Does my ex girlfriend miss me?

[irishfan86]

My ex broke up with me last November. We were together and extremely happy with each other for three year. I had to move for school and Army reasons. She was going to get a job and join me.

We tried working things out from January until she broke things off in late March. From Jan to March, she told me multiple times to have patience and that I wasn't just an option. We were going to get an apartment together and continue things where we left off.

Her birthday was two weeks after she told me she didn't want to talk to me. I didn't say anything to her that day because she had told me to go away and I was afraid any communication would push her further away. I have completely taken myself out of her life, off of social media, and have basically disappeared. It has been about six weeks now.

She has also got her own apartment since then. I think she may just be wanting to prove to herself that she can do things for herself (she has lived with her parents since 2008).

Since then, she has been posting quite a few quotes on her social media's, Facebook, Pinterest, Instagram, etc.. I'm not sure if these are about me or just general quotes, and I'm not sure if she misses me or is just trying to get a rise out of me. Some of the quotes she has posted include (in chronological order since breaking things off):

- "I love those random memories that make me smile no matter what is going on in my life right now."

- "Hey, remember the one person you thought you couldn't live without? Well, look at you, living and ****." (This was the day after her birthday).

- "Few are lucky to have the other half fit."

- "She acts like summer and walks like rain."

- "I didn't want to kiss you goodbye, that's the trouble, I wanted to kiss you goodnight, and there's a lot of difference."

- "She will cry and then get over it, she will hate you and then love you again, but one day she will leave you and she won't come back."

- "Absence makes the heart grow fonder, but it sure makes the rest of you lonely."

- "Not a day goes by without you on my mind."

Does she miss me? Is my absence really bothering her? Should I remain silent? Is her getting her own apartment a permanent end?

I know it's stupid and childish, but all I have to go off of is the things she posts on her social media's. Thanks for any advice or tips anyone can give.

Updates

+1 y

Correction to first paragraph:


I had to move two hours away for school and Army reasons. She was going to get a new job and relocate with me.

[tropics1989]

I can understand her feelings. She is sad without you, even though she left you. I'm sure she thought you'd come back into her life or at the very least acknowledge her & let her know you still care (IF you still do care). Instead you disappeared off the face of the earth like a moron (sorry to be harsh). You are hiding from her .. Why? If you cared for her at all you wouldn't hide or "disappear". She'll get over you much quicker when you just "disappear". I went through this. Your situtation is identical to what happen to me. In fact, you are doing what my ex did and because of it he stayed an EX. Leaving due to the army, disappeared off the face of the earth, blah blah. Sounds exactly like my ex did .. hey, would you happen to have a motorcycle BTW (JK). Then one day after disappearing for a few months he tried to come back into my life. You know what I said, "you disappeared now do it again and I slammed the door in his face. I thought he'd moved on and didn't care anymore because of his lack of communication, lack of acknowledgment, lack of everything. Don't get me wrong I'm not heartless I was very sad after I broke up with him, I felt rejected by him because he disappeared but due to his disappearing act he'd unknowingly made it so much easier for me get over him, even though I was the one who initiated the break-up in the first place. To answer your questions - it sounds like she misses you but her quote "She will cry and then get over it, she will hate you and then love you again, but one day she will leave you and she won't come back" she's slowly getting over you. Your silence is forcing her to move on whether you know it or not especially after 6 weeks and especially after not acknowledging her birthday .. that was a BIG mistake on your part. Yes your absence is bothering her it. If you care and you want her to be yours you will not remain silent, and getting her own apartment is not a permanent end. It is her showing responsibility and growing up. When I got my own apartment my ex bf(was a boyfriend then) was very worried because I did not have parents to give me a curfew, my parents wouldn't be able to control who can and cannot come over, or what I could and could not do. Having your own place is the ultimate freedom and an ultimate test of trust when it comes to relationships. Quite honestly you should be their with her.

