Search Results: did i turn him off

Should I be turned off by my online friend? Or am I overthinking this? So I’ve had an online friend for a few years and he started wishing me a happy birthday every year after we got to know each other a little better. There were times where he would & I wouldn’t, when that were the case, he’d follow up a few days or maybe a week after saying I forgot it was his birthday (more subtly). Last year, he wished me a happy belated & this year I decided to also be more laid back. I just asked him if he had a good birthday maybe a day or two after it actually happened, I sent him that message after he followed up with me about something else. He leaves me on read yet continues to view my IG stories. This has always been the case, he’s always one of the first to see my stories but may go weeks without msging me. A few years back, he’d literally go weeks without replying but will be the first person to see my stories or comment. But when I’d take long to get back to him, he’d *jokingly* say that I’m ignoring him or ask if I’m busy. Honestly I don’t feel like I did anything wrong so I don’t see the need to reach out, it just seems hypocritical. You can be busy but I can’t? He hasn’t made a comment like that in years & his response time has gotten better but it’s been almost 5 months & I haven’t heard from him. I have a tendency to delete people when my frustration has built up, I don’t know if it’s an avoidant personality style trait. But he’s the only “friend” I have so I want to think this through. It’s not looking too good & I’m feeling tempted to ignore him if he reaches out again or remove him from IG soon if I don’t hear back before then. I don't know if this indicates anything but after taking online quizzes, I came back as DA and he came back as FA.

After reflecting back on this man I talked to I can’t put my finger on him..

I talked to a guy that tried to emotionally manipulate me into having sex with him even though I said no and I needed to work on myself.. ofc when I said that I still wasn’t ready he turned into a jerk and he stopped making me feel safe.

I feel that he truly didn’t respect my boundaries

He follows explicit trans and male male female content… incest stories…alot of the content he follows are people who live in the same city as him… a lot of the men following those pages had “dl” in their bio…

I think he connects with those individuals…

I met him off a dating site and he uses a false name and I just discovered that his profile is set to women and nonbinary individuals

Sneaky behavior

A few months ago, a new guy started at my place. He works in a different area and he caught my eye. I noticed that sometimes he would look at me and smile.

I only see him about 3 times a day in the canteen (for morning break, lunch break and afternoon break). He sits at a table with his colleagues and he is normally looking at his phone.

For some reason, I’ve been paying more attention to him recently and we will glance at each other across the canteen but I always look away first.
I’ve noticed that he will gaze/stare at me and then smile. I’m always the first person to look away.

Sometimes it will catch me off guard, for example, I looked up and saw him staring/smiling at me while I was chatting with friends. I decided to do something about it. The other week, he was walking towards me and we smiled at each other. I said hello to him and he smiled even more, and looked down.

A couple of days after, I looked down at him while he was sat eating and we smiled. Ever since then, he has been avoiding eye contact in close proximity. When he walks past me, he will turn his head away and won’t look at me.

Then yesterday, we were walking towards each other and I looked up at him and smiled. He looked at me, smiled and said “Hiya” in a soft, quiet voice as he walked off. Is he just shy or something? Could he be attracted to me? Not sure why he is purposely avoiding eye contact. We do look at each other from a distance but it’s only a quick glance and not very often.