The best part of having a girlfriend?

[Agrojag]

From what I've seen, girls seem like so much more trouble than any possible pay off they might bring. What justifies all the work and the pain necessary to create and sustain a relationship?

[aficionado]

I'd have to completely agree with you here. I had been in a few relationships earlier, but I have never dated since the past 4 years and this phase has been really blissful for me.

The main issue is that women ALWAYS expect men to make the first move, and they assume that men can magically read their mind to know if they like the man or not. Most men go through several rejections before a woman finally says yes (unless the man happens to have the looks of Tom Cruise, the wealth of Bill Gates, or both). With every rejection, a man's confidence goes down a notch. So when he finally meets a great woman, he wouldn't be confident in approaching her, so she would still reject him because 'he's not confident with women'. If he had asked the same woman out earlier (before his confidence hit rock-bottom due to multiple rejections), she would have accepted him.

The next major hassle is to maintain the relationship. It is a well known fact that it is MUCH easier for a women to get a boyfriend, than for a man to get a girlfriend. So even if he does all the hard work and finally manages to get a girlfriend, he still has to ensure that she stays with him. For this to work, he has to be on his toes always, and make sure that she doesn't lose interest in him. One wrong step, and she leaves him to look for greener pastures. It is not a big deal for her because most women get asked out within days of a break-up (if she is at least average looking). But the man has to again go through the hassles of approaching women, getting rejected etc. before another woman agrees to date him again. So you see, there is no margin for error at all for a man.

In today's world, if a woman is single, people actually appreciate her by saying things like she's focusing on her career, she's waiting for the right man etc. But if a man is single, he is labeled a loser and is assumed to be having some major flaw which prevents him from attracting women.

Don't even get me started on how much the law favors women in matters like divorce, child custody etc. The less said about these, the better. And again, since the coceity (and even women) expects the man to pay most of the times, he may even end up broke.

I agree that women face different kinds of issues, some of them really severe. But when it comes to dating and relationships, women clearly have the upper hand and they dictate the

terms. Having a girlfriend might be blissful and hassle-free for some men, but they are just exceptions, and not the norm. For the others, its definitely a hassle, like you mentioned (unless the man is only looking for sex).

I can proudly say that I have completely given up on women since 4 years, and I'm a MUCH happier man now.

[Tigurinn2]

^ Jesus H. Corbett! One of few honest and insightful comments I've ever seen on GAG

[aficionado]

@Tiqurinn2 Thanks for the appreciation! :)

[Agrojag]

There were some great answers but I think a lot were basedin fantasy. Yours has the most truth in it. I've never seen the fairy tale romance described by some and I have only been miserable chasing that dream.

[aficionado]

Thanks for the best answer! Yeah, I do know that many people have such romantic fairytales to say about their lives. But in reality, that only happens in a few exceptional cases. Also, of late the society as a whole has developed hatred towards men. It is a situation where men are considered a liability and should not exist, unless there is something extraordinary about them.

[Tarvold]

I agree with you. A woman worthy of a relationship is increasingly rare these days.

I guarantee you that less than 1% of women who respond will actually answer your question and give you an example of why it's great for a guy to have a girlfriend as opposed to why it's great for girls to have a boyfriend. Women just don't have a clue about men anymore - they don't know what we want, what are our dreams and aspirations, and they won't listen to us when we try to tell them.

[Agrojag]

So far it looks like your prediction is spot on. 0% answer-rate.

[CrazynKinky]

Yes we really are a giant pain in the ass and most of the time we don't see worth it. But here's the thing you guys are just as annoying if not more so (I'm a girl I just know how frustrating you guys are I know the annoyance of women but never dated one).

Know the saying love is wanting to kill someone but you don't because you'd miss them to much. It's way to realistic.

The reason for being with someone is to be loved. To have someone that you can share anything with. To be with someone that you can scream and yell or just say the stupidest things possible to and know they'll still be there for you. To just have someone to count on and share your life with. It's never having to feel like your alone even when no ones around because you know they love you. It's hard to explain it's just how it is.

Don't believe the girls that say sex cause lets be honest sex slows down and even if it doesn't you can go pick up girls and get laid all the time.

[Agrojag]

That's what I want more than anything. But I've only read about it in books or seen it in movies. I've never experienced it and I wouldn't say that others around me have either -- although I can only speak for myself. To me, it's almost like a myth that I have no faith will ever come true.

