Search Results: telling guys no

I recently left while my spouse was at work because I had a gut feeling I was no longer safe and wouldn’t get another chance to leave. There were many reasons I left and had packed a “go bag,” but it still hurts…. I still feel like I didn’t give him enough chances and like maybe I was the manipulative one or somehow mucking things up… I just… felt like I needed to leave… I checked into a hotel under an alias and left the area and only texted him twice—the first to say I went on a mini weekend getaway and the second to say I was taking an extended time away. I flew to my mom’s and have been no contact directly with him since. Every time he speaks to my family (who reached out to settle a few things on my behalf), he tries to say I was just so mentally unwell and that I’ve stuck him with *soooo many bills.* For reference: my family and I pay the entire rent still, I paid off any bills that are in my name that we were handling jointly, and have been working on getting my phone and car insurance separate from his. The only new thing he has been responsible for is buying his own food—otherwise, his expenses have gone down. He has been telling others that this is why he’s “had to work so many more hours” (again for reference: he was working 30 hours and I was working 50-55 hours a week).
He also has been moving his guy friends all into the apartment and they stay there for weeks at a time despite that being against the lease.

I guess… I just… am I being stupid? Did I muck up something I shouldn’t have?