Girls Beware! Why Guys Keep Exes As Friends?

[Littletad]

Ever wonder why your ex takes the time to keep in touch with you, and sometimes seems more determined to keep connected than rather working on getting back together with you?

It's simple, because he wants easier access to sex.!

Think about it, for the majority of girls, sex isn't something that a guy can achieve in under an hour. Unless you are both drunk and at a party. But for the most part, sex involves a lot of work. This mostly involves dinner, casual "get to know" conversations, and other activities.

Remember how nice he used to be? He'll play that card again.

So yep, it's quite a bit of work, and it's not really easy on the wallet either. So this brought out a nice little idea in the ever-growing cleverness of the male brain, "Why not try to get in touch with the ex".

Chances are, and most likely, girls take much longer to get over their ex.

This is the part where the ex can take advantage. Remember how nice he used to be? Well he'll play that card again. The "how you been" and "you look great" bit. While this still involves a little work, it certainly isn't as demanding as meeting someone new. With a few "hopeful" lines such as, "I still love you" or "I still care about you", he's hoping this will reinvigorate your feelings for him.

The next step is sex. And the basic "score" for the guys. Most likely an ex girlfriend will feel that having sex with her old boyfriend will drive him back to her. Wrong. The obvious reason is this. Men will seek out the easiest and most practical way to have sex.

If you ever truly want to get over an ex, lose all contact with him.

So remember this ladies, if you ever truly want to get over an ex, lose all contact with him in order to get over him. Otherwise he'll play the "easier relation" card.

"It's far easier and cheaper to go back to familiarity than it is to start anew".

[aliciaxx]

This is true for guys who only date girls for sex/looks in the first place. If a guy was ever truly in love with a girl he wouldn't do that to her. Unless he's immature and/or a total douche bag. In that case the girl would probably have broken up with him because of that realization. So unless she wants easy relations too, she wouldn't accept. Unless of course she is immature and/or a bitch too. You're article only applies to boys that no self-respecting woman would want to date anyway.

[Littletad]

You're 16, or perhaps older. My perspective is on guys who keep their ex's as friends, only for easier relations later. You'll notice I immediately square out a guy who seems to be keen on connecting in physical relations, rather than actually working to get back together in a real relationship. Therefore I'm not labeling ALL men to be pigs. Read up first, before making accusations.

[StingRayxoxo]

Interesting! Thanks for sharing.

[JustaLoozer]

Maybe this is true for some guys, but only the shallow, animalistic ones. My boyfriend was still friends with his ex when we got together. He hated being with her as all they did was fight, and the relationship lasted less than two months. They were good as friends, though. He is waiting until marraige for sex as well, so for my guy at least, kepping the ex in sex is not for him, and i'm sure there are plenty of similar guys.

There are guys out there like this, so good warning, but it's jot a one size fits all

[taleswapper]

Here's the thing. The reason you two liked each other's company BEFORE you formed a romantic attachment still applies. If it wasw common interests, you still have them. If it was she's great eye-candy, that's still true. If it was you enjoyed her company, you are still going to enjoy it, once you're no longer butthurt.

Unless your ONLY reason to date someone is for the sex, that person is still the kind, funny, fun person you were happy to spend time with. Don't throw away that just because you aren't getting your dick inside her now.

[Hurlyburly]

I kind of doubt that that's the reason my ex is still friends with me. Our relationship is over 11 years ago and we didn't had any kind of physical contact ever since. It took us about 2 years after the breakup to be able to become friends again but it does work out just fine.

[midnightmoon05]

i learned/read this on GAG... about all the crazy types of relationships... makes me feel i dont fit into this society..
i also learned in real life.. some do not see sex as part of love/intimate act.
i have only met men who are decent to not keep ex for sexual benefits.
prehaps, i knew how to sort out men with diff. qualities/diff. value.

