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bond_007
(Age:18 to 24)
When: Over a year ago
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supposing that your clothes are a bit provocative would you do it just for him, because you love him
Update: to make things clearer, I won't do such thing just to control her, I don't have this kind of problems, and it also depends on where we were going, dressing for the movies is different from dressing to a party, plus I'm not gonna tell her: hey girl! listen from now on you're not wearing these clothes anymore. NO, I'll sit with her and explain to her why I'm asking this from her, so that she'll be understanding and compliant,
Over a year ago
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Update: another thing is that some of you girls said that why would he ask you to do this after dating for a long time, well for me I would ask her this from the beginning. also some of you said why would I date her from the beginning, as I said to "knowmeyourself" some girls are great from every aspect except the way they dress, it doesn't suit me or my community,
Over a year ago
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Update: oops, updated twice the same thing, anyway in case not all of you girls read the guys answers, well take a look on them, specially the dudes who answered anon (with long answers) and "FrancoBattiato", actually they helped in expressing my point of view, you girls don't know how we guys think, it's not just a matter of pursuiting the trend, there's more into it, and for the girls who answered with Yes (they would change), I tell you your boyfriends are lucky to have you :)
Over a year ago
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| Girls if your boyfriend asked you to dress more conservatively, would you do it for him? |
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What Girls Said
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2174
I would consider it...but I mean I don't dress THATTT provocative..It sorta depends on how long you have been with your boyfriend.
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32590
If I get anymore conservative I'll be wearing a burqa, so no.
if he asked me to, I don't know if I'd change my ENTIRE wardrobe, it depends what I was wearing at the time, where I was going and if I felt like it or not. it depends on what he's talking about. my version of his "provocative" could differ from his. I had one boyfriend who would get mad if I wore makeup, spent time on my hair or wore cute clothes when he wasn't with me. that wasn't cool and I didn't change then.
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1207
OMG why do people keep repeating the word CONTROLLING! if a man doesn't like the way his woman dresses in a particular time doesn't mean he is controlling. it means he cares for her. A controlling man would be someone who would force you to do something.
If my man wanted to come outside shirtless, or topless I would immediately ask him to put on a shirt or t-shirt. WHY? I don't want him bothering the eyes of single women out there who can't get a man who is attractive. I also don't want women drooling over him. and I don't want him attracting unwanted attention.
Obviously for a man, there is more to what I just said above. they are men, they are hardwired to protect their woman.
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13814
I already dress conservatively so it would be no big deal to me. And yeah, if he asked, I would do it for him even though I do hate being told what to do normally.
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8932
No.
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3977
Yes, I'd definitely do it :) As long as we both love each other I'm willing to compromise :)
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3523
It depends. If what I'm wearing is actually very skanky and makes him honestly uncomfortable yes but if he's just being controlling then no. You need to compromise in relationships but there is a line where asking becomes demanding.
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9738
Nope. I'd dump him. It's my body, I'll wear what I want. F***what he thinks.
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28715
I would tell him to f*** off, but it's good to know the truth about what he thinks about my clothes.. A better approach would to take me shopping and say "I think you would look beautiful in this (insert conservative outfit)"
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0
Yes. But I would want to know the exact reasons as to why they way I dress concerns him. If it's because he thinks I'm trying to attract other men, I would be disgusted that he would have such a low opinion of me. If it is simply because he finds me more attractive in more , or he is concerned for my public appearance, I would take note.
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1850
um yea she shouldn't be dress that way to much anyway... she's suppose to show you all the goods.
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31891
I might humor him a little bit, within reason, just because I like making my dude happy and I value his feelings. I occasionally wear certain things I own more often just because I know he likes them. But at the end of the day, I wear what I want/like and I don't need anyone's permission to do it because I'm an adult, and my own person. He knew how I dressed when he decided to date me.
That being said though, my dude doesn't have any issues with what I wear, no matter how much leg I'm showing, or if you can see a little cleavage. He likes and comments on my quirky clothing choices, lol. So this isn't really a problem for me. And I don't dress all that provocatively anyway. Like my boobs aren't popping out all over the place, and I only have bare legs when I wear shorts. With skirts, especially short ones, I pretty much always wear tights of some sort. I'm not a big fan of totally exposing my body to strangers, lol.
