A Florida man has been arrested after trying to escape from America by running across the Atlantic to London in a giant hamster wheel. This raises the obvious question, since London is north of Florida is it harder to walk up hill across the ocean?
But what of you? Would you like to walk across the sea in a hamster wheel?
Would you like to run across the ocean in a hamster wheel?
As Roosterbreast watched the man run across the sea, he couldn't help but notice a familiar fascination burning within his soul. @BoobSlayer's passion for those succulent fruits known as melons and their sisters, titties, boobies, tits, milkers, boobies - all those delightful morsels that decorate our world - had become a consuming flame. It was as if he had become a beckoned moth, drawn by the irresistible glow, and he was determined to follow this path. As he ran across the vast ocean on his journey towards the land of boobies and milkshakes, @BoobSlayer's eyes gleamed with the promise that he might one day possess these divine treasures. And thus, the adventure continued as the horizon of his dreams stretched ever near. ﾠ
To begin unraveling this enigma, we must first question the sanity, or lack thereof, of a man who would embark on such a journey. For starters, why would anyone in his right mind go to England? There's nothing there but rain, fish, chips, and bad teeth. Secondly, an American would not exit his SUV to obtain fast food, much less walk/run anywhere. I find this highly unlikely.
Nevertheless, Boobslayer shall endeavor to stay focused on the matter at hand - the uphill journey across the ocean. Ah, the notion of walking uphill, a concept that takes us back to our youthful days of infatuation with boobs, mammory glands, boobies...
... and the glorious realm of mesmerizing milkers, oozing with sweet breast milk.
But I digress. The question posed suggests that London, being north of Florida, presents a challenge when traversing the ocean. Indeed, the geographical incline one would face if attempting to walk from Florida to London is an intriguing concept, just as one might be intriqued by @cousin_stacey 's marvelous gazoongas.
Physics and common sense remind us that the ocean itself is not characterized by labeled hills or discernible slopes. Instead of bumpy terrain, we are confronted with the vast expanse of water that ebbs and flows like the temptress of the tides, her oversized snuggle puppies shrouded in mystery. It is here that we must accept the undeniable fact that the notion of walking uphill across the ocean is, dare I say, anatomically impossible.
However, let us indulge in a bit of boobilicious imagination for a moment, shall we? Picture the scene - our adventurous Florida man, equipped with an oversized hamster wheel, valiantly attempting to conquer this insurmountable endeavor. The image of a rolling wheel across the tumultuous ocean waves, powered by sheer determination and the mighty strength of the human spirit, is both mesmerizing and absurd. As waves crash against the hamster wheel, threatening to wash away any rational thought, we must marvel at the fortitude of the human spirit.
But, alas, this noble endeavor is in vain. The laws of physics, like the spectacular beauty of honkers and bazookas, cannot be ignored.
While we appreciate Florida man's audacity, we must acknowledge that swimming skills or other alternative methods of traversing the ocean would be far more suitable. One might suggest a boat, a plane, or perhaps even harnessing the power of technology to effortlessly fly across the Atlantic.
These practical solutions may lack the quirkiness and audaciousness of a hamster wheel journey but rest assured, dear readers, they are far more likely to lead to success. Suffice it to say that Boobslayer, who cannot resist being captivated by the allure of coocunutes, thinks that walking uphill across an ocean is a whimsical notion that crumbles under the weight of scientific facts.
The journey of our Florida man, though undoubtedly filled with quirks and curiosity, would undoubtedly be more feasible if he were to explore alternative means of transportation. So let us bid adieu to dreams of walking uphill across the ocean, and instead, embrace the wonders of chesticles, be they in London, Florida, or any corner of this enchanting world.
Sounds more like a publicity stunt. No one could cross the ocean in that as it doesn't carry enough supplies and is open to waves and any type of weather, good or bad.
He was arrested by the USCG. He actually threatened the bordering party with a knife and said he had a bomb. He did not have a bomb and he eventually surrendered.
Fuck no, and why do people have the need to do something like that? To be the first person to walk across an ocean, or first person to … fill in the blank. Unless you have a support team and would not put pressure on coast guard or lifesaving resources, then i suppose go for it. Seems ridiculously stupid to me
I read the affidavit against this guy and it aggravates me a bit. He was 70 NM offshore when a USCG cutter intercepted him, which is well beyond the max 24 NM Territorial water limits (12NM from two land points out to a max 24 NM), but within the EEZ.
There is no question the guy is a nut and I guess they did him a favor, but I hope the charges are thrown out due to lack of jurisdiction.
I don't know that story. Was he really going to try for England? That would be several thousand miles. That thing would mostly just spin in the water and move very, very, very slowly. He would not have made it.
His best bet would have been the Bahamas or Bermuda.
Why did they arrest him? Was he already wanted for something or did they just say he wasn't "allowed" to make his water craft?
Would be fun but too long of a trip that way, the ocean is level everywhere so it doesn’t matter there is no uphill or downhill. but why arrest him? How do they know where he was going or from until he gets there? Hope it doesn’t deflate either
LMAO - I especially love the "This raises the obvious question, since London is north of Florida is it harder to walk up hill across the ocean? ...Part!
It kinda a cool idea but logically I see problems and be very hard to get there and dangerous. Also it’s gets really cold at night, storms, and waves. It also take a long time to get there.
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Anonymous
(45 Plus)
+1 y
He's just trying to escape the Biden Administration's surveillance. He's going to be real disappointed when he discovers that the UK is the most surveilled country in the "free world".
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