Search Results: drug abuse

There's an old saying a leopard never changes it's spots.

So someone who is abusive likely will never change. Someone who uses drugs will likely never change. Someone who doesn't manage mental health issues properly likely never will.

And so forth.

Given this do you feel that it's smart to get a background & other - such as financial / credit (for gambling issues, etc.) - checks on someone you're dating / getting into a relationship.

Particularly as unless you know person - via friends, neighbors or work - you're likely never going to meet the previous people they dated & thus have no reference for their behavior.

.

It's very easy - and happens quite often - for abusive individuals to pretend to be "nice" until they lull their victims into a sense of false security.

And by doing checks you can find out that "nice guy (or girl)" may have being beating the shit out of their previous partner BEFORE they are beating the shit out of you.

I ask as this is an argument by many. It's genetic.

But I look at my cousin. He was adopted into my family. His biological mother was a heavy alcholic and his father a in and out of jail meth/crackhead. He met them when he was 20s. After one event of drinking far too much at 24 - as many young twenties do - he has never touched a drop of alcohol since. He's 43.

I admit that there may be a genetic issue resulting in a poorer ability to cope with situations or life which might be a mental health issue.

The reason why I say this my mother had an issue with drinking - poor ability to cope. Her mother - again poor ability to cope. Her grandmother - never touched a drop of alcohol & was phenomenal with her ability to cope with awkward, difficult, or hard situations.