What should I do with my unfriendly roommate?

[XRabbitHeartX]

OK so I been living with him for a year and a half. Everything seems to go fine and no serious problems but I honestly can't stand his unfriendliness towards me anymore. I try so bad to greet him, tell him when I go out and wash his dishes sometimes but he does NOTHING in return ever. He seems to be extremely anti-social too and it's just getting to the point where I feel disrespected. He shows no interest in my life whatsoever. I try talking to him but I get no decent reply. He doesn't ask how i'm doing, how my weekend was etc etc etc. Also the cherry on the fucking cake is that he tells his mom that he asks me all the time to do things with him and then I say no which he has NEVER done. So basically he lied to his mom and made me seem like a bad person. His mom then told my mom.

I know the logic solution is talk to him but he's such a awkward person to talk to. I can't even have a normal conversation with him so how on earth can I handle a conflict conversation and for that matter how will he if he's so socially awkward. I'm also so angry right now about everything that I don't even know how I can manage a conversation.

Any help or insight?

Updates

+1 y

Also he never says bye. When he leaves, I just don't even know or he walks right out without saying anything.

[Conrad_Kelsiven]

Sounds like you have a bad case of my brother. (He has a mild case of asperger, which affects his social skills heavily.) Really, the best way to deal with such a roommate sometimes is to work around them. Your efforts to become more friendly would work better with a regular person, but if they are similar to my brother, it may just irritate them more. (Not that certainly is the case here, just appears to be.)

I wouldn't expect any form of regular conversation, as attempts at it probably bothers him more. You would have more luck looking into any hobbies he might have. (My brother can't hold an everyday conversation for a minute, but he can go on for a literal hour about electronics... even if I stop listening.)

And, as hopromantic said, "clean only the dishes you use and leave his out so he gets the point leave his mess be dnt touch it"

[NatureRelisher]

I'd suggest not talking to him and not cleaning up his dishes. Wait until he talks to you and then start talking about what he likes. Don't talk about you, talk about him. Ik it's an entirely one sided conversation but just try it and see if it works. That's what I would do.

[northernligths]

You are trying too hard. Stop washing his dishes, he doesn't have to show interest in your life. You guys are roommates not friends. Why are your moms talking to each other anyways? Just move out, live alone or find a roommates that wants to be social. Very very simple and open and shut case.

Move out
find a new roomie
live alone
move back in with mommy

Pick one.. problem solved!

[XRabbitHeartX]

I'm at university, 45 mins away from home. Also it's a student town and apartments are firstly expensive and secondly hard to come by... it's not as easy as just moving out. Our moms are friends that's why they talked.

[northernligths]

Tues to thurs you will be in class all day and when your done go to the library or a lounge anywhere on campus to study. Just go home to sleep. Bring a lunch and supper of something also. So, your pretty much never home. Also, figure out his schedule and try not to be home when he is home (Except for sleep time of course but you are sleeping and don’t have to acknowledge him.

[northernligths]

First off be thankful you can afford to be where you are since some people can't afford to go to University and therefore they dont attend. Your roomate is anti social and a liar and there is nothing you can do about that. You can only control your reaction to it. So, dont do his dishes, dont try to be his friend and dont even say hi. Just ignore him. Tell your mom that you tried and he lied and that you will keep to yourself from now on. Its up to his mom to talk to him. Since you have a few years left of school do your best to request a room transfer, a sublet or anything you can manage to figure out. Even if it takes months before a room change goes through at least you have applied for one. Perhaps on weekends you can go home to see your mom. Also, next semester try to schedule your classes so you can have a long as possible weekend. What I mean is maybe you can cram your classes tues to thursday, so Thursday night you leave for your moms and only return Tuesday morning for class.

[Marihorror]

I don't understand the issue here. As long as he isn't leaving his shit around all the time or having loud sex then he sounds like a decent room mate. You should have moved in with a friend if you wanted someone to take an interest in your life.

[XRabbitHeartX]

It's in my opinion basic human manners to at least greet someone you stay with. I'm not asking for friendship. I'm asking to be treated as a human being. That's it. I don't know 1 person at my uni who stays with someone who fails to have any conversation with them and pretty much ignores them on a daily basis. I've just never seen it happen before.

[hopromantic]

You have to tell him how you feel that or move out when you get the chance also which I've dne this with my roommate myself, clean only the dishes you use and leave his out so he gets the point leave his mess be dnt touch it

[Ihav2fart]

Simply, move in with me! Problem solved!