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-1
Tough question.
On the one hand, I'd hate to think that my boyfriend is trying to control me. I like how I dress (which isn't particularly provocative to begin with) and don't think I need to change it. But, at the same time, I don't want to make someone I care about uncomfortable. If he told me about why he was uncomfortable with the way I dress and what he wants me to change, and I found it reasonable - yes, I would do it for him.
However, if he expects me to dress like a nun then I'd tell him no. When I go out I dress up. I don't do it for looks or attention, I do it because it makes me feel good about myself to get dolled up every now and then. I'd want my partner to know that I am in a relationship with him, and at the end of the day it's him I'm coming home to. I don't flirt nor encourage flirting, I just wear what I want and pay no mind to what other people think of me.
There is a lot more to me than the way I dress, so I wouldn't think he's trying to "change me". I'd just be wary of how far he'd take it if I allowed this concession.
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N/A
I dress pretty conservative but if I dressed provocatively and my man asked me not to anymore I'd say no. I'd feel like I'm being controlled and told what to do, I left my Daddy at home. If you met her dressing provocatively, then accept her for the way she dresses. You can't change a Zebra's stripes. Also, if it really bothers you, say it in a polite way and how you feel about it. You have to truly look at how she dresses what is so provocative about her dressing then ask yourself if it attracted you in the beginning, why is it bothering you now?
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1837
Nope. I'd leave him though.
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8606
he doesn't like the way I dress then he shouldn't be with me. that would be changing who I am
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-1
Nope, he chose me, clothes and all. I guess if it's been more than a year, but then again why would he ask me to change after all that time? I don't like being controlled and I love how I dress, if he 'loved me' (which I think is a bs argument) he would let me dress how I want. Ya know it's funny how the guys are saying they're 'just clothes', if that's the case then why make us change them :)
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-1
I already dress pretty conservatively, and if I dressed anymore conservatively I'd be uncomfortable so no.
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6180
If she dresses like some skank and looks like she's dressed to go clubbing all the time, then I wouldn't be surprised if he expected that of her. Have any of you seen what some girls wear out and about? It's not about fashion, it's dressing like a hooker to go grocery shopping. Some girls take "slutty" and confuse it with "cute."
However, if she wears something decent and it happens to show off a little cleavage, so what?
It would really depend on what she's actually wearing that you consider "provocative" and what you consider conservative. It you mean going from skanky to more modest and classy, then I'd think it would be a reasonable request. However, if she's dressed relatively well and you expect her to go nun status, eff that noise.
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603
hmmm..it depends on how conservative he is talking about and why. I wouldn't like my boyfriend trying to change the way I dress
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93
No I wouldn't, just like I wouldn't ask him to change his style! I would of said this is who I'm and how I like to dress.
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-1
No, I wouldn't dress 'more conservatively' for a boyfriend if he asked me to. Everyone has a different opinion of what constitutes conservative v. provocative clothing and everything in-between.
I like my body so I'm not going to wear a poncho but on the same token, you won't ever find me in a skin tight dress and sky high stilettos unless it's on the rare occasion I go out clubbing with girls to have a good time, not to hook up. I don't dress like a hooker, and my style is usually casual, involving jeans and a nice fitted top.
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4118
Mmm. If I had a boyfriend and he asked me to dress more conservatively, I'd probably want to talk and find out exactly what he wants. I would respect him a hell of a lot more if he sat me down to talk about it first. I don't think I'll ever have that problem, though. I am as modest as can be whilst still flattering my body. Honestly, I'd be more concerned about *him* showing more skin than myself. I'm a recovering compulsive picker, so, I really can't have my skin showing much.
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100
I guess it would depend on the reason. I would have to say yes though.
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402
Probably only when I'm with him. Unless there was a big chance we'd end up getting married. Otherwise I wouldn't bother fully changing how I look.
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N/A
It depends. I don't really feel comfortable dressing a bit provocative in public. I already dress conservatively. My style is a bit like: slight baggy jeans, slightly larger sweaters, tee shirts, tank tops. It's not really sloppy, I wear it in a fashionable way. If he doesn't think that's enough then I might find him a bit controlling.
