"All men just want sex!" and why this shouldn't deter you from pursuing them.

WesTheGuru

I can't tell you how many times I've seen women say "Seems like all men just want sex right away. Aren't there any good men anymore?". Women need to stop looking at this as though it is a negative, and see it for what it truly is.


The fact of the matter is, if a man is interested in you, he will want to have sex with you, just like if you are interested in a man you will desire him sexually. There are key differences in the sexual desire between men and women that women often neglect, which leads them to this incorrect conclusion that all men want to simply have sex with you and then be completely done with you.


The first factor that women don't consider is that men have to be the initiators of sex 99% of the time.


"All men just want sex!" and why this shouldn't deter you from pursuing them.

Women are used to picking and choosing when and where sex will occur, especially if they are attractive. For a man to have sex it is virtually "hit or miss". You, as women are the deciders of when sex happens, and, in my experiences, we as men could ask you as women the same question 10 minutes apart and get different answers entirely. "Women reserve the right to change their mind", and you certainly employ this right whenever your minds deem it favorable. Because we have to initiate, unless we are sexually driven, we will be sexually starved.


Another factor that women have to consider is that; while you as women are made for monogamy, men are not.

"All men just want sex!" and why this shouldn't deter you from pursuing them.

The primary carnal instinct of all life is to ensure that the life of it's species (and more specifically your gene pool) continues. Humans are no exception to this rule. If a woman procreates, it is nearly a year long process of carrying and developing another human inside of yourself. For a considerable time of this process, women are significantly less capable of providing for themselves. Both near and shortly after child birth, women must focus the entirety of themselves on their child. This leaves them in a vulnerable situation, and makes it unlikely for them to have any other partner during this time. Women also are capable (although with modern technology it is no longer necessary) of feeding their child in a way a man simply is incapable of doing through breastfeeding. They not only bring their child into the world, but are also responsible for sustaining their life shortly after, which also leaves less time for finding additional partners. Men do not have these issues. While, if a man is taking care of one woman, or having a child by one woman, it might be more tiresome to take care of another, but by no means is it impossible. A man can easily have two or more children at the same time with two or more woman, and (if his situation allows it) provide for them all adequately. A woman is simply incapable of procreating with multiple partners at once (barring a genetic anomaly that would likely result in her death). So, evolutionary speaking; it is favorable for one man to have multiple multiple women, while it is favorable for multiple woman have one man. This way, the most genetically favorable men can pass down their genes more frequently, and the the most fertile women can ensure that they are taken care of during their vulnerable stages. This is why men in older times had multiple wives and not visa/versa.


Another point that goes completely over a woman's head is that men are not interested in wasting their time.

"All men just want sex!" and why this shouldn't deter you from pursuing them.

As said before, women are very fickle beings and change their minds often. I theorize that this is partially because of the long standing oppression of women in general, which caused them to be legally unable to make decisions lingering throughout modern society, but that's another discussion entirely. Regardless of the reason; women change their mind A LOT. While in high school and early years of university boys might be more tolerant of the fickle nature of women, but past this point the game gets old. Men eventually learn, "if you are not willing to do things for me that you wouldn't for others, you aren't very interested in me." When a man asks you out, he wants you. If a woman says yes it is understood that she wants the man as well. If the feeling of attraction is mutual then sex should be desired by both parties. And because we have to initiate, we test the waters to see if it is on the table as soon as possible. If it is a top priority, and your answer is no, then we move on to someone who's answer is yes. No time wasted.


My last point of this take is; just because he wants to have sex with you, doesn't mean he is uninterested in a realtionship.

"All men just want sex!" and why this shouldn't deter you from pursuing them.

The most common thing I see women doing is abandoning men that wanted sex on the first date simply because of the fact. What women don't understand is that if a man wants to have sex with you, all it means is that he is attracted to you. If he is bold enough to ask you to come back with him after a date, then it likely means he is not only attracted to you, but also means he enjoyed your company, and does not want the date to end. This is a good sign more than a bad sign, as a man who will not pursue further relations afterward is either too cowardly, or too influenced by societal pressures. Regardless of whether you take him up on his offer or not, this should never be a reason to cut him off entirely.


In short, just because he wants sex, doesn't mean he's a player. It simply means he is a man.And honestly girls, would you really want a man who DID NOT find you sexually attractive? Because I'm sure no one wants a partner who does not desire them.

"All men just want sex!" and why this shouldn't deter you from pursuing them.
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