[CrazynKinky]

movies don't show you everything. it shows you the love but it doesn't show fighting for a week and then fighting to work it out its not easy but when your with the right person the good times out weight the bad

[Agrojag]

Haha! That wouldn't be a good movie. I don't know. I'm just not sure it's worth wading through all the bad ones to find this mythical "right person." I've only regretted the time I've spent with girls. I was a lot happier back when I didn't bother with them.

[CrazynKinky]

That's the choice you have to make

[kaylaS91]

For one, I think a good relationship shouldn't include any trouble or seem like a hassle for either party. It should seem for the most-part natural, always managing to cheer the boyfriend up. Of course there are the physical benefits of having a girlfriend such as sex, someone to kiss or hug which is always better when there are feelings involved. Also, a girlfriend should be someone who will provide a strong emotional support system, not judging the guy but always standing behind him in whatever he says or does. Everyone loves the feeling of someone else caring for them and who can put them before themselves, which a good girlfriend should do for her man often.

[UberTroll]

Depends on the girl in the relationship. It seems like a lot of girls are kind of selfish when it comes to relationships or at least clueless on how to relate to their boyfriends but that's not the case with every girl. A really good relationship involves very little trouble and a whole lot of happiness. My boyfriend almost gave up on girls but he's pretty happy to be with me now.

[greyiggy]

Finding your gem girl is not going to be easy. Sometimes people must wait until they mature and are ready to reciprocate love and commitment. There are many girls that want to show a man how they appreciate all they are and how amazing they can love us.

I have enjoyed getting to know my long distance boyfriend for the past 3 months and he has told me that I have done more for him in the short time I have known him than all of his ex's combined. I have showered him with my love some meaningful gifts and we have a very special connection that is very powerful. Good Luck

[missjane23]

If you find the right girl you will not see it that way. You seem to have not encountered the unconditional love, support, trust, and yes sex, that come with a long term relationship. When you really click with someone, you won't see all those annoying things as a problem, it will be something that you love her for. When you fall in love and find your best friend, who is also your lover and your other half, you will understand

[Agrojag]

Beautiful answer. But my point is how do I know I will find this person? I don't know of anyone who has. It sounds like a fantasy that I desperately want to come true, but is still a fantasy. I have been really hurt by girls and I don't think it's worth enduring so I can chase a mirage of the horizon.

[missjane23]

You are still young just keep trying don't waste your time on girls that sent right for you focus on the ones that could be

[gonyr]

Well a girl who is that much trouble isn't girlfriend material anyway.

Your girlfriend should also be a friend to. Possibly your best friend. Doesn't mean to stop having your best guy friend. But of you have an attraction to someone, and you have things in common and you go well together than its good.

When your dating a girl, you may buy her some drinks, may ey take her out to dinner and try to get laid.

Girlfriend..."hey what's on netflix? This movie sucks lets fuck" So much easier.

Sure, sometimes you'll fight with a girlfriend but in the end it's worth it. Just don't force it with someone who is nt.

[Prettygurl12]

So wait...what pain are we talking about?

Does it cause you pain to text someone 5 times a day?

Does it cause you pain to spend time with someone once a week?

Does it cause you pain to go to the beach?

Does it cause you pain to share feelings?

Does it cause you pain to get in your car and drive somewhere?

Does it cause you pain to have sex?

Does it cause you pain to hear the words, "I love you,"?

Does it cause you pain to cuddle with a girl?

Does it cause you pain to pay for a meal every once in a while?

The only thing I can possibly see would cause a man pain is paying for a meal. But really, after the first date, she should be paying for herself unless it's like her birthday or something. And let's be real, the first date can be at like Taco Bell or Mc Donalds or something.

[Agrojag]

I brought this girl cheesecake to her work because she loves. I took the time to find who made the best and then went across town to get it. I even had to call in advance and reserve two slices because they were about to sell out. The girl I bought it for wouldn't eat it with me and barely said thank you. I even had to text her just to see if she liked it. It made me feel like nothing -- a pain you obviously haven't experienced.

[Prettygurl12]

Sorry. I appreciate what my boyfriend does for me and I make sure he knows that.

[Agrojag]

All the girls I meet say the same things. I've yet to see it. Maybe I'm just unlucky.

[Prettygurl12]

Perhaps. But I promise I do. And I tell him so. I'd be over the moon if he brought me cheesecake at work. Maybe your girl was having a bad day or a busy one?

[Agrojag]

Everything you described I can enjoy more by myself or with friends more than any girl I've met. I'd like to believe you, but I've been lied by too many women to take your word. Prejudice, I know, but born from experience and observation. No. She was just a bitch. Now that you understand my question better, please tell me why the struggle is worth it.

