Search Results: problems in friendship

How do you handle conflict? With a partner, friendship, work, family, etc?

Competing -
Value of own issue/goal: High
Value of relationship: Low
Result: “I win, you lose”
Competitors come across as aggressive, autocratic, confrontational and intimidating. "Standing up for your right."

Accommodating -
Value of own issue/goal: Low
Value relationship: High
Result: “I lose, you win”
Accommodators set aside their own needs because they want to please others in order to keep the peace.

Avoiding -
Value of own issue/goal: Low
Value of relationship: Low
Result: “I lose, you lose”
Avoiders deliberately ignore or withdraw from a conflict rather than face it. Avoiders do not seem to care about their issue or the issues of others. People who avoid the situation hope the problem will go away, resolve itself without their involvement or rely on others to take the responsibility.

Compromising -
Value of own issue/goal: Medium
Value of relationship: Medium
Result: “I win some, you win some”
Compromisers are willing to sacrifice some of their goals and persuade others to give up theirs, too–give a little, get a little. Compromise maintains the relationship and can take less time than other methods but resolutions may focus on demands rather than needs or goals.

Collaborating -
Value of own issue/goal: High
Value of relationship: High
Result: “I win, you win”
Collaboration generates creative solutions that satisfy all the parties’ concerns and needs. Collaborators identify the underlying concerns, test assumptions and understand the views of others. Collaboration fosters respect, trust and builds relationships. Collaborators address the conflict directly and in a way that expresses willingness for all parties to get what they need.

I was suspecting my long distance boyfriend having affair with Yannie who he also met online. He told me they are only friends but I was wondering why he cares about the problems in her life. He tried to justify it that he is just compassion person but he rarely cared about mine (emotionally unavailable) and do not even anymore sends gifts even if I do. I also caught him sending a flower to this girl after 3 months of our relationship. And, also sent her family foods two months because he said they are poor. He said he only send it as a friend gify because she was depressed. He insist me to look a job for this and he got mad when I didn't.

I got so mad of the girl to the point I told her that he was stealing my boyfriend and to stay away from my boyfriend. The girl blocked him but then my boyfriend got so mad that I destroyed their friendship. He told me they are just strictly friend and the girl has a girlfriend cuz she is lesbian.

If she is lesbian why does she need to vent to my boyfriend and why my boyfriend cares a lot.

Am I being jealous or my instinct is right they have affair?