[irishfan86]

Well, the reason I am living two hours away is that I had to chose between going to school or going to Afghanistan and I just wanted to progress my career and not leave her. I didn' say happy birthday because she got flowers from someone else and told everyone how great he is, and she told me to go away. What is the best way to not remain silent? she made it very clear that she didn't want to talk to me anymore. I waited for 5 months for her to decide on us and she left me like it was no big deal

[irishfan86]

Also, I'm not really hiding from her, I'm giving her the space she desired. Her last text to me was "Go away, get over it." I want to run to her, but am afraid that that will only push her further away.

So my question to you is: Why did you leave him, try to work things out, and then leave him again? (If your story is the same as mine? Did he disappear after you broke things off the second time?)

What should I do? She is my world and my future..

[irishfan86]

Oh, forgot to answer this as well. I can't just be with her in her own apartment. When I left, I had to move two hours away. She was going to join me, but the job search and other things went sour. When we tried to work things out, she gave the job search another go. Instead, she decided to stay two hours away, and got her own apartment there. If I could be with her at her apartment, we wouldn't be in our situation to begin with. Hope this helps you give proper advice.

[QueenBeatris]

yes ,u should stay gone until she reaches out,she probably put that stuff on there to see if you bite,don't do it,make her come to u

[irishfan86]

what do you make of her getting her own apartment? and what reaction do you think she is having to me not reacting to anything?

[QueenBeatris]

like you mentioned she had been living with her parents and is now on her own..the fact that you are not reacting is probably making her wonder..keep her in suspense,she will reach out eventually

[irishfan86]

i kind of figured she wants to prove independence to herself, but why push the one person who waited for her and loves her more than himself away? You think she'll reach out, even with having a new apartment and everything? Are all the quotes just to get a rise out of me or does she still have feelings for me and miss me?

[QueenBeatris]

I think its a little bit of both..she figures if she posts it you will react and you did,not towards her but here you are,it worked,don't let her see that,let her realize how lonely life is without her boyfriend who loves and cares for her,

[irishfan86]

I guess her getting an apartment so far from me just feels really permanent. She's also very stubborn, so I'm not sure what to think.

[QueenBeatris]

she doesn't sound very nice,u do on the other hand

,she did you a favor actually now you can give a real woman a chance to share the same feelings with u

[irishfan86]

i don't think its a matter of not being nice. I think its more indecisive, confused and wanting to prove herself to herself. I just don't know why I get left hanging. If she didn't care at all, would there be any quotes and such like the ones she has been posting?

[QueenBeatris]

I think she misses you for sure

[irishfan86]

so why not approach me or call me?

[QueenBeatris]

maybe she's not ready quite yet

[irishfan86]

how can you tell she misses me?

[QueenBeatris]

her posts sound like it

[irishfan86]

they seem to be getting less and less cryptic and more straight forward. think that will continue? even with moving into her own apt?

[QueenBeatris]

why don't you text her hello see how she reacts

[irishfan86]

because I know I won't get a reaction... this sucks

[QueenBeatris]

idk what to tell you then

[irishfan86]

well, you told me to not give her anything, to let her get lonely, and to make her come to me. so that's really all I can do.

[budphillips]

Social media has made us all cowards and completely void of social skills. If she can't talk to you about how she's feeling and has to post passive-aggressive song quotes on social media, you probably don't want to date her.

[irishfan86]

she's posted quotes that are relavent to her all throughout our relationship, so I'm not surprised she still does. I'm just looking to see if I'm doing the right thing and giving her a world without me. I can't tell if she just wants a rise out of me or if she legit misses me and just wants to do her own thing (plus she's stubborn as hell) and doesn't want my influence.

[budphillips]

You can't know. I would recommend just ignoring it and stop noticing it.

[irishfan86]

think it's the wanting independence stage? I can understand that, but I'm not sure why she has to push me out of her life to do it.

[budphillips]

Every relationship and every individual is different. You can't know what she's thinking...none of us can. We can speculate all day but it won't do anything. I'd recommend moving on.

[Anonymous]

It seems that she really does miss you a lot with sincerity.

Try to meet up with her in person one more time and see if it will work out.

[irishfan86]

The only thing with that is that we live two hours apart now. And also, I fear that me trying to talk to her will only push me further away. I would love the opportunity to meet with her, but we need to talk again first I think.