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A little context. I’m (22M) and I’ve been currently talking to this girl for about a month and I’m conflicted if I should tell her I’m on deferred probation soon or about 3-6 months in. Make a long story, I used to do psychedelics and it ended with me being on probation 7 years but I can get off in 3 1/2 years if I don’t violate it and meet all my requirements. This happened like a year ago and ever since then I don’t do ANY drugs or are around anyone/anything that’ll lead me to violate my probation. It was a big mistake. I’ve been slowly completing my probation requires and have 5 days left of labor detail and still have to start on my community service, which I plan on doing about 2-4 hrs a week. I have my own place, car, job, and am currently building a business which I plan on launching by the end of this year. I have a mentor and business advisor and work on my business nearly everyday and I am very passionate about it and I believe she can tell too or at least is really realizing it (I already told her I’m passionate about my business and just business in general). I take very good care of myself, no kids, masculine, and intelligent. But at the end of the day I feel like once she hears I’m on probation it’s gonna automatically be a no go. Any advice or suggestions will be greatly appreciated.

Its a very tough topic to talk about but I (26 M) sometimes do experience sexual harassment.

!! Before going further I do acknowledge that girls experience this from men as well and I do not want to deny this, I merely want to open up the conversation that it can go both ways!!

But when I talk about it with my friends they usually laugh it off because I'm a guy and specially female friends are like yeah I really doubt its close to what I'm experiencing.

Now with small stuff I'm not too bothered, like a girl when shouts like take me home with you when I'm out is kinda funny and easy to brush off. Although there are things that go too far. One example is that when I arrive at a gym I have girls staring at me and aggressively trying to take a peek when I'm changing clothes (it has subsides since I go there once or twice a day now and I'm quite a regular). This stuff does creep me out.

Also sometimes when I walk in jogging pants or something loose some girl will randomly grab my ass. This only happened twice in the last year but this really does cross a line.

The worst part is though that there is no right way to respond as a guy, if I get angry at her people will think im being aggressive to a helpless woman, and if I tell the truth people just stare in disbelief because I'm a man.

Now I will be honest that it's not the scariest thing to me since I don't go to clubs and I only drink water so getting something slipped in my drink is nearly impossible. I'm also physically stronger then 99% of other people I meet (men and women). But I worry since I have a girlfriend and we are extreemly prude with these things.

I wanted to ask for guys, have you ever experienced this and how do you deal with this? And for girls do you think this happens to guys and have you done it in the past?

And more importantly how to open up this conversation?