EXes. Why do people care about them so much?

I see all these posts about EXes... Why does my ex not like me? This and that about an ex... should we get back together...

An EX means.. in the past. In my life, after any break up, an EX is out of my mind. I move on almost immediately and never think of, try to contact, check up on, etc.

Breakups happen for a reason...

I'm not talking about someone who moved away... I'm talking about relationships that ended due to cheating, abuse, incompatibility and such. an incompatible person will still be incompatible. An abuser only gets worse. Promises "to change" are always lies.

Who CARES about an EX? Who cares about what an EX thinks of them? I see people who whine about an ex spreading rumors or posting negative things on social media. Who cares? Their opinion should not matter at all. They are an EX... the past. No longer involved with you.

Then "breaks"... what's that all about? all this is is an admission you can't commit in a relationship. Taking a vacation from a relationship isn't going to fly.

ALSO... getting back together after a breakup.. or chasing someone to get back together... sorry folks, the same issues are gonna be there.

"But I still love hm/her" So? That doesn't mean THEY love you back. There was a reason the relationship ended.

This "closure" What's that about? No such thing... So what? It's over.. there is your closure.

Move on... where you found one guy/gal, there will always be more. Everyone goes through MANY breakups in their lives. This EX is just on in a long line of future exes. That is life.

Be well and be realistic.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I agree absolutely.

    When we walk forward, we shouldn't dwell on the past but the now.

    Learn what you needed to learn and move on. It looks very desperate, annoying to talk about your EX all the time. If they were so good, why did you let them go or vice versa?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • I agree 100%! I can't believe all the answers from people who don't see when it's over, it is freaking over! Oh well.

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    • BTW: You are right... notofthisword won't get an MHO :) plus, she blocked me, so I can't respond :) smh

What Girls Said 9

  • Whomever wonders why someone should never think about an ex again after a break up either has never had an ex, or didn't care about the ex to begin with.
    Just because someone is an ex doesn't mean its always resolved in terms of closure or feelings. I have an ex i will love for the rest of my life. Some people come into our lives that have that effect on us and just because things don't work out or mistakes are made doesn't mean the feelings just fade away like it never happened. The heart is big enough to hold many memories - and some for a very long time.

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  • With certain Ex's and people it is not as easy as just accepting the fact that they have to move on. It's been almost 2 weeks since my breakup with my ex, and I am not over it at all really yet. I can try to fool myself and convince myself to move on and that I don't care anymore, but the truth is I still do. Even though my friends tell me to drop contact I still talk to him at least once every day. He was a person that made a huge impact on my life, and I would never want him out of it completely. He was my first love, and helped me through very dark times. I know that I will always love him and care about him for the rest of my life, I can try to bury those feelings but they will always be there. When you fall in love with someone, those feelings will never easily just go away forever. Some exs make big impacts on our lives and it is not so easy to just move on and forget about them. That bond and feelings can always linger

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  • Because when you love someone that feeling doesn't go away so easily and sometimes when an ex returns the relationship is stronger than before

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  • Because they can post what they want

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  • you're wrong. my guys is worth so much more

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    • nope.. an ex is in the past... move forward.

  • Because those who are seeking advice or talking about their ex, are clearly still impacted by the them. Something happened that wasn't supposed to happen, so they're trying to talk and understand how to move forward; it's their coping mechanism.

    If you've ever had a first love or someone you sincerely loved so much, that you never wanted to let go, you'll understand why others have a hard time doing so. It's more than just mental, it's emotional and the people deal with it however they think works. I can say this because I was always one not to get in touch with their emotions or be deeply affected by things not working out, but my first relationship with my first love falling apart felt like I was hit by a truck and ran over and honestly, because of the intensity, it took a while. The thing is though, when that time is over and you move on, you actually move on and while the feelings are gone and you're no longer stuck asking why, or what or how, you remember them and continue because honestly when moving on happens, it actually happens to the point of no return.

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  • You don't love. You don't love anyone.

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    • Actually, yes.. I do... I'm happily married now and have been for a long time :) My philosophy WORKS. You move on from the bad ones until you find the good one :)

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    • ok...

    • Woman is so immature..

  • After me and my ex broke up I dated two guys. The breakup was since months ago and I still can't move on

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  • Because if feelings are still lingering, they will always be in your mind. And I highly doubt it that you've moved on from an ex as easy as ABC... highly doubt it. And I know for a fact you've talked to family and friends after a break-up regarding them. Human nature.

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    • uh.. no.. not me... I accept realities of a situation. when something is over, it is over, done. Friends would lose track of who I was dating... I told no one. I'd be dating someone new the same week I had a breakup. It really is that easy. lots of people out there.

    • Then you haven't TRULY love an ex imho.

What Guys Said 5

  • I do get what you're trying to say and logically you make a very valid point and I try to move on asap as well. Having said that, no one can control their feelings especially if it involves someone you truly and wholeheartedly loved. There's been studies that have shown that breakups with someone you're in love with has the same impact as a death of close family member. You're either burrowing your feelings which is very unhealthy (going through the grieving process is healthy and helps you develop into a better person) or you don't fully give yourself up to these girls. Most people can move on without a hitch when it comes to someone they never loved and you're confusing that with moving on with someone you were truly in love with.

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    • I respect your opinion. But... reality kicks in. When it's over, it is over. You realize that life continues and there are more people out there.

  • You have clearly never loved anyone if you can "move on almost immediately".
    It is easy to not care about losing someone when you have never cared about having them in the first place.

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    • All about facing reality. When it is over, it is over... a philosophy that has helped me easily transition into the next relationship. My first breakup DID hurt for a while... after the second, however, reality hit home. Where one relationship ends, another begins. Moving on quickly allows you to find a better relationship.

  • The problem is that more than likely the person that broke it off with their ex wasn't honest about the situation and will keep their ex in limbo so they can have a fall back plan (person)! Sickening to play with a persons feelings! Especially if they TRULY loved the other person. Just speaking from personal experience!

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  • Very true. good points

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  • Because they're not over them

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