[Prettygurl12]

Because. When you meet the one girl who appreciates everything you do for her and does things for you in return it'll make all your issues worth it.

[aficionado]

@Prettygurl This is a response to your last comment which said 'when you meet the one girl'. You may want to change 'when' to 'if'. Not every man is lucky enough to find such a girl. In fact, the majority of men can never find her. The phrase 'there is someone for everyone' is a TOTAL myth. I find it really strange that although the world female population is slightly higher than male, women can get away with being choosy whereas men have to keep asking several women until one says yes.

[iluvchewbucca]

If you're gonna look at it like THAT, then we have more to complain and put up with in a relationship with a guy!

I know most guys would say sex, but in reality if you're with the right person, it's so much more than just sex... and you wouldn't look at it as pain and hard unnecessary work... the company and comfort of being with that person is priceless.. and it doesn't compare to being with someone else... male or female.

[Bluegameroyon]

free sex, free sammiches and nice cuddling on the bed/couch.

well, I wish I had one of those 3... can you guess which one? lol.

[Agrojag]

Sammich? Haha!

[Bluegameroyon]

no, cuddling :(

cuddling is far better than sex or sandwiches. well, at least to me it is.

[laceyz565]

Depends on the girl. If she's a whore yes but if she's not then she's worth it

[Smilegirl]

I have no idea what makes you think that women cause more trouble in relationships then men...\

If you care about some one its worth it.

[Tarvold]

This is exactly why we don't care for relationships. This whole "if you care... then..." is bullshit. What ever happened to giving the guy something to care about?

[Smilegirl]

What are you talking about? if you spend time with a woman and you enjoy her company and who she is then you date her and its worth it because you like her for who she is. which means if you don't like high maintenance lady's then you won't get one. I'm not saying to use the "if you care about me" thing as leverage in a relationship. I'm saying its a reason to start one.

[Tarvold]

If I like someone for who they are and enjoy her company then we can be friends.

[Smilegirl]

So against gfs? why?

[Tarvold]

I'm not against gfs at all. I'm just pointing out how much women underestimate the amount of effort they demand from relationships these days, and how arrogant it is that they (in general) seem to think that they are worth it just because they exist. I just wish that women can once again learn to appreciate men.

[Agrojag]

Tarvold, you are exactly right. Women demand so much and I've yet to meet one that understands that -- let alone appreciate it.

[Smilegirl]

What makes you assume we don't put effort in? Last night I took care of my drunk boyfriend because he was depressed. I ordered us pizza and got him beer and made sure he was alright. for a HEALTHY relationship effort is put forth by both parties. don't assume just because some girls are demanding and put no effort in a relationship that all are like that.

[Agrojag]

The problem is I've only heard stories like that. Never seen it. The VAST majority are exactly as Tarvold describes. So why is it worth it to run through burning coals hoping there's leperchaun gold on the other side? That's what I want to know.

[Smilegirl]

Thats why you talk to a girl first. after being in countless abusive relationships I now take things a bit slower. me and my current boyfriend were just FWB to start. untill the night he was depressed and he saw how I cared for him.. you can't just see a hot girl and date her yeah that will might end with a b*tch who dose nothing but expects everything. you need to get to some one and how they treat the people around them. but till then just fuck around.

[Agrojag]

I do. Sometimes I trick myself other times I am misled, but the end is the same. I want something more than sex, but I don't think it's really worth the struggle. So, please answer my question, why is it worth it to struggle, fail, hurt, repeat again and again until I find someone? The more I get involved with girls, the more disappointed and hurt I feel.

[Smilegirl]

I can only talk from my experience and girls have it rough too.. I have been beaten, raped treated like a servant, which I don't mind, I like to take care of my man. but that all taught me exactly what I didn't want in a man so now I have found one who is great to me and I am great to him in return. I think it is worth the pain and hurt and the fail because one day you will meet the right girl... and you will know it is because all the crap others put you through she wont. love isn't easy

[Agrojag]

I'm sorry that happened to you. I don't know if it's worth all that in the hopes you may eventually find someone. I'll have to think on it. Thank you for your answer.

[Anonymous]

I thought the best part was sex since that's all that guys want.(which they have stated themselves)

[dodgypirate]

That's on the verge of sexism.

[Agrojag]

I never stated that. I want much more than that.

[Opinion Owner]

It's not sexism if guys say it themselves.

[Tarvold]

That's a myth. Men who have their shit together get more sex when they're single.

[Betwyn]

The frequent sex?

[Anonymous]

sexual intercourse