Why would my ex tell me he loves me and wants me to also be texting another girl behind my back?

[Anonymous]

My ex texted me early one morning telling me he wanted me that he loved me and wanted to work on things with me.
I thought he was just drunk but he was telling me he wasn’t though out the day.
He left me on read 3pm that day and then texted me hey the following day then ghosted me for the week I texted him Thursday to say was he actually serious about what he said on Sunday and he was like he was and I said oh just it feels like your not talking to me.
And he said oh no I’ve just been down.
So he continues to ghost me and ignore me and then Friday he texts me giving me abuse because a girl I didn’t even know about blocked him because she found out I was his ex and heard how bad he treated me.
He said it was my fault and that I’m ruining his life.
But i didn’t even know this girl and didn’t know he was talking to her o just assumed he was down and was just talking to me I was extremely hurt.
He still told me he was telling me the truth on Sunday but I don’t understand how he was when he was talking to another girl the whole week behind my back asking her on dates n stuff.
And i there begging just for a text back?

I just feel so down he was telling me how beautiful she was and I just felt so worthless like why would he tell me all that Sunday to do that to me?

[Anonymous]

Well, now he’s fooled you twice, don’t let it happen a third time. Block him, he’s not a good man.

[BarryLiverstone]

She said she blocked him..

[Asker]

It’s been more than twice tbh but it gets worse and worse each time he fools me i just thought this time he was serious cause I’m not a bad person

[Opinion Owner]

@barry, I saw her say she blocked him but then what she wrote after looks like she has unblocked him to have the other exchanges so I’m like just block the guy for good pretty much.
@asker I think you should know by now what his words are worth. If it gets worse each time then what does that tell you? To me it says things won’t get better, he is who he is and has never shown otherwise. You keep giving him chances to hurt you and I can only imagine what that’s done for your frame of mind. Help yourself out a bit.

[Asker]

I know I just find it hard as when I was first with him he would have done everything and anything for me and we just did a lot of nice things together and it hurts because it’s like that person never existed and it was all in my head I feel like I’m insane that what I think and feel is crazy I just don’t get why he couldn’t just leave me alone if he didn’t want me like why keep torturing someone? He can have all the girls he wants why am I still in the background?

[Opinion Owner]

Notice how short lived the beginning was compared to when he got comfortable and started showing his true colors. There’s no relevancy to his good guy act anymore. As for him coming back, to me that should feel like more of an insult to you than anything. He IS out there getting girls, the only difference is when they stop putting up with his shit, he goes back to you because he knows you won’t shut him out. If I were you I’d be done letting him pick and choose when I was going to matter. Remember he will only do what you allow, so that torture and being kept on the back-burner are things you put yourself through tbh, not him. All you have to do is keep him blocked but you welcome that negativity when you even have the nerve to answer his call or text after all he’s done to you.

[Asker]

I know your right I just find it hard letting go because I do miss the person he used to be and I’m hurt a lot and I wanna fix things but I can’t but i know your right I’m everything u said there he just uses me when other girls shut him out I just don’t like Believing he can be that cruel especially knowing my feelings and how hurt I am but it’s my own fault for letting him do all that to me I need to just force myself to not respond to him and to not believe the lies he tells me. So keeping him blocked is the only way just so hard

[Opinion Owner]

It’s never easy as just cutting someone off that you really love and care about. But think about it like this, each time you take him back you hit the reset button on work you’ve already done to get over him, basically scratching off the scab as soon as it starts forming. He’s already shown you numerous times that he will not change, so maybe you should start acknowledging that rather than feed the fantasy of a future he can’t give. Once you really commit to cutting contact then after some time you’ll be able to see him for what he is without defending or making excuses for him and yourself. You wanna get to the point where you genuinely don’t even want to hear a word from him but you can’t get there if you keep taking him back.

[Asker]

I know I just feel I like I’ll never get over him he’s always on my mind as much as I try to tell myself how bad he is and think of the pain I don't know why I find it so hard I’ve done months before with no contact but then I break it when he says something that makes me think what if.. I just have to be super strong and not give in

[Opinion Owner]

Yes, being strong is key! Mindset is important as well, being able to remind yourself of the pain you’ve experienced and the wrong he’s done instead of feeding into his lies. The what if’s just don’t matter when he’s never proven himself able to be that person for you. Keep things in perspective.

[Asker]

Why couldn’t he prove him self of his words when he said them to me? and why let me go like that and treat me so badly? For someone who says they care tho I mean if you hated someone u would just ignore them and treat them them badly?

[Opinion Owner]

See, questions like that just aren’t helpful to you right now. If you keep focusing on the hurtful aspects of the breakup you’ll never get over him. Like aren't you tired of being stuck while he’s in a whole new relationship? He just wasn’t a good man, everything beyond that like why did he do this or that, why couldn’t he love you properly, why couldn’t he prove himself, its all irrelevant when you’re trying to heal.

[JustMeL120]

Guys never say they live girls unless they really do or really dont.

[Asker]

Well he really doesn’t if he’s able to tell me that and text another girl behind my back and ask her out on dates

[JustMeL120]

Honestly he doesn't he sounds entitled. If i was you i would cire comination with this guy. He will eneventual regret losing you by that time you would have moved on to a guy who actualy loves you.

[Anonymous]

He miss you when he is horny...
Be his private prostitute

[Asker]

But why me when he has other girls?

[Opinion Owner]

Because you have sexy hole..
What's your boobs size?

[Asker]

Ehh no he’s just a jerk and seems u are too

[Opinion Owner]

Yes I'm

[BarryLiverstone]

Because you didn’t block him

[Asker]

I did but he was telling me he was serious and saying things I haven’t heard in a very long time I believed him

[BarryLiverstone]

How could he be texting you when you blocked him?

[Asker]

He emails me

[BarryLiverstone]

Block his email account

[Asker]

I did it just goes to spam

[In_Trance]

stop interacting with your ex

[Asker]

Okay

[Anonymous]

that's fucked up

[Asker]

I know 🥲