Friendship after divorce?

[Ttaylor76]

If someone just got out of an emotionally abusive marriage, should they hang out and be friends with someone they used to have feelings for?

[WaterIsland]

No. If it’s emotionally abusive, especially not. But even without that, friendships after breakups or divorce are difficult. Of course if you have kids together you have to sometimes be amicable, but I wouldn’t even consider that friends.

[Ttaylor76]

I apologize. I didn’t mean be friends with the man she just divorced. I meant reconnect and be friends with someone from her past that she used to have feelings for

[WaterIsland]

Oh. It depends. Why did the friendship end? Why do you want to reach out again? Do you have feelings for this other person?

[Ttaylor76]

she got married so it just wasn’t appropriate for them to remain friends since at one time there were feelings there

[Ttaylor76]

And he was always a really good trusted friend. Probably the only one she ever had lol

[WaterIsland]

It can’t hurt I don’t think. What’s the worst that can happen?

[Ttaylor76]

Well she spoke with him shortly after she split up and he told her he didn’t want to influence any decisions she made. So she hasn’t text him again. What did he mean exactly?

[WaterIsland]

Exactly what he said probably. She could text him and just start a normal conversation. And if it comes up, she could say that she made her decision and it’s over and she got a divorce. He doesn’t want to influence any decisions. But she already made her decision. She just needs to make that crystal clear.

[Ttaylor76]

Is it because he is afraid she can’t just be friends?

[LiamJHayden]

No. It might be different if they jumped the gun and married, only to realize that they do not click in that type of a relationship, but an abuser should be avoided.

[Ttaylor76]

I don’t think I was clear on that. I didn’t mean be friends with the man she just divorced. I meant reconnect and be friends with someone she had feelings for in the past

[Guy13]

Yeah, the Selfie pretty much started in the 60s and made it to pictures around 1998 if I recall correctly from reading... Love of Self from Carl Rogers to Present.

[Guy13]

Hell Nahhh !! No Contact Rule for sure !!

[Ttaylor76]

Lol so no contact with men at all? No matter what kind they are 😍

[Ttaylor76]

I meant to send this one 😂🤦‍♀️

[Ttaylor76]

I don’t mean the man she just divorced. I mean an old friend she used to have feelings for, should she talk and hang around with him lol

[Guy13]

Alright... you mean checking out the guy who caused the divorce?

[Ttaylor76]

No lol this guy was way before the man she just divorced. He was a trusted friend before the feelings were there

[Guy13]

That sounds like a winner. A waiting in the wings of the building kind of guy. Sounds like you are excited.

[Ttaylor76]

Right now I’m not excited about any kind of relationship it would just be nice to have a trusted friend. Someone who doesn’t lie and manipulate

[Guy13]

Not even horny and can't stand the site of Wiener, eh...

[Ttaylor76]

Never thought I would say but right now yes. When u been through what I have sex is a tool

[Guy13]

Alright, you mean like a dominant thing or a Narcissist thing?

[Ttaylor76]

Narcissist that is the worst thing I have ever been through in my life

[MikeTheBartender]

Only if there are kids involved... Any abuse otherwise means no more contact.