I've noticed a proliferation of 'girls only' groups - is there a reason for this?

[Levin]

So my social life has gone rather unfortunate of late, therefore I've made some rather vain attempts to 'get out there'.

On my hunt for new activities, I've noticed something quite curious.

There seems to be a lot of girl only social activities. Girl only yoga, girl only running, girl only book clubs, girl only hiking events. To the effect that I've been struggling to find some events that I'm interested in and would be welcome to by virtue of owning a rather prominent phallus.

I'm just wondering do you believe there is a deeper reason for this?

ie are men being left behind in terms of their development?

Or seen as creepy?

I've also been spotting a lot more lesbian relationships of late.

I'm just wondering is there a theme? Are men becoming redundant or being seen as some how morally debase relative to women?

Women, do you still value men?

Men, have you spotted anything similar?

Please try and give thoughtful answers rather than some kind of bitter gender war.

[_Maya_]

So most groups I am familiar with are on campus. They are all inclusive from the ones that I know. Doesn't matter what gender you are. I'm talking outside the obvious one gender sorority and fraternity. As for where I live there are more groups that allow both genders than just one. Again this is just from what I can tell and have seen. Now there are men only and women only for sure. I don't know which outweighs the other. Never bothered to look at it that closely. My guess is that some of the women only groups are targeting married or women in relationships so they feel like they have a group where they know they aren't going to be hit on. Let's be honest. Guys hit on girls far more than the other way around. Some girls aren't looking to join a club where they will be approached and propositioned for a date.

[Levin]

What are your general thoughts on men?

[_Maya_]

As in dating or? I'm bi. I've dating two guys and two girls including current relationship. I date the person and not the gender. Had great relationships with both.

[Levin]

That's cool. For some reason I got the impression you didn't like men very much.

[_Maya_]

Certainly not the case. My best (and longest) friend is a guy.

[HelpfulWoman]

its more of "women's safe space for whatever activity to skip the creepy and pervy comments a lot of men will make"
like the yoga for instance is a big ass one for creepy men to be like "oo spread those legs for me baby!" type of comments.

[Sun_Kim-Ai]

I have always seen them around where I live.

I am even allowed in a couple of those women-only circles, and I have yet to understand if it's something I should be flattered about, or worried.

[goaded]

They just want to do something without be hassled.

[Levin]

I know, but to assume all men are like that. Like I really get a lot of female-male companionship and friendship. It is a shame that the whole lot of being cast away for some bad apples.

[goaded]

Everyone knows it's not every man, but it's far too complicated to filter out the assholes; this is the simplest approach. Don't complain about it, accept it and join in with events that do include men.

[Rosexøxø]

They just need a safe quiet place without having to filter perform or worry be mindful of sexual innuendos and all of that. It’s where they can be little girls with sisters and friends and not worry about smell judgement “being better”/ hierarchy ego any of that - the potentials and so on.

It’s just less hassle as goaded mentioned.

Life is stressful these days and not everyone is looking for a relationship that involves sex or courtship.

The lesbians- those either grew up with that, were violated, had an early sex/ attraction encounter involving that, and sometimes feel safer in those relationships with women. No need to walk on eggs shells, defend one’s own view, or feel lesser. They can talk maybe argue but then move on amongst themselves. It’s simple when the insecurities are moved to the side.

[Rosexøxø]

Just find non-women-only events or public events like beaches parks concerts.

They should still have inclusive and general ones and things for adept people like classes in gyms regardless of gender and more catered to skill level

Women just need to have one for themselves so they can have that option. The option is just nice to have and can offer a lot of them peace of mind.

[Rosexøxø]

And some safety too

[Rosexøxø]

At least a place that has lower chances of any physical altercations/confrontations or so.

[Levin]

@Rosexøxø I take your point but I also think women only dynamics and social circles can be an absolute nightmare. Sometimes women need men to balance them out and stop them from killing each other.

[Rosexøxø]

lol that’s why it would be good to have both options then, no?

Can’t take away people’s options or preferences.

