Do people really dislike and hate those who are timid or lack self-confidence?

[ShadezMcgee]

I saw some answers to a question regarding confidence the other day and was surprised with some of what I read. Some answers bordered on hostility, disappointment, resentment, disdain, etc.

[Smoke-n-Growls]

I think it depends.

Some people love that, and prefer people like that.

Personally, I don't. I wouldn't say I "dislike" people like that, but I certainly wouldn't entertain a relationship with someone like that.

I have a fairly strong personality, and I am attracted to people who have a similarly strong personality and drive. I've dated timid people who lack self-discipline and it became tiresome quite quickly.

To me, I find it almost like having to manage the other person when I date someone timid. I prefer someone who can manage their own lives and contribute jointly to our lives together.

[ShadezMcgee]

So when you say manage you felt like a parent? Like their mother in a way?

How did they not manage their own lives?

[Smoke-n-Growls]

Both a mother and a work boss.

He relied on me for help on everything from making to do lists for his job, his housecleaning, etc.

I knew his project deadlines, basically. If I didn't help him at work, he would get written up.

I broke up with him because he lied to me about his immigration status for months as I settled a new place for us, moved in alone and everything. He said he had all his immigration stuff under control, and we had talked to an immigration consultant (I got her contact for us) and he told me he had been in touch with her.

So imagine my shock when he's turned away at the border because he literally tried to immigrate into Canada illegally. I even drove most of the way up from his hometown because he was too tired (he didn't pack his UHaul, even, his sister and I did).

At 31, his mother still paid his phone bill.

I'm glad it was just LDR, and I'm never doing it again.

[ShadezMcgee]

I honestly don't see how one being timid or having low self esteem fits with your personal story if I were to be honest. It sounds more like the guy was an immature man child amd wanted someone to be his mother more than a girlfriend.

[Smoke-n-Growls]

For him, his timidness and low self-esteem were parts of why he did what he did.

He was an immature man child, as well.

To me, though, it was still a valuable experience that showed I don't mix well with someone timid with self-esteem issues that haven't been worked on.

I got tired of having to initiate most things, and I am a passionate person. His timidness was often limiting to what we could do together.

Now I know I want to find someone more outgoing than I am. Or at least equally passionate about certain things.

[GenaBaby1995]

Omg, yes I hate begging will sex related. Guys need to be strong and take care of the needy ❤️

[EnglishEuropean]

Yes, it's an atavistic instinct linked to our tribal origins. In times of hardship weaker individuals were killed so that they did not become a waste of scarce resources while contributing nothing to the tribe's wellbeing.

We see similar behaviour in dogs where healthy dogs will attack a dog who is old, weak or sick. In England we call it "nature, red in tooth and claw".

[NathanDavis]

nope... I know a few like that

in fact, I was like that myself... and I never hated myself for it neither did others, in spite of me being timid and extremely shy, people would still like me and be cool about it... while many others were just neutral to it... but I never got hate (not counting the few incidents of getting teased just like any other kids would)

[MCheetah]

It's mostly women who hate men who lack arrogance and conceit (aka "confidence"), but generally yes.

[Fuentes]

I dont look down on people unlesa their is a reason too

[Slim57]

Yeah from my experience but I hate the opposite of those people who think they're better

[Avicenna]

I don’t think so

[fonduegirl]

I do