60% of married women cheat on their husbands?

[Hades]

Just read this article - link

What do you think about it? Please share your thoughts & discuss.

[OpenClose]

This means one of a few things, on behavioral terms.

1. Women's libidos are supposedly about as high as men's naturally, and that through socialization, women learn to detach themselves from it, resulting in rather unexpected releases.

It's similar to how men are trained to detach themselves from their own feelings. Hiding it causes more damage than good.

2. Men's libido is rather strongly pushed. Practically everything thrown at us is sexual. Our libidos are exaggerated, and a woman's underestimated. Based on supply and demand, women basically have sexual control and choice. In other words, it's easier for women to get laid if they really want it. They have more of an option to "test the playing field" should they so choose.

3. We tend to place women on a moral pedestal, which shouldn't be happening for either gender. The thing about a moral pedestal, is that we ignore the faults of the raised group. That is, my placing women on a moral pedestal:

-If they cheat, "the guy wasn't good enough to earn her company",

-If they abuse, "He must've done it first. He must've done something to deserve it."

By placing oppressor/victim roles, good/evil roles, as popularized by the film industry. Meaning men are seldom trusted, even when they're trustworthy, and women are trusted by default.

All this does is detract us from the objective reality.

Lisabisca mentioned her study. There was also a cultural study that said if women were given the choice to remarry, only about 30% would remarry the same man.

These aren't statistics to blow off, but something about America compels us not to analyze ourselves. Something is not natural here, that much is certain.

Another theory I've heard is that America is relentless with its standards towards what entails a "man", because we're only focusing on the standards we place on women. There was a movement started on the premise that a man can be more himself outside the country, and therefore find a better relationship. This is something I have yet to test for myself, but in studying Euro vs. Amero culture, this just might be the case.

I've found that much more mellow men are widely accepted, and male sexuality isn't distrusted. Similarly, there is more mutuality in starting relationships. A man isn't expected to "earn her company" so much, as they just discover each other. In Sweden, for instance, if a guy takes a girl out for dinner, and especially if he pays, it almost scares the women away, almost like it's an act of desperation. And for a woman to EXPECT such treatment is absolutely unacceptable. Yet, this is still common courtesy in America. Meaning the average Swedish man would be considered sub-par by American standards.

That's my 25c on the subject. Just my own studies.

[kholland65]

Sounds to me like I need to move to Europe. You bring up a good point and one I'm am somewhat aware of. I just call it something different. "Female entitlement". In America, women feel like they are the queens whom men must compete and prove their worth too. They don't have any expectations just sit and let the guy do all the work. In addition, the men are always given the blame to all situations as if women are the superior gender.

[OpenClose]

In a sense, yes. Perhaps not so much "Female entitlement" as simply "treating women like children", as it stems from a philosophy that is as much insulting to women as it is blaming of men.

[OpenClose]

link

[AmerRestInit]

@kholland65 Look up evopsych and brain development. Women only mature faster in that their brains stop developing in their early teens while men can continue brain development into their thirties. Women are LITERALLY mental children. Now, add to that the biological costs of fidility: it cost genetic opportunities and the abilility to gain resources (goods, services, protection, favors, status) by tying her to a single man. Cavewomen who were loyal would have less mating opportunities, less resources, and more limited genetic options. This means less surviving offspring to carry on their lineage. Women are running on inferior hardware and outdated software telling them to cheat. What else could we expect from them? There are no magical foreign women, just women. Know the game, don't waste your life on lies.

[kholland65]

I've heard also that harvard did a study that showed women cheat 30% more than men.

What I think it all comes down to is that women are emotionally unstable. I don't mean in the sense that they are up and down emotionally all the time. What I mean is they lack the amount of control that men have over their emotions. A man's emotions are a calm car battery, a women's is a volatile nuclear reactor.

In a more practical sense, what I'm saying is that men are better and using their brains to real in their emotions, and even if some hot/awesome girl crosses his path, he knows how to prevent himself from being emotionally attached. Women on the other hand are like a bull in a china shop. Her emotions have a mind of their own, a guy can come around that is horrible for her or that would ruin her already great relationship, but if all of a sudden she starts developing feelings (which she has no control over btw), its game over. She's a slave to her emotions, like men are arguably slaves to their penis. I find the prior to be scarier.

[kholland65]

Oh and by the way everything in that article is spot on.

[OpenClose]

I've heard that statistic, but I disagree with your theory. It's been shown that men experience more intense emotions, and the difference is that women are allowed to be more expressive of theirs. I think it has more to do with America's traditionalist standards of "real men", that most ACTUAL men don't meet.

[kholland65]

Intense doesn't mean out of control. Maybe we do have more intense emotions but I think we are better and controlling them and making sure it stays on target. Girls have emotional ADD. They're in love one day, the next day there f***ing some other dude who is now their new found heartthrob, that did nothing but wave to them in a bar.