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N/A
it depends how provocative were talking here, I guess everyone has their own definition guys especially some think a woman is dressing like a slut but in reality she may be a fashionista and just enjoying fashion trends...ive seen it happen last spring lace shirts were in style and in fashion and this pretty girl in my class wore it with skinny jeans, all the girls thought she was pretty and complimented her asking where she got her shirt from, and the guy sitting behind me was talking to his bud saying she's a slut and making sexual remarks...i mean she was wearing a tanktop underneath just because its lace and fashion doesn't make her a slut? she had a boyfriend too by the way so its not like she was out to get male attention.
some girls like to dress up just for their boyfriend so why would you want her to dress like a bum? its supposed to be a compliment to you.
also I know a Muslim girl her boyfriend asked her to be more conservative and she dumped him. I feel bad for Muslim women because their bfs/husbands whatever aways want them wearing burqas and sh*t its so sad and going against human rights,
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411
yes. because it makes sense. no guy wants his prize showin off her bod to the rest of the world. it's his now. if any girl doesn't agree - think of it this way... if your man was walkin around with his shirt off in front of all these people, would you like it? absolutely not. so ;P
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20940
If he intends to buy me a collection of burkas to wear I might just consider it.
I don't dress at all provocatively, so if he asked me to dress in a more conservative manner I'd be rather shocked and offended.
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1353
that would depend on the extent to which he meant conservitive I'm not going to start wearing turtleneck shirts and long sleeves with baggie pants all the time to keep myself covered but if its with in reason then of course I would.
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4090
Yes, of course I would. I would expect him to cut out things that made me uncomfortable as well though.
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2563
if I dressed like a skank in order to get boyfriends and I now had a boyfriend, id dress down for him. if I dressed like a skank because I love male attention in general regardless of my boyfriend status, then id continue dressing skanky. I'm assuming your girl dressed a bit provocative eh?
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5793
yes I would
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-1
Maybe for a day or two but then I'd go back dressing to how I want to dress. He'd just have to deal with it... if he didn't like my clothes to begin with he shouldn't be with me :p
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1207
Yes!
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N/A
yes. I have to respect his wishes as well
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494
Yes, definitely. As long as he was being legit, and there actually was a problem with my clothing choices. I would want him to feel comfortable in the relationship as well.
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9012
Of course! The fact that I loved him, I would do anything to make him happy :) P.S- I don't even dress bad..but, my Boyfriend didn't like me wearing shirts that 'revealed' but, I totally agreed with him. I am only his took look at :) So, I never did :)
best wishes xx
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13138
If he was right and I did dress too provocative, then I would. but if he's being too paranoid and controlling, I wouldn't. I wouldn't like him telling me how to dress.
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460
I would but I don't dress like a whore so it's kind of a moot point
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-1
No. He doesn't get to tell me how to dress. I wear what I want to wear and I don't care what he thinks. If he truly cares, then he will accept me and not let something as superficial as clothes get in the way of anything. I'm not listening to that "I'll do it because I love you" bullsh*t. That is just some ploy guys try to use to get what they want! If he really loves me, then he will put his own selfish ideas aside and let me be the indvidiual that I am.
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2055
My boyfriend HAS asked me to do this...it's just that he's asked me to change a lot of other things, too, so I feel like he's being too controlling. So my answer is no. I don't think he should want to change me. I don't dress extremely provocatively, but I like to look good, and sometimes I just want to wear a pair of yoga pants. I don't think the way I dress is un-tasteful, so I don't want to change.
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2369
depends on the reason. even if I love the guy, if it's for insecurity reasons and/or the fact that he doesn't trust me to ignore other guys and he doesn't realize that if I am dressing a certain provocative way, it's for HIM and not anyone else, then that's his problem. I don't dress that way, but if I started dating a guy I really liked, I would show off my curves and stuff whenever I'm out with him, for him. If he doesn't like that because of untrue reasons, then he isn't the guy for me.
however, if he just wants to see me dress a certain way because he likes it better and he thinks I look better in it, (depending on how he puts it), I would be willing to make compromises and dress a little more for his liking.
