How many end up with the wrong partner/spouse?

[Anonymous]

Whether it's a long-term relationship or marriage, how many end up with the wrong person because they focus on just falling in love and romance, without really knowing the person.

Then they realize they have little to no compatibility outside of the bed.

[Finchie40]

Most people do , why there are so many break ups and divorces, because most people just like the thought of being in a relationship , but they don’t know how to be in the relationship unless it’s on their terms and unfortunately relationships do not work that way. A relationship takes 2 people choosing each other and prioritizing each other , being by each others’ side through the good times and the bad , especially if you want to experience true love with someone , if not, then your relationship will more than likely not last the long haul. Learning to remove selfishness from yourself for your partner is unfortunately hard for most people to do for each other and that’s why a lot of relationships fail. Selfishness is one of the biggest relationship killers , it’s been killing relationships for a long time. To remove selfishness you have to wear your partners shoes the same way you expect them to wear yours , if you can’t do that for your partner, don’t expect them to do that for you. It needs to go both ways for any relationship to last period.

[Asker]

Exactly. People need to stop being selfish.

[Finchie40]

Yea unfortunately it’s easier said than done because every one of us has selfishness inside of ourselves so if you can’t remove it for your partner , your partner isn’t going to remove it for you , it needs to go both ways , when my ex turned selfish near then end of our relationship, I saw right through her bullshit and ended it with her , she started prioritizing her friends’ over me and started excluding me from a lot of things which she never did before , she stopped sleeping in bed with me like she never did before , she avoided intimacy and affection with me like she never did before , all these red flags were right in my face and that’s when I put my foot down and told her if she wants this marriage things are going to have to change , if not , be prepared to be single again because I am not going to stay with a girl that is just using me period. You want to treat me like a convenience then you will be my convenience as well , and no longer my priority , My priority will be open to finding a girl that actually wants to be in a relationship that actually wants to experience love and that understands selfishness doesn’t work in relationships, I said you are clearly a selfish person and I don’t want to be with a girl like you whatsoever, Go be with your girlfriend that you are probably dying it out with or up to no good with , so make your plans and get out before I put you out. She told me she wants to be single and that she no longer wants to be tied down in a relationship, I said fine , I can’t force you to be with me , so as of right now we are both single and I took my ring off and threw it in the drawer. I been focusing on myself and been open to dating other girls’ when I met another girl , my ex then realized what she lost and started begging for me back , I laughed and said that ship has sailed

[dwreborn]

I thought i had the right one and she is my best friend soulmate and so much more and after 25 years its over i thought she was it i still do and she won't give me the straight answer when i told people it was definitely over she asked why you say that i said because its truth isn't it she said not yet but she isn't trying to fix anything so yes i did end up with wrong one

[Asker]

I'm sorry to hear that. It must really suck investing more than 2 decades into someone only for all to be gone, all in the trash.

[jazzy34]

According to Google, "While a definitive number for "wrong" partners is not available, studies suggest a significant portion of marriages are entered into by people who eventually realize it was a mistake, with some research indicating 30% of divorced women knew on their wedding day they were marrying the wrong person. Additionally, many marriages experience a decline in happiness, with 40% of first marriages ending in divorce and another ~18% separating."

[dwreborn]

Makes sense 80% of divorce is womens choice. 40% happen in their 40's and if married couples go to counseling they have a70%chance of fixing it which I think that last one is wrong seems to high

[AI Opinion]

As someone who helps people navigate the dating jungle, it's surprisingly common for folks to fall for the love spell without checking the compatibility compass. Falling head over heels can blind us to those elusive red flags. The heart may have its reasons, but sometimes it overpowers reason entirely! 😅 Make sure to look beyond the bedroom fireworks and see if your life puzzle pieces truly fit together. Love takes both chemistry and compatibility to avoid future heartaches! ❤️🔥

[slatyb]

A great many. We aren't born knowing what a healthy relationship looks like. If our parents have a good relationship, then we learn. If our parents relationship is dysfunctional, then not only are we raised with drama, but we have no idea that it could be any other way.

[Anonymous]

Statistically, it's at least 50%. It is why I'm so picky.

[Asker]

Exactly. There is always good reasons to be picky and not wasting time on superficial things is one of them. A long-term relationship or marriage isn't about being stuck in the infatuation period for decades and living happily ever after... without knowing the person and if you're even compatible to them.

[Opinion Owner]

I agree. There are bound to be points of contention in even the most solid relationship. Being able to solve or make peace with those is crucial. Also, infatuation is typically a short term ordeal. Some is bound to see flaws if it reaches about a decade. If I was interested in someone for years without getting to truly know them, I would be well aware it could go no where.

[jahaims]

Most

[Colin234234]

Most people