Long distance relationship. What should I do?

[Anonymous]

This guy I’m talking to is the male version of me. He also admitted that i’am the female version of him. We instantly clicked and liked each other so much that within 3 days, we were already deeply in love, already exchanging words of affirmation and know everything about each other. What I like about him, and that is something that no guy has given me, is that he’s so reassuring and supportive. He understands me without my need to explain anything, without the need to utter a word. Despite his age, 2 years younger than me, he’s incredibly mature and takes communication religiously. But, since I also care about physical looks, and financial state, I’m …a bit conflicted. Emotionally, he feels like the perfect match, understanding, reassuring, and deeply connected to me in a way no one else has been. But I can’t ignore the fact that physical looks and financial stability also matter. I find myself wondering whether these aspects will align with my long term expectations. He tells me over and over that he would love to marry if things were different. He also tells me to not to worry, (cause the topic of marriage scares me) that he doesn’t mean it, and that we will never meet because of our circumstances, (we live 2hrs away from each other but he’s going abroad in a few months). He can also be very, very possessive and with his words it feels like he’s manipulating me or a player, however when I mention that he starts to reassure me or speak with reasoning to why would he do that and so on.. calmly, which I also like. Sometimes I think I have Avoidant attachment issues due to how I act with him sometimes. Sorry I made this too long, please someone tell me what to do, I’m lost.

[ChicoFromThe305]

First you must know what you want, you must think future wise as well and he must be aware of it as well, y'all must remain on the same page, the issues you mentioned are flexible and can be later adjusted, in the aspects you've mentioned, that can be worked on, the hardest part is the emotional connection and the clicking with each other, if y'all get on the same page with the rest then that's good and y'all can make it work, the biggest issue you have here is basically when he backed up and said he never plans on meeting with you or whatever, that makes everything he says seem less genuine because it point more him just saying what you want to hear in the moment, he should at least have hope of y'all working things out in the future, if he knows y'all will never meet then that's not the best sign.

[Asker]

Exactly! I already know what I want, I’m not some kind of Golddigger. My mom and I are struggling financially and that’s my reason for wanting to marry someone who has a decent salary. It’s not just about me but it’s for me and my mom and my future kids. I want them to feel flexible and have everything they desire. But this guy I talk to doesn’t even have goal, he just told me he’s going abroad, he doesn’t go to university and never will cause he thinks it’s a waste of time. I do go, and I value my partner to have BA certificates and so on. He graduated high school for three years now and all he does is play video games.

And the way he’s always possessive, breaking boundaries, etc.. like he makes me so uncomfortable sometimes that I feel suffocated I start to question whether if he’s manipulating me or something. Like, I would tell him about an event that happened to me in the past that real broke me, and indirectly he would make fun of me about it. He made me cry four times, but then later when he’s done saying all those annoying things he tells me about one of his weaknesses and then proceeds to bombarde me about how much he loves me and that I’m the best girl he ever met blah blah blah…

[Cormac995]

If you keep aiming for perfect and pass up guys like this because the money isn't enough and he's not quite good enough you're going to be alone forever. There is no such thing as a prince charming there's just people who are some good some bad all flawed. If money and looks are so important that them not being a perfect fit makes you second guess a relationship you claim is this fulfilling, I think you're not mature enough to date and he's probably more mature than you.

[Amy10223]

Two hours apart isn't really that much of a loon distance relationship. I'm wondering what's keep you two from meeting in person, rather than via phone or mail or text. You always need to meet one another in person and see how you feel about someone then.

[Asker]

neither of us wants to meet the other yet we love each other. and we both know that this isn’t going to last. i try to leave every time but then get trapped with him once again. i know this is only an online relationship and it doesn’t matter much, but I’m not the person to just block someone. i love him, but sometimes i just want to leave him completely. I’m so confused.

[trumpetplayerforlife]

Me ans my husband lived 2 hours away from each other for the first year of our relationship ans one of us would drive uo once a week to see each other and we would just text all the time and call

[AI Opinion]

Hey love! Relationships, especially long-distance ones, can be a rollercoaster of emotions. 🤔 First off, it's awesome that you've found someone who so deeply connects with you emotionally. Sounds like he's been dropping some lovebombs here and there! But—watch out for red flags like possessiveness. 💃

You're wise to weigh how physical attraction and financial stability fit into your picture, and it’s okay to prioritize them. Since you’ve also noticed some possessive behavior, keep those eyes peeled for anything that doesn't sit right. 🧐 Remember to trust your gut and feelings. If you ever feel manipulated, take a step back, pause, and chat with him about it. It’s all about healthy communication, right? 💬

Trust yourself and take things at your own pace. You've got this! 😎

[moneymagnet24]

Whatever come fast go fast

[Ariesman81]

Jump