[lovelylife]

I totally agree with you. When girls ask questions because they want to know what's going on with the ex and why he's trying to keep in touch. They think that the ex still has feelings for them.

Pay close attention lady's. He doesn't have feelings for you if he did you guys would still be together. What he is doing is keeping you close for easy access. It has nothing to do with love.

[benzelizabeth]

what makes you think woman don't do the same? trust me, when we are over a man,we won't keep in contact.Very good article tho, nice to hear a mans perspective,especially seeings as how most men don't communicate with woman very well.

Woman do it to spare the emotional expense.

[the-love-guru]

Sad, but true. Very well put. Thank you for taking the time to enlighten us with your words of wisdom. :) And I concur with your last sentence- it's so accurate.

BUT, what if they guy keeps you around because he wants to date you still, but knows that sex is the closest he'll get to having you back? Are you familiar to Lily Allen's songs? Perfect example of a woman calling the shots in a breakup.

[sabbasabba]

Sad but true! And I have someone doing this to me now, but I know better. And this made me completely sure of that, because it's validation on what I've been assuming his intentions were the whole time. Makes me glad I'm so cautious! lol

thank you for explaining it like this, it makes perfect sense

[Miss_All_Time_Low]

Great article. Although I'm a bit repulsed ... but thanks for letting us girls know. Keep spreading the word!

I just despise this kind of guys because girls usually don't know any better, they believe them, then they're left again ... and they can never move on because they don't let themselves, especially after something so intimate happened. It's rotten of the guy. :/

[Anonymous]

Your mistaken. It's us girls who keep exes as friends. We keep them as a back up because we don't want to be single during the holiday season, Valentine's, birthdays and big weddings.
It's kinda like a break glass. If we cheat with an ex it's because there's a problem in the relationship. We only have sex with an ex by our own decesion rather than anything special he did or any hold he has, it's because we want him more than our current boyfriend.

[Aiko_E_Lara]

And you don't know that some exes are exes because their relationship did not work well and they agreed to just be friends. And what about women who keep their ex their friends? Oh sure because you're biased that's why you're putting all generalization on men.

[MarcoIsAFailure]

I'd disagree. I know that I'll never have Sex with my ex again. But I like her... She is my best friend.
Why should I end a perfectly good friendship just because it used to be more than friendship for some period of time?

[Chelsayyyy]

I actually know some girls that keep exs around for back up plans. I mean of course any girls can have sex with any guy they wanted to and it would be easy, but some girls tell me that they keep the exs around because its familiar.

[Shadow-Wolf]

Guess this can be true in some cases. I know I'm best friends with my ex though, and not for the above reasons. Sure, still in love with her, but wouldn't want her to come back to me simply because I'm something familiar.

[Pink1996]

The only reasons people keep in contact with their ex is to 1. see what they are up to, see if they found someone better 2. see if they can get back with them.

[Kkaos]

Or maybe they're just friends?

[Kaneki05]

Welp that was nonesense for like half the guys who stay friends with an ex.

Tbh this guy don't know how to include some into any of his sentances.

[Thomastwobit]

Gone by and I wanna ask her out but I'm afraid to because I don't want to ruin our friendship and if I did screw up I'd hate to have her not give me a second chance just because she assumes the worst like the author of this article. But I am in now way trying to flame the author I am just putting out a different perspective on the topic. He may be right about guys and I'm a member of a minority of nice people but I'd like to believe a lot of other guys are like me.

[Thomastwobit]

I think this article is very unfair. People just love to lump people in a group because it's easier and appears to be profound. Well it's not it's just lazy. Please don't listen to this person and just put a generalization on us guys. Some really do care and feel terrible if they mess things up. Take me for example I have never dated before but this girl I like is my friend, I told her how I felt and she said she wasn't ready to date, I respected this and we remained friends, however a year has

[subina]

Absolutely true and couldn't agree more and this time I decided to end the friendship because I realized thta I was not moving ahead while he is having fun dating around.