Search Results: will this relationship work

We talk for hours, almost every day. She already defined our relationship as friendship only, which is dissapointing because we get on soo well with each other and I've never felt this spark with anyone before, but that is fine because I'd rather have her as a friend than not at all. We share the same hobbies, opinions, and values, except on this occasion. I'm sure there was a mutual attraction to start, but I wasn't quick enough to action, and after a year of talking, the sexy facard which we put on when trying to attract someone has dropped, and she saw the real me, which isn't so appealing. But I found a smart, funny, like minded friend, so still a win.

We've been calling for about a year, mostly for work but the calls always became personal. Within the past few months have we been talking every day for hours, outside of work.

We live 120 miles apart, so although we've talked about doing things, it never happened. But she talks about visiting her other friends who live as far from her as I do. When I asked if we could meet for lunch in her town, when she was free, she nervously laughed and refused. We carried on awkwardly for a few more minutes, I asked why, she told me meeting in person isn't a criteria for a friendship. And if we met once, why would that change things. I told her meeting should be the next phase of our friendship.

I don't understand. How do I differ from her other friends? It makes me feel like she dosent value me as much as the other people in her life, or like I was just an ear to listen for the past year. Its worse because I really care about her. I want the best for her and for her to be happy, but what she wants isn't what I want

I will obviously respect her wishes and not bring up the topic again. But it saddens me that this is as far as we will go, or even if our relationship will remain after this.

Before it's suggested, she's not a catfish.

Am I in the wrong? Is this kind of relationship common?

Why would she object so strongly?

I've had this question from multiple females in ailing relationships recently. Seems an expectation of men that no matter the difficulty, they will keep fighting and come back for the woman... undying love.

... and so I ask about staying power...

Imagine your beautiful mate is everything you wanted and easy, except one thing. Each day, they prick you with a small needle, not worse than a bee sting. It's ridiculous, but it's their way out outletting internal grief and you accepted their cultural behavior because they are perfect in every other way.

How many days of that can you endure.

This is the basis in some cultures, of torture...

Obviously there's a point to the analogy. Relationships have some pain which we need to endure, hopefully a lot more good and you learn to work together effectively to make each others lives better, more fun, more joyful, fulfill needs of each.

...

Love seems a bit alchemy doesn't it, and maybe a notch fickle. It requires great communication, patience, giving, receiving, accepting. It's alchemy cooking...