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N/A
woah...insecure much.
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374
I don't dress provocatively, but If I did, I think I would..
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3435
Yes I would.
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14188
Since I don't really dress 'provocatively', I'd think that he was being weirdly controlling. So, no, I wouldn't. And I preferably wouldn't be in a relationship with someone who asked me to.
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-1
Probably not... It has nothing to do with how much I love him, it's just that whatever reason he has for wanting me to dress more conservatively is probably immature. We could sort it out in a way that doesn't involve me being controlled. If he's feeling jealous or insecure, dressing more conservatively is only a temporary solution. You've got to get to the root of the problem.
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1993
I already dress conservatively relative to my culture and place.
I refuse however to fold to crazy religious beliefs.
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1933
My boyfriend would never ask me to change. Ever. If he loved me, he'd love me for me and wouldn't try and change my style. If you can't handle her style, don't date her.
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17365
It depends on what he considers provocative. I don't dress that way so it shouldn't be a big deal.
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N/A
It depends how long we have been together and whether I feel like it or not. I dress modestly anyway so if he asked me to dress MORE conservatively then I'd be like Hell no. But if I did dress a little hoochie (which I will once I lose the lbs!) then I MIGHT consider what he has to say. At the same time, if he started dating me when I dressed a certain way, why now is he asking me to change?
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13787
If you presented a logical argument, you might be able to convince me. I won't rule anything out.
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55964
I already dress modestly/conservatively, so that wouldn't be an issue.
I'm also not one to be controlled. I wouldn't enter into a relationship with someone and then try to change how they dress or their style, so why would I allow someone to do what I wouldn't? So no. Although again, it's not an issue for me because I don't believe in dressing provocatively
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5087
I would, if he had a good reason and he wasn't trying to control me, just wanting me to cover up a bit so other guys don't drool over me and stuff. I totally understand that and would be fine with it.
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5042
Nope and I'd be worried if he had jealousy issues. However, you could say, "Hun, what you're wearing is so hot! You should seriously consider toning it down otherwise I'll have a really hard time paying attention to you instead of your hot body when we are dating.". She'll get the point and you won't seem insecure/ controlling.
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13984
I don't know. It's tricky - on principle - I'd say no. If you're dating me, you're dating me for me and if you don't like it you don't like me - and they way I dress is a part of who I am.
But honestly it's hard for me to say because although I don't dress conservatively, I don't dress at all provocatively either, so if a guy asked me to change the way I dress; I'd worry mostly that he had serious paranoia issues. But that aside, I wouldn't do it because I don't feel that they way I dress is in any way indecent, or demeaning of our relationship in terms of me outwardly trying to attract other men.
That being said, if I put on something to go out in - and my 'boyfriend' asked me to change because it was a bit revealing. Then sure, probably I would. I wouldn't mind a guy having a problem with me wearing certain things at certain times - but if he asked me to completely change the way I dressed at all times, then no, I wouldn't do it.
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24159
Girls if your boyfriend asked you to dress more conservatively, would you do it for him? No
would you do it just for him, because you love him? No and if love is his bs excuse to guilt trip me into following his controlling behavior I'd inform him I shouldn't have to change myself or do things to suit him to prove my love right before dumping him
Then I'd laugh because guys are always whining about how girls try to change them LMAO XD
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-1
My ex told me one time "why don't you wear heels and tie your hair up for me?" I told him I don't like heels or to tie my hair up. He made me angry, so if you want your girl to dress the way you want her to, she won't be with you much longer.
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14314
No. Mr. Muffin Loves me for who I am.
He would never say sh*t like that to me.
He loved me with or without the powdered sugar.
He love me for me.
If he asked for me to stop wearing powdered sugar...I will have to get a divorce...because that wouldn't seem like the guy I loved before. It is like he would be trying to change who I am...But he already knows..I love wearing powdered sugar...so it would seem odd.
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0
i would. I wouldn't say that the boyfriend is controlling, they just don't want their girl to be exposed or they don't feel commfortable with them dressing so immodestly.! I totally understand why a guy would want their girl covered up.
