care of Thier men though with providing.

[Vegasrunner]

@curioushubby TY for sharing, I'm not sure what that has to do with the question though.

[Charles_]

I need female contact. I love eating and sucking pussy

[Kelley1]

If he is a top 1% man, it is not cheating.

[CuriousHubby]

One percent of?

[HawkPerception]

So you're saying a top 1% man can sleep with whoever he wants in a relationship?

[Kelley1]

@HawkPerception The top 1% are young hot guys with high incomes such as movie stars and NBA players who have access to gorgeous young women. If a woman is fortunate enough to marry a top 1% guy she must accept the fact that he will occasionally have sex with gorgeous young women. That comes with the territory.

[HawkPerception]

@Kelley1 Fortunate to be with someone who sleeps with others? I think our definitions of fortunate are very different.

[Kelley1]

@HawkPerception However, you are not one of the tens of millions of young women who would jump at the chance to marry an NBA player or movie star, knowing full well that they will sleep with others. Since you are not a female, your opinion doesn't count.

[Kelley1]

During the Joseon ( kingdom of Korea that existed for 505 years) all the 100+ beautiful palace maids were the king's women. Most never did, but they were extremely fortunate if the king bestowed his favor by sleeping with them because it would raise their status from level 9 to a special lady and the extremely lucky concubines would be elevated to level 3.

8,000 Years Ago, 17 Women Reproduced for Every One Man.
psmag.com/.../
That happened because the fortunate women preferred to sleep with the top men who would sleep with many women.

[Kelly6]

@curioushubby Physical sex

[DrPepper12]

Yup!

[PsychicBoobs]

if you can pay for it, it's cheating.

[CuriousHubby]

So if I order soap it's cheating?

[jackieistired]

Talking to another girl flirty

[art84]

Anything done in secret is cheating.

[Brady]

Anytime u list it's cheatin

[DrPepper12]

It requires physicality.

[Crimsyjo]

So you don't agree with emotional cheating being cheating?

[DrPepper12]

No. It's flirting, potentially with intent to act. It's a signal of a crisis in a relationship but not cheating.

[Crimsyjo]

Very interesting! I'd like to believe it. Cos in that respect I could still say I've never cheated in my life...

[DrPepper12]

That's great! Me neither!!

[CuriousHubby]

Just practice flirting huh?

[DrPepper12]

Sure!

[Crimsyjo]

Practise makes perfect! 😄

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

I'm interested as well, what makes you discard the emotional part here, doc?

[DrPepper12]

I'm really not a jealous person
I think monogamy

[DrPepper12]

I think monogamy is a recent artificial construct and our true nature is to be polyamorous.
I adhere to the French view of infidelity, it's a minor regrettable lapse not an unforgivable sin.

[Crimsyjo]

I am a jealous person and men I go out with tend to be jealous and i like it. I like the idea that if you love someone your are their no1 and they are mine.
I've no issue with having multiple partners. But there is no love in those things. And that's fine if you are happy to live with only physical needs being met. Food, drink, sex, touch, sleep.
I crave deeper meaning tho...

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

French view of infidelity? Errr what is that lol

[Crimsyjo]

@Maybe_Maybe_not hahaha I did think of you when he said that 😂

[CuriousHubby]

Lol yup and wow every one is still commenting

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

Yeah lol, I want to know what French have to do with infidelity? Come back pepper!

[DrPepper12]

You only have to Google it!

www.google.com/search

[Crimsyjo]

This thread still going? Wow 😄

[DrPepper12]

Lol I thought so too!!

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

Plus, doc refuses to talk about french, he sent me to google instead 🥴

[Crimsyjo]

@Maybe_Maybe_not I'm not arguing against DrPeppers view, experiences or opinion but for me personally... I dislike any article that has such all-emcompassing statements such as "The French are..." or "British people believe..." which is no better than the "Guys don't think..." and "all girls are" statements frequent on here. Even with research and studies that "back up" such claims the question is how was the study conducted? How many people asked? Where were they found from? If you as an example asked 100 people found from a porn site and a 100 people who were asexual you would get extremely different views on questions about sex and pleasure.
I understand the concept of statistically applying results to general population. But it's always better to say "in my opinion" or "in my experience" ... to soften such statements lol

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

@Crimsyjo yeah really it's typical from British people to bring relativity in such simple topics. When everything should be so simple and straightforward. Annoying Brits damn.

[Crimsyjo]

@Maybe_Maybe_not haha 😄 Typical of French people to hate on brits. All of you just think you are right all the time. And think you're the most romantic in the world!
c'est la vie!

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

@Crimsyjo What hate, you started with your protestant stuff when we were happy catholic, you brought chaos in Europe. And you created Jellies ! 😆

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

And even worse, because of you USA has been created !! 🤣

[Crimsyjo]

@Maybe_Maybe_not oh noooo!! You blame us for the Americans? 😱

Haha... in my experience... and opinion... I love Americans LOL. Most of the them 😂

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

@Crimsyjo You forgot to say we have real cheese when all you have is stupid orange cheddar :p

[Crimsyjo]

@Maybe_Maybe_not haha I may have thought it. But it's not sarcastic or insulting if it's true lol

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

@Crimsyjo Thank you for your participation in this fake drama xD

[DrPepper12]

@Maybe_Maybe_not.
@Crimsyjo.
Do I need to separate you too? Do you need a channel or something?

https://frenchly.us/dating-married-frenchman/

The difference, as Jo Piazza points out in "How to be Married", is that only 47 percent of the French say that infidelity is unacceptable in a marriage compared to 84 percent of Americans.

Why such a stark difference? It has a lot to do with (no surprise) the French mindset around seduction and sex. What has astonished me the most is their ability to separate desire from love from monogamy. This is, I believe, what has kept my relationship with my older French lover within a set perimeter.

www.pewresearch.org/.../

www.google.com/.../

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

It's okay Crimsy and I have stopped the wars, look there is even the Eurostar !

Ah so it's based on studies, interesting data, thanks Doc !

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

... And I bet there is a correlation with religion presence, looking plausible

[Crimsyjo]

@Maybe_Maybe_not were we at war? Haha. I'm bowing out now so whoever wants the last word...
au revoir et adieu mes amis. à bientôt sur un autre post

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

Adieu mes amis then, music has the final word:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aU-dKoFZT0A

[Crimsyjo]

@Maybe_Maybe_not ❤️❤️❤️

[jahaims]

Anything you won't do in front of your s/o

[Flower2006]

Dick in pussy

[OddBeMe]

Intent.