When a bad person dies when is appropriate to address them as such?

[myabe123]

Updates

+1 y

So this girl that sent me death threats in high school went missing and before she died I wrote her true persona through my own eyes. I got threatened with a defamation lawsuit and apologized. Then this guy in our old friend group sister kind of came for me. I said the dead girl was a bitch and lets not try to remember her as a saint. I don't regret it.

[RealMarek]

Speaking ill of the dead will often meet with social disapproval. The real question is whether you have some bitterness because of how she treated you. If so, you would feel better in the long run if you let it go. She met a bad end, don’t carry her spirit with you into your future.

[myabe123]

I’m already over it and don’t care who knows

[RealMarek]

Well, if you find yourself bringing her up unprompted you might want to reassess whether you are really over it. But if someone asks you how she was in real life, well, the truth is the truth.

[myabe123]

I do not

[888theGreat]

Preachers are wrong to say the person is in Heaven for sure.

1) God makes that decision

2) No one knows the true heart of a person

3) Most people end up in Hell because the Bible says that.

I know funerals are for the living not the dead and that is why preachers say they go to Heaven.

[menina]

I think it is. The fact that they're dead doesn't change what they did when they were alive. Addressing them as "saints" or "good" people would be hypocritical in my opinion.

[Uannoyme]

For your own well-being, let it go. You don't have to be nice and say anything good, nothing at all is fine. Your best revenge is to go on, do well, and be happy.

[Summeroflove]

Depends on the situation. But as a rule I don’t like to speak ill of the dead. They’re dead and gone now so. It does no good to stay angry

[BungusHighFivePizza]

How about a deeper convo or make some jokes or about them (nothing too serious)? Or something in between.

[exitseven]

I always say "it couldn't happen to a nicer guy" In more extreme cases I pee on their Graves

[exitseven]

Re update- In the 8th grade this kid used to pick on me. One Saturday night he got into a fight with his father and took the family station wagon , He crashed it into a big oak tree and was killed. The car was towed to a body shop near my house. I remember seeing it with the front end all smashed up. I went to his wake with a couple of other kids. He was the first dead person I ever saw. He was all made up because he got messed up pretty bad. I looked at him and thought that he was never gonna pick on me again.

[David4358]

Your an adult.. she was a kid.. maybe it's time you acted like an adult and move on with your life?

[myabe123]

Fair enough

[myabe123]

She never apologized either it was an OD and I do feel bad. I don’t think about her much but I’ll never forget the way I wanted to end my life.

[David4358]

So don't stoop to her level, be the better person and never look back.

[myabe123]

You are right. I haven’t thought about her much. And have a somewhat healthy life. She was pretty too.

[David4358]

And you are beautiful as well, you have your whole life ahead of you, don't let your past drag you down.. look forward not backwards

[Surely]

Sometimes it takes the better person to let the past in the rear and move on in life.
Nothing you can say or do will change the past nor make the future better.

[gorydetails]

It's best to stop concerning yourself with them. They're dead. Anything you say to them goes nowhere.

[EaterPeter]

It should be buried with them which is not possible always

[myabe123]

I feel evil but I didn’t write any fictions about her

[EaterPeter]

It can be bad for you and used against you in court of law if person dies in odd circumstances worst you would be suspect and need to be cleared

[EaterPeter]

Let it go is better for us. Since she is already dead. Forgiveness works better for us than others.

[EaterPeter]

Forgive yourself first for feeling the way you feel. No feelings are bad.

[myabe123]

She overdosed and died. They already threatened to sue me

[EaterPeter]

Feelings are there to observe or process. Acting on bad feelings can be bad. Like feeling to hurt someone.

[EaterPeter]

Lawyer up

[EaterPeter]

Don't communicate personally

[myabe123]

I already took it down. And they are avoiding a law suit

[EaterPeter]

Get restraining order if needed

[EaterPeter]

Try using all what they are doing against them though lawfully is the key

[SaoirseS]

Wait until after the funeral, if there is one.

[Shamalien]

Des mortius nil nisi bonum

[Luckycharms12]

There dead let it go can't hurt anyone anymore

[Kmoney100]

Yes it is