Do you think that someone who is in their 20's who doesn't have a license, college education or a job should be considered a loser or a failure?

[Anonymous]

Updates

+1 y

What if it wasn't their fault that they were like that? They had abusive parents who never taught them how to drive, force them to learn themselves, etc?

[JamesDiaz11]

While everyone doesn't have the same starting point, difficulty level- if you're in your 20's and don't have anything going for you at all, it's your own fault. There are jobs offered literally everywhere, education at the community college level is relatively cheap, and someone could relatively easily build themselves into a professional in 2-4 years of consistent work.

Get a job at a fast food place, making crap money, but get that 40 hours in. Listen to management seminars on youtube for free, and show interest in learning how the business functions. Management at fast food places comes very quickly, and is even offered to teens. Again, be consistent, be on time, get sleep, eat well (fruits/ veggies are cheap), and don't blow your money on anything stupid. You don't need a car your first year, you can get by riding the bus and using a bike.

After your first year of getting your financial life in order (you're not going to be rich, but you'll have a few thousand dollars saved up, and a place to stay where you can find peace, even if you have a few roommates) go to the local community college and ask about two-year programs (I would suggest dental hygienist, or something in healthcare, even a medical code biller). Warning: don't go for business (anything short of an MBA isn't respected), or any liberal arts nonsense- go for actual skills, even if it's a trade (welding, framing, etc.).

All this time DO NOT get into a relationship, have sex, etc. Nothing will mess your plan up quicker than getting involved with someone when your mind is still stuck in many loser ways (you'll pick a guy who may impregnate you, mistreat you, steal your money, or otherwise get you fired/ distracted from what you need to do). Also, don't befriend losers- anybody who is happy in mediocrity should be avoided- find people who are in college as well, get inspired by their ideas.

When you graduate whatever program, after showing consistent work for around three years (from today) you'll then be able to start working full-time, in a respectable profession, making decent money, and able to afford your own modest place, a decent car and be in a position to be with someone romantically.

While many guys fault women for being hypergamous, do not interact with a guy who isn't better off than you, and only one who will take you on dates (even if it's just a coffee or a walk).

[Asker]

Did you not see the "no driver's license" part? You can't get a job if you don't even have a license.. lol

[Asker]

Plus what if you live in a city with no public transportation or you can't ride a bike? You're just shit out of luck dude lol

[JamesDiaz11]

False. I work in Human Resources, and you only need identification to complete your employment authorization (I-9), which doesn't require a drivers license. Get a copy of your birth certificate and/ or your social security card and you can get a state ID (this will LOOK like a drivers license usually).
That's all you need to get a job.
All these "buts," and "what ifs" just show me that you're a loser who will make a million excuses no matter what. You're not "out of luck," you're just a lazy loser who is living off the mistaken believe that no matter what you do you can't make it, when I've made it clear that you can.
If you want to stay in that loser-space, that's your choice.

[Asker]

If public transportation isn't available, applying for jobs is pointless. That doesn't make you a "loser".

[lightbulb27]

it's easy to label someone, but no. Someone whom has not had good parental support and has trauma is going to be delayed, or is going to be highly motivated depending up on their personality and issues.

As well, if they are labeled doesn't mean they stay there.

At 20, they now own their future, it may be hard but they gotta take ownership of their life. Set a 10 year plan.

I'd much rather see such people supported and encouraged than degraded. Here's a fella that to me, has had a lot of abuse and stress and trauma and is fundamentally, capable of being a good productive citizens... if he gets the support. It's sad to see so many people abused in our society. Not to say he hasn't or won't make bad choices and mistakes, we're all human. Give a person the right support, they can thrive. It's what our society/communities/churches/ social media should be doing.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/gREuo5HUK6k

[SeriouslyFunny00]

Of course no. There's a reason for everything. Life's not a race, so there's no need to rush. 20's? I knew people who just finished college in their 50's, started life in their 40's.. and so on. What matters is when you keep going and continue on whatever works for you. 🤍

[LazerBean]

Like long term no job? Yeah pretty much. And a loser is a loser regardless of who's fault it is. If you're an able bodied adult and you can't or won't support yourself in any way, that is directly your own fault.

[20yearsolder]

Every one of those things you can overcome. Move on, learn how to drive. Have a friend teach you. If you want an education, go get it. Work for it. Millions of people have done it in the past. There's no excuse. Just because you're doing it later in life doesn't mean shit

[MCheetah]

No. It depends on what they're doing about it. If they're FINE with that and not trying to improve themselves, and are happily leeching off of mom and dad, then yeah, they're a loser. But if they're 21, and trying to get a job or move out of their parents house, then no.

[exitseven]

People are only losers if they think that way about themselves. Lots of people have gone to college later in life and ended up being successful. I did not graduated from college until I was almost 30.

[JustiReno]

My old boss said you can blame your parents for your life until you turn 30, by that time you had plenty of time to figure it out

[whirled_up_girl]

Not necessarily, and if you live somewhere that has adequate public transporation and driver's license might not even be necessary.

[KrakenAttackin]

Not as long as they are working toward some goals (other than Only Fans star).

[Anonymous]

I'm in this situation.

I finished high school and took some hospitality and retail course. i have worked hard in my life but no employer cares.

most jobs I have applied for need a license or rolled their eyes that I don't have one.

[MikeInHawaii]

When I was 19, I was working 80 hour weeks at two jobs, taking three college courses at a time and maintaining a B average.

[Waldoe]

NO one is a loser... every person must follow their own path... when this person finds the "One" thing that excites her/him, that is when they will find happiness...

[joeldalton]

If that person continues down that path, yeah. If that person improves their life then no.

[Snakeyes7]

If they are actively trying to get them then I wouldn't think that is appropriate.

[maximumpower]

Not necessarily but WOULD wonder what the hell they're doing with their lives.

[Kingofkings1992]

We can all be down on our luck sometimes, but they need to take the appropriate steps to improve their situation in life.

[NathanDavis]

I didn't have any of those at age 22... lmao

[Anonymous]

Well they aren't exactly killing it.

[shortster]

Nope.