They don’t need men to balance. They either want to be around men or don’t. It can be an off day for any lady and either gender for her. It depends on her preferences. No need to be offended by any of it though, just seek out the inclusive events if that’s what you would like and engage with those also attending those events. If not then 🤷‍♀️

[Rosexøxø]

I don’t see why guys couldn’t have their event stuff too but at least at women events women don’t boast they’re better than men. Or speak derogatory or establishing themselves. They just enjoy the tasks at hand, talk of the celebs/ family/ world events, and enjoy just the conversation without one upping others or threatening others and all

[Levin]

@Rosexøxø Tbh, I generally don't like hanging around with men. Women are more sensitive, more emotionally intelligent and the male female dynamic is balancing for me personally.

[Rosexøxø]

Yeah I was going to say that but I was talking too much on this lol

They’re sensitive and these places offer something where they don’t have to compete. Sometimes they just want to chill with their guard down and be able to handle any conflict on a level one instead of bringing it up to ten or try to prove they have balls or something or try not to worry about offending a nice guy or encouraging a creep to persist with it.

There’s definitely some places where men and women get along and I like those places too. If the guys are respectful and don’t “look down” on women or something then I wouldn’t mind attending and letting the nice guys kind of defend and help de-escalate any situation with a problematic/confrontational guy. Definitely not all guys are yahoo lol but those places just helps women not have to use Al that mental energy/ appear tough/independent. Like just go in a messy bun and giggle with some lady about what someone wore to the met gala or something. Or talk about new year resolutions or the next event who knows? I don’t follow people around but that’s just my idea of it and also a bit of my personal take on it. I could’ve posted an opinion here but I just didn’t want to try and “prove” anything or be combative. I wasn’t looking for any mho or so. I’m just talkin and that’d be it lol 😂

Also sorry for any offense and

Sorry @goaded for hopping on your comment. Your first mention of the less hassle just resonated so I kinda added to it a bit 👀👀

Apologies lol

[goaded]

@Rosexøxø No worries, I have daughters!

[goaded]

One told me about having her hair touched by a man. How is that appropriate? Another came and stared at her for seven minutes before saying anything. She'd already told him he was being inappropriate and creepy. I hope next time she will warn them, then, if either is that stupid, she'll maim him.

I get not being able to read non-verbal cues, but if you're told not to talk to someone again, the only appropriate response is one "sorry".

[Levin]

@Rosexøxø by the way, I thought it worth adding that not only women suffer at the hands of men. I've been propositioned and even groped on a night out. That guy is seriously lucky that I didn't knock his teeth out.

[goaded]

Yeah, you had the ability to "knock his teeth out", most women don't.

[Levin]

@goaded Alright, don't blame me for that.

[Levin]

by the way, I only have that ability because I went to martial arts classes for about 10 years and train intensively for 8 hours a week. Most men have a good 3-5 stone on me.

[Levin]

Also, I am a pacifist, so I wouldn't actually hit anyone unless it was last resort.

[goaded]

Nor would my daughter, but she'd make it count.

[goaded]

And, no, I don't blame you for that, I'm just explaining what women feel they have to put up with.

[19magic]

@goaded I feel that, I went out with a mate and two guys just stared at us across the room for about 15 minutes. Then one walked up to us and said my friend thinks you're hot, (bearing in mind they were at least twice, if not three times our age). I said we weren't interested and we even walked into a different room, only to be followed by them, and it took about 30-40 mins before they finally got the point. But then I watched them in the corner of my eye, and anytime a girl looked a bit drunk they pretty much stalked her, so I made sure no girls were victims and kept an eye on them for the rest of the night.

Yet on another occasion was asked to dance with an older guy after a queen tribute. And we had a respectable ballroom type dance, was really sweet and everything and then he kissed me on the cheek said thanks for dancing with him and that I reminded him of dances with his daughter, (I really hope that didn't mean she was dead, just that it's rare), but it's a really heartfelt memory.

I know not all guys are the same, but at the same time every male friend I've ever had, has ended up making a move on me. So while I love having friendships with males, I don't let myself do it anymore as it gets depressing having to not be myself around certain people.

[goaded]

@19magic I'm sorry you have to deal with those things. (Have you ever seen When Harry met Sally?)

[jennifer_bloom]

One form of mixed group is amnesty international. It only meets a few times a season so is very low commitment but you meet people of both genders there. Google it to see if there are volunteer branches in your region.

[BlissfullyCurSed]

In short, they don't want you. You are not invited to their tea party.

[jahaims]

They want to do stuff without being hit on