Search Results: problems in relationship

While book-smarts or street-smarts help a person in specific ways, Emotional Intelligence is what we use most in the real world -- it's the mindfulness, awareness and processing ability we have for both our feelings and the feelings of others.

Current research indicates that those with higher levels of EI draw others towards them... They're people who others genuinely want to be around for the long haul -- at work/school/relationships. Their kindness and compassion towards others shine through their EI, as does their ability to own up to their own decisions (instead of blaming them on others) and to treat others with respect and dignity.

Here 's a quick 20-point quiz for you guys and gals -- the most common signs of EI

(+1 for each point you "sort of understand" and +2 for each point you're really good at):

• Being able to know and accept yourself for who you are (with all your quirks and experiences)...
• Being able to accept responsibility for your actions and decisions...
• Being able to accept change as a standard part of life...
• Being able to control emotions rather than raging and lashing out and flying off the handle with verbal/physical outbursts...
• Being able to forgive yourself -- to show yourself some grace -- by leaving past mistakes in the past...
• Being able to talk through problems and challenges with others...
• Being aware of your own strengths -- and being able to admit to them...
• Being aware of your own weaknesses -- and being able to admit to them...
• Being modestly confident and poised -- and keeping your cool in challenging situations...
• Showing empathy and compassion -- putting yourself in another person’s shoes and seeing things from their perspective...

The scoring goes by 5s (see the poll, which keeps answers anonymous). Don't share your score in comments if you don't want to.

(Those with a low score wondering how to raise EI can search Google for free materials that are very helpful.)