[AmerRestInit]

Emotional ADD... lol. Yeah, sounds like a pretty good description to me.

[Izzy2102]

Really there are so many statistics on that. Some say 30% of women cheat and 40% of men, others say it's 60% of women and 65% of men and then others say it's 65% of women and 50% of men. The article even said it, you can get accurate numbers there.

They made a few good points though. From what I know most older statistics imply a way higher percentage of men cheating than women and as women get increasingly more independent it makes sense that they begin to cheat more than they used to. So that numbers are now more equal. If they assume 60% of women cheat I would a roughly equal amount of men cheat, 60% of all married people cheat and that's horrible. Personally I don't think I could ever cheat and I would leave my husband/boyfriend if he did.

[carlo]

as if women were saints in the past. women have always cheated just like men did. come on girls, come down from your high horses. we know you have a bitter morale than anyone else in this planet, so why don't you show the way now that you are becoming more independent i.e. you shouldn't need to cheat now more than before because no one is forcing you to stay with that person?

[carlo]

*better

[Izzy2102]

sure some cheated, but being aware that with getting a divorce they could lose their children, their home, their social credibility and may end up homeless without any means, kept some from doing it. At least more than it does now.

No we don't need to cheat more now you're right, but consequences are not as severe as they used to be, so quite obviously more women are willing to take that risk. It's not that those women wouldn't have wanted it back then, but it came at much to high a risk

[AmerRestInit]

@Izzy2102 Really? Than links please, because I haven't seen it. Honestly, 60% hits low from what I've seen, but you are right that variation exists even if only due to the sample sizes, locations, time frames, and demographics involved.

[lisabisca]

that's horrible! those poor men. I read a different article a short while back that stated that 38% of all people who are married in the US have discovered that they married the wrong person. I also read a great article that compared American women and French women in terms of how they love others and how they approach love, American women are calculating and absolute and unrelenting with their plans and need for a certain storybook type of romance and type of guy but French women realize that there are different types of love, and that even though you love someone it is not always meant to last or that it works it self out in certain parts of life

[OpenClose]

Or compare with India. They generally don't keep track of who owes who. Some families will even make dinner especially to invite other people over. The value of the person comes before the value of the dollar. American's are almost vengeful in comparison. It's almost common practice for wives to weaponize sex as punishment/reward, rather than an important bonding time. We're pitted against each other more often than we are taught empathy.

[lisabisca]

it's to me at least seems to be part of the negative aspects of having youth and youthfulness being more revered than wisdom. We seem to live in fear of one another and their opinions and revel in the high risk of capitalism. I don't mean to say I am against capitalism or that I am for something else but there are positives and negatives in any system.

[lisabisca]

I just hope that the man I spend the rest of my life with is happy with me and the love, support, compassion. respect and fun that I will always try to bring into his life and our relationship will not go unappreciated and that we can make each others lives' better and not worse. I certainly would never cheat, if anything if there were problems, it would just make me want to try harder to make him happy and work through his/our concerns and struggles both as a couple and as individuals

[lisabisca]

and he has to love music, on this I will not budge, ;)

[Hades]

How noble. But I wonder how many women who have cheated said similar things.

[lisabisca]

oh no! I am not a cheater! I am not disillusioned but romance movies like the Notebook, I'm not a serial dater or loose, I just want that partner that I can share parts of my life and being that I will never want to share with anyone else, I just want to find my best friend and finally start to grow old with him :(

[lisabisca]

besides I certainly won't get the real satisfaction and love and appreciation I would be looking for in some random guy because when all is said and done and no matter how much this fling guy likes me when I am having this hypothetical affair he will never truly love or know me they way my husband or boyfriend would. What I want can only come from one person

[AmerRestInit]

Sorry, but that doesn't add up. American and French, both are post-feminist. Feminism says "cheating is empowering" and "but men do it, too". I trust no western women, and have known enough European woman not to believe in ridiculous claims placing woman x on a pedestal because woman x says she belongs there. The stats vary SLIGHTLY, but ALL women have the same biology and all western women have the same ethical philosophy. This, however, is not to put eastern women on a pedestal... Just look at the survey that found 60% of Japanese widows who did not divorce were relieved that their husbands died. Honestly, I won't even touch on the mess that is black women: BWGTOW did a fine job all on it's own. Look, at the end of the day, men just need to recognize women's interest for what it really is: a biological drive towards genetically fit mates with money and power which can be grabbed. Women do not love like men do, and are most likely biologically incapable of it. There are no unicorns.

[ilovebender]

I don't believe it. Who is this woman? What are her credentials? If any? How did she come up with that percentage? I doubt any creditable methods were used to come up with that number. The article never says. I call bull sh*t.

The one woman interviewed who did cheat, cheated because her husband cheated first. Not saying her reaction was the best way to go but I guess they had a hard time finding an interview with a woman who cheated when her husband was loyal. The fact they picked her says a lot to me.

[AmerRestInit]

Really? Because this is old news... Just look up the article the NYpost did on 60% of women cheating and 90% feeling entitled to it. Look, I had plenty of friends in the army loose wives to cheating, plenty out of it, too. I had plenty more of both to dumb or insecure to walk away. If anything, I think the numbers are low... but that would fit. 60% is just those wives who cheat and don't care enough to admit it. Its the one's who don't confess that really pile those numbers up. I'd say at least 75% at a minimum, probably much higher...

[G_GTom]

There was an article a while back that came somewhere out of england that stated 10% of men are raising children that are not biologically theirs unbeknownst to them. Women have put themselves on a pedestal, but the certainly don't deserve to be there.

Women have always been just as bas a men, but now they have the social acceptance and financial independence to do it.

[AmerRestInit]

I remember that one... Wish i could remember where I saw it.

[palek]

And the other 40% are either fat or frigid or both.

[aMuse]

lol

[palek]

; - )

[Moloch]

Lmao

[eaeaea]

:O

[palek]

Ha! ; - )

[AmerRestInit]

Jokes aside, I wonder if there is a link between obesity and cheating given obesity is linked to low iq and lack of self-control...

[Brando]

The person interviewed "believes" that around 60 percent of women will cheat?

Come on man, you didn't catch that as CBS wanting to post up a readable story?

[AmerRestInit]

NYpost has a 2003 article to colaborate the data.

[misuzi]

65% of divorces are initiated by women, but it's the men who are bad

[AmerRestInit]

65% is the overall US divorce rate. 70% is the percentage of divorces are initiated by women.

[6Paul11]

I believe it. Just means that we men need to be more selective in who we love and trust.

Most women are just waiting for the next best thing.

[AmerRestInit]

I loved my dogs. They were loyal to the core. Women can be fun (though often just needy and demanding while providing nothing in return but that which my left hand could do better), but I'd never trust them. Seen them destroy too many good men.

[eaeaea]

We are good learners. Thanks for being excellent teachers guys! ;] We learn from the best and we master the plan!

[doubleoh]

kind of lame but whatever

[gonyr]

not all guys cheat. in fact (and not from this article, just from seeing it in life) its the girl who cheats most of the time

[carlo]

here come the saints and it's all the pigs fault, e-v-e-r-y f-u-c-k-i-n-g single time. god forbid a woman is sh*te like anyone else. come down from the pedestall darling, the fall is gonna be very hard otherwise

[Hades]

Women = Good, Men = Bad, apparently.

[AmerRestInit]

So when a woman cheats on an honest man, its men's fault for those few who had cheated even if we do it less? Look, if you choose to fall onto some random guy's dick WHILE IN A COMMITTED RELATIONSHIP, you are the one who did that. Quite blaming men, take responsibility for your own actions and show some smidgen of character before you drive all men into MGTOW.

[XRabbitHeartX]

I seldom believe statistics.

[kholland65]

That's because you are a women and therefore detest anything that involves logic.

[XRabbitHeartX]

Not really. Statistic can be manipulated. It's based on sample groups that do not always represent the truth of the matter or the reality. Screw logic. Use common sense. It's impossible that one statistic is going to be the absolute truth unless they went around asking every single woman on the surface of this planet and not just relying on the sample group.

[AmerRestInit]

@XRabbitHeartX Common sense is nothing but the prejudices one has accumulated since childhood. I trust GOOD statistics, but I reserve the right to look over the methods and sample before passing judgement, and would prefer there to be collaborating finding before I fully accept it. That said, I find it most likely that the issue you have is not with statistics in general, but rather the generally negative findings of these statistics about your gender. This is natural, although certainly not admirable, given humans are self-interested by nature and women far more so than men (hence why women and children first was created, much less allowed, by a physically superior gender who could have easily thrown said women and children off the lifeboats, and why women left their men to die). In the end, however, facts are facts. These do nothing more than confirm what we have already seen over and over again in our lives and the lives of our fathers, brothers, sons, friends and other relations.

[XRabbitHeartX]

Yeah because men never cheat. I know more stories of men cheating than women cheating in my life. It is relative. If you think it is a fact of life that women cheat more then great that is YOUR opinion still. It is not a fact. Not by any sensible means. There is no universal study on this either so guess what, at the end, you are still not speaking from a factual view but rather a emotionally charged one.

[Xx_DRE_xX]

Not surprised.

[JennieF]

That doesn't surprise me.

[handsomejackk]

Fact of life.

[AmerRestInit]

Not the bachelor's life: Everything is half-priced, we do what we want when we want, and nobody steals half our stuff and most our future earning when the choose to break contract from boredom. If I want a companion, I'll get a dog. At least when they hump my friends leg, I can still keep my house and my friend.