Do narcs feel bad after hurting someone?

[Anonymous]

Well do they? I dumped him because he asked if i wanted to be with him or not and hurt me by
asking something so stupid because i thought we were together. Threatening to leave me and thinking its a joke when i cry. And talking about his ex in our relationship. He was even physical

[Oliverlogan263]

Uh oh, sounds like you went through some messed up stuff with that guy. A real jerk for sure.

From what I know about "narcs," which I'm guessing means narcissists, they usually don't feel bad about hurting people, even if they claim to. Everything is usually all about how things affect them and making others feel small to boost their ego.

Threatening to leave you and being physical are major red flags too. You definitely did the right thing dumping him - that behavior is not okay at all.

As for feeling bad, narcs may play at being sorry to try and get you back under their thumb. But deep down they don't actually care about others' feelings much. Everything is just a big game to them.

Best thing to do is try and move on from him altogether. Work on being happy and feeling strong without needing his approval. Easier said than done, I know, but you seem smarter than to fall for fake apologies. Stay away from toxic dudes like that in the future - you deserve way better treatment!

[jahaims]

No that is part of being one. They can't empathize etc

[Anonymous]

No they don’t. They don’t even take responsibility for it, they think it’s your own fault. Even if it’s very obviously not, they make up any sort of excuse in their head of why you deserved it. Their abuse or mean behavior was justified, in their eyes. They can feel bad about something they did but only if it affected them in some sort of negative way. For example if they abused you enough that they went to jail for it they may feel bad about it, but not because they feel bad or guilty about abusing you, but because they were sent to jail. They don’t care at all that they hurt you and how it’s affected you, and will still think it’s your own fault you were abused. They just feel bad and remorse over that they got themselves a prison sentance. You know the whole thing of not feeling bad over what they did, just feeling bad they got caught - that’s typical of narcissists.

[provokeesmokee]

No, narcissists are self-centered as a rule and rarely have the capacity to care about or consider others.

[Anonymous]

I guess you mean narcissistic, and not a narcotics agent, some guys just don’t care

[Wise4myage]

No I wouldn't, and that dude sounds like a jackass.