Avoid eye contact?

There's a guy who avoids eye contact with me. I kind of like him.

Its not like he is focusing his attention elsewhere, or that he isn't "maintaining" eye contact (because then I'd figure it was disinterest, dislike, what have you)... he just doesn't MAKE it at all.

Its almost more like he's "lowering the gaze" like Muslim women are to do to be "modest". But, no, he is no Muslim woman. He's a 20-something American male. He remains polite and nice... friendly even, he's just not looking me in the eye.

One time he did look me in the eye, and I ended up looking away... because I am shy. I don't know if that's his reason or not though. I have tried to make eye contact with him but I'm not really sure who looks away first - me or him.

There have been things which have made me question his attraction (touching my lower back, doing favors, being concerned or a little protective, quieter when there are more people around especially ones he knows, flashing his eyebrows, etc.)

But I'm wondering about the avoidance of eye contact... people seem to think its dislike. I at least know that he doesn't dislike me. He's never, ever rude to me. But beyond knowing what it DOESN'T mean, I have no idea. Thanks!


Most Helpful Guy

  • He likes you, it can be a sign of submissiveness to you, he thinks that you are beautiful, but he is afraid that you will notice it, because he doesn't know what you would think. So he tries to be polite and friendly to you, because that's the easiest way of confronting you.

    Or maybe he is shy overall, that looking into peoples eyes is a thing that needs trust and respect. Maybe he is scared of putting trust into someone or expose himself the way you do when looking into someones eyes, eye-to-eye.

    Either of these two things are kinda basic childish behaviours, things that needs to develop to some more social and open "expressions", even if he is 20y something.

    I know I were like this myself when I was younger, I was aware of it too and soon I trained it away.

    I would definately not say that he dislikes you, because then he would show it in a another way, probably ignore you. He likes you, but are somewhat shy in front of you.

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      I guess that's what confused me, because he doesn't seem that shy. He's not much of a conversationalist (compared to the other guys he works with that I know as well), but he normally doesn't seem nervous. There was a guy in yesterday who had a conversation with him... he seemed a bit awkward about actually talking to someone (he doesn't even really talk to his coworkers), but he was at least able to look him in the eye =/