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5391
Yeah I don't mind
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N/A
What's the reason of getting into a relationship with a girl that you assume to love and then try to change her?
I dress conservatively by the way. It's not the point.
I accept the guy the way he is.
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What Guys Said
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34430
I don't see why I'd be telling her how to dress in general lol. It's just gonna come off eventually anyways :D :P
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-1
If you would like to have her do something for you, you should not use your love for her to threaten her in order to do it. The correct way to go about this would be to simply say, "I don't feel comfortable going out with you like that". If she's compliant, she'll change. I guess what I'm saying is, say it at your own risk.
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N/A
Would you girls get mad if your boyfriend checked out a girl who was dressed like a street walker? I'm sure you would. No woman dresses like that to be classy, they want the attention and if my attention isn't enough, then she can go and find it somewhere else. Its also funny when girls at clubs show all that cleavage and get pissed at guys for staring. Don't want unwanted attention? Then don't draw unwanted attention to youself.
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-1
You say "love". If she really loved him, in the real sense of the word "love", then of course she'd do it. If she didn't really love him, then it's iffy. Some girls would change, others would think he was too controlling. If he had a good reason, she should change - like, if she dressed REALLY provocatively then she should change. She's not single and shouldn't be trying to get the attention of guys in a sexual way, just as neither person in the relationship should be flirting with other people. But if she wasn't really dressed that provocatively and just maybe showing a bit of thigh or cleavage, there's no reason to ask her to change and she probably wouldn't change. Hope that makes sense.
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N/A
I find most of the responses here funny. because over 50% of these woman most likely complain about their man looking and checking out and flirting with other woman. Why? Its because How they are f***ing dressed.
If you dress like a clubbing skank all the time and you have a Boyfriend then somethings wrong with you. Your purposely dressing that why because you like the attention you get. You shouldn't be with someone if you need attention from everyone else. And its even worse if you have male "friends" and dress like your single. Don't advertise if the shop is not open.
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4723
Wait your complaining that she dresses to much like a slut? I though all guys would want that unless your a Muslim
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-1
Honestly, I hate that conversation so I basically avoid it by not dating girls whom dress provocatively to begin with.
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-1
yes
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6917
A lot of the girls answers here are the typical feminist response they've been programmed with these days. I have once asked my girl to wear jeans instead of a skirt. She asked why and I just said it'd make me feel better. Now immediately I bet you think it's primitave jealousy or trying to 'change you' (they're f***ing clothes, grow up, you wear a suit to a job interview). She said yes without any more questions but if she did ask I would have told her the truth.
It wasn't to control her, or to 'change her' (still laughing at the bs of that lol), it was to protect her. Like a man is supposed to do of his woman. No, I do not agree that a woman is responsible if she gets raped while wearing something very provocative, but if you think that wearing that provocative thing isn't increasing your chances of rape then you are mentally retarded. I asked her to wear jeans because it'd be a lot easier for a rapist to get at a girl wearing a skirt than a girl wearing jeans and that fact alone could deter someone. That is why it would make me feel better.
BA so all the moronic 'he's trying to change me' girls can see it.
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N/A
Bitches will be bitches.
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14830
hmmm good question...i know why you would ask that, so she doesn'get looked at and droolled over by other guys, totatlly understandable. Personally if she dressed slutty, I wouldn't be with her in the first place, so this wouldn't be an issue any ways. However if she asked me to do the same thing and if she could make a good argument about it, then I woud change clothes as well. There is nothing wrong with receiving constructive judgement and suggestions, the problem starts when she starts to boss me around and telling me what I should and I shouldn't do, my ex was like that and she was really annoying, my friend is like that too and she really pisses me off when she does that.
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8602
If it was my girlfriend, she wouldn't- and would be pissed if I asked her to stay her style. But then again my girl is different, she treats everything like a business.
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10418
it makes perfect sense to me, if she is good material she would understand. :)
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14894
I once had a Mrs who said I needed to dress 'less thuggishly'... guess how long she lasted
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16005
I would think they might but also it would seem like the boyfriend is controlling.
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Girls if your boyfriend asked you to dress more conservatively, would you do it for him?
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