First off, I have been very much struggling, so if you cannot be kind, PLEASE don't waste time commenting.
I went through a complicated break up and few months ago. He broke up with me during a fight, very much on the fly and closed me out. This is what he does so he does not have to feel real emotions. We were very close and it has been hard. He still talks to me and I think still cares and loves me but is forcing himself not to. (This is a whole nother story)
The last few weeks, we have still talked, but nothing deep and not often. He has gotten spacey with replies and I tried to act totally unbothered, even though it hurt. I miss him, even as my friend.
I am close with his mom and have visited her a few times when he was not there. I have had some health issues the last few months and recently have had a cancer scare. I ended up opening up to his mom briefly about it, honestly not even thinking she was going to tell a single soul. I just told her that they did some treatment and then I will go back in for follow up to see where things are at. She started sobbing on the phone and begged me to come over. I honestly have not even processed much of this. I guess she woke my ex up and told him and she continued crying with him. She told me his face went white and he softened a bit. She said he turned the other way and stared (he won't cry) and he did later reach out to me asking about it. I was on my way to their house to see his mom, so I opened the messages and decided I would just respond when I got there. He kept sending messages wanting to know what was going on. I was so embarrassed when I got there that his mom had told the whole family and they were being extra nice and I felt uncomfortable. He spent the day with me. But now have not heard from him. I know I need to worry about other things. But I wonder if he cares at all or if I should stop speaking to him. I wanted him back this entire time before knowing about the cancer.
I went through a complicated break up and few months ago. He broke up with me during a fight, very much on the fly and closed me out. This is what he does so he does not have to feel real emotions. We were very close and it has been hard. He still talks to me and I think still cares and loves me but is forcing himself not to. (This is a whole nother story)
The last few weeks, we have still talked, but nothing deep and not often. He has gotten spacey with replies and I tried to act totally unbothered, even though it hurt. I miss him, even as my friend.
I am close with his mom and have visited her a few times when he was not there. I have had some health issues the last few months and recently have had a cancer scare. I ended up opening up to his mom briefly about it, honestly not even thinking she was going to tell a single soul. I just told her that they did some treatment and then I will go back in for follow up to see where things are at. She started sobbing on the phone and begged me to come over. I honestly have not even processed much of this. I guess she woke my ex up and told him and she continued crying with him. She told me his face went white and he softened a bit. She said he turned the other way and stared (he won't cry) and he did later reach out to me asking about it. I was on my way to their house to see his mom, so I opened the messages and decided I would just respond when I got there. He kept sending messages wanting to know what was going on. I was so embarrassed when I got there that his mom had told the whole family and they were being extra nice and I felt uncomfortable. He spent the day with me. But now have not heard from him. I know I need to worry about other things. But I wonder if he cares at all or if I should stop speaking to him. I wanted him back this entire time before knowing about the cancer.
Updates
+1 y
I should also add that this is someone I love a lot. Not having them as close in my life has been very hard. I don't have a lot of support right now and am worried about many things. But the last two months the break up has very much affected my life and I care very much. I guess It is hard with someone who won't talk about it express emotions.
