How do some people never smile or laugh?

[Anonymous]

I have a couple of coworkers who never smile or laugh. The most they showed was a really tiny and brief wry smile, which I don’t count as a genuine smile (as if they’re just saying “who would’ve thought?”). They did it only once after hearing some jokes during our informal staff lunches. (And we actually have some comedians at work who always make jokes).

My non-smiling coworkers are both men, and each considers himself to be a tough guy. One is ex-military and the other is a devout cross country runner and coach.

I’m a guy and I smile and laugh. I think it’s healthy and a normal reaction, especially if the jokes are appropriate. (Don’t get me wrong, I can be really serious and tough at times too). But how is it that some people never smile or laugh? Are you or do you know anyone else like this? Is it just your personality? Is it a learned behavior? Does it take some conscious effort to not smile or laugh?

Updates

+1 y

Thank you all for your thoughts.

[Cool-Relax]

I used to be like that. For one thing, I was really shy. I was also bullied as a kid, so it became a defense mechanism around people I'm not close to. If people couldn't see my emotions, they would never know what was going through my mind or that they were getting to me, and I would never draw attention (my laugh is actually kind of loud lol). It became second nature for me, smiling and laughing are what took conscious effort. It's not that I was never happy as other people are suggesting in their answers, I just didn't show it. I'm better about it now, but it's still very difficult for people to read what I'm feeling, especially in a situation where I'm nervous.

I would wager to guess that your coworkers aren't just miserable people. Whether they're self-conscious, shy, or have a lot on their mind, everyone smiles at some point. Maybe they don't find work to be a particularly happy place.

[Anonymous]

I have some co-workers like that too. It drives me crazy! Like, lighten up a little! Some people are just like that. It is sad, but they are just miserable people and nothing can be done to make them happy.

I think part of it is-- they are just simply like that. And another part I think has to be what is going on in their lives and what has happened in their lives. (losing a loved one, a sick loved one, money problems, etc).

I think what you are describing is not a temporary miserable state, but a permanent one. In that case, I think people are just born that way. It's a shame because they are missing out on happiness.

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[Cyhhgg]

Hmmmm

I've ignored countless jokes people thought were funny, but it turns out they werent.

I'm a pretty happy dude and hardly laugh at shit.

Maybe you should consider that if someone's not laughing that it means you're not funny. Crazy right? I know. I had to wrap my head around the fact that people are different, but once you do, you won't share shit opinions like this.

Have a good day. ;)

[upood]

Some guys don't like their smile or don't feel normal smiling since theyre used to that sort of demeanor... its just their personality, they do laugh sometimes but it has to be super funny and they have to be super relaxed.

[srobe]

I generally don't smile a lot and bear an expression of almost annoyance even when I am not at all upset or annoyed by anything. I generally argue that there just isn't anything warranting me to smile, I can feel joy without having to make it apparent to everyone else. Other times I will say that I just look this way because I have a lot on my mind. Yet again, it doesn't have to be something bad or wrong, I just am focusing on something and don't have time to focus on looking pretty for others.

[Iamnobody]

i honestly have no idea how they live that way man. no matter how tough your life is, there's always room for a smile or a laugh.

[ImperfectDVM]

They may be going through a lot of stuff.

Yes, I do know people like that.

They may also be really deep thinkers, that are too deep in thought to laugh.

[palek]

Some people have inverted rectums! There ain't nothin funny about that.

[AskChloe]

Some people are just like that in general mister and misses grinches I assume.

[Moloch]

It's a personality thing I guess. Doesn't mean they're not happy though.

[BlancaPR87]

I am a girl and it's very rare when i show an honest, really smile. .. i am a happy person, i love life ... but i don't feel like laughing all the time or smiling.

[Anonymous]

Maybe they have nothing to smile about

[Anonymous]

Bad teeth?

[kat_gran